Healthy Limits Signs and Symptoms Barriers Character Study – Daniel Skills for Setting Boundaries Team Time Agenda

Page 39  We must set healthy limits on our:  Body  Feelings  Attitudes  Behaviors  Maturity is the process of properly realizing what our real limits are  Overly strict limits → never find true capacity  Few limits → overextend ourselves  Fences let the good in and keep the bad out  Thoughts  Abilities  Choices  Desires

 Resentment  Passive-Aggressive Behavior  Indirect resistance to demands for adequate performance in social or work settings  Codependency  Putting the other person first, often to their own detriment  Victim Mentality and Blaming  Feelings of Obligation  For a complete list, see notes

 Past Injury  Injuries can make it more difficult to take responsibility  Distorted Thinking  Ourselves  “I am bad for having boundaries”  Others  “They will hate me for saying no”  God  “God thinks I’m selfish when I say no to others”  For a complete list, see notes

 Daniel 1:8-20  How were Daniel’s relationships?  With God  With others  With himself  How did Daniel set boundaries in captivity?  Who else did the boundaries effect?  What was the outcome of the boundaries?  Respect, freedom, personal growth, etc.  Fiery Furnace trial  Interpreting dream to spare lives

 Skills for Setting Boundaries  Gain awareness – know yourself, ownership  Define who you are  Define who you are not  Develop the “no” muscle  Stop blaming others and playing victim  Set limits  Choose values  Challenge distorted thinking  For a complete list, see notes

 Volunteer to share REBT sheet  In your teams, the goal is truth & grace  Take turns speaking and listening  If you need more time, work it out