What Are Perceptions? Cognitive interpretations of people, things, and events within your world

Dan Miller “perception”

Perception Intervention Selective awareness Focusing on the positive Realize that there is both good and bad in every situation Perspective Look around “Take time to smell the Roses” page 133 We don’t have it “so bad” Contentment Comparison Envy

Perception Intervention Attitude Gratitude & thankfulness “Attitude of Gratitude” Sand analogy: can either irritate or create Sand in Oyster makes Sand can cause a blister on your foot or be silicon for surgery Road crew working: 1 st says moving dirt, 2 nd says making a living, 3 rd says building a highway! Humor- “Patch Adams” Self Esteem Self perception & value

Perception Intervention cont. Locus of control Internal vs. external External locus of control: perception that one has little control over these events Internal locus of control: perception that one has a good deal of control over life events Type ‘A’ vs. ‘B’ behavior “A”- a particular complex of personality traits, including excessive competitive drive, aggressiveness, impatience, and a harrying sense of time urgency. “B”- Behavior pattern that is not excessively competitive, with no free-floating hostility and no sense of time urgency. “C” and “D” page 141

“Type A” Behavior High competitiveness Chronic sense of time urgency Fast-paced actions and speech Aggressive, ambitious, achievement- orientation Difficulty relaxing without feeling guilty Impatience and hostility Social isolation Hurry Sickness

“If you hire good attitudes, you can teach them nuclear physics. If you hire bad attitudes, you can’t teach them to shovel pea gravel.” Wal-Mart Executive

Anxiety Management Environmental planning Plan your day around environment- traffic Re-labeling Give it a different label or name, look at it differently Self talk Send yourself positive messages, you control your thoughts Thought stopping Use thoughts/memories to take your mind off problems/stress Controlling Unrealistic Fear

Mental health studies regarding forgiveness Forgiveness mitigates depression and anxiety, increases self-esteem, and improves physical health and emotional well-being Forgiveness releases people from living in bondage and allows them to live in freedom. It heals the soul. Forgiveness is a process, not an event. It is a decision of the will, not an emotion we feel.

Who owns the problem? “ I” own the problem What action can I take to solve the problem? “You” own the problem Just listen, are there actions you can take to solve this problem?

Who owns the problem? “We” own the problem What actions can we take to solve this problem? You have no problem If no action can be taken in the first three questions.

Be a resource person, not a rescuer! Three feelings you get when you try to ‘fix’ things outside your control: Frustration Helplessness Hopelessness

Anxiety Management ABCDE Technique A – Activating Agent Identify stressor B – Belief System Identify irrational beliefs C – Consequence Mental and physical D – Dispute Irrational Beliefs E – Effects & Changed Consequences Controlling Unrealistic Fear

Hardiness People who are hardy have the “3 C’s” Commitment Control Challenge Hardy people are able to better withstand the onslaught of stressors Become ill less often from stressors Have less psychological distress, increased happiness and adjustment, and happier marriages