HOW TO RESOLVE CONFLICTS WITHOUT OFFENDING ANYONE

IF YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH OTHER IF YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH OTHER PEOPLE, YOU WILL, SOONER OR LATER, HAVE TO DEAL WITH CONFLICT. CONFLICT IS NOT INHERENTLY BAD. IN FACT, CONFLICT SIMPLY STEMS FROM DIFFERING VIEWPOINTS.

SINCE NO TWO PEOPLE VIEW THE WORLD EXACTLY THE SAME WAY, DISAGREEMENT IS QUITE NORMAL.

CONFLICT DEVELOPS BECAUSE WE ARE DEALING WITH PEOPLE’S LIVES, JOBS, CHILDREN, PRIDE, SELF-CONCEPT, EGO AND SENSE OF MISSION OR PURPOSE.

EARLY INDICATORS OF CONFLICT CAN BE RECOGNIZED. THEY ARE: 1) BODY LANGUAGE(CROSSED ARMS) 2) DISAGREEMENTS, REGARDLESS OF ISSUE. ISSUE.

3. INCREASING LACK OF RESPECT FOR YOU OR THE CLUB. FOR YOU OR THE CLUB. 4. STRONG PUBLIC STATEMENTS. (IN PERSON OR THROUGH MEDIA) (IN PERSON OR THROUGH MEDIA)

WHEN CONFLICT IS DESTRUCTIVE? CONFLICT IS DESTRUCTIVE WHEN IT: 1) TAKES ATTENTION AWAY FROM OTHER IMPORTANT ACTIVITIES. OTHER IMPORTANT ACTIVITIES. 2) POLARIZES PEOPLE AND GROUPS REDUCING COOPERATION. REDUCING COOPERATION.

3. UNDERMINES MORALE OR SELF- CONCEPT. CONCEPT. 4) LEADS TO IRRESPONSIBLE AND HARMFUL BEHAVIOR, SUCH AS HARMFUL BEHAVIOR, SUCH AS FIGHTING, NAME CALLING. FIGHTING, NAME CALLING.

WHEN IS CONFLICT CONSTRUCTIVE? CONFLICT IS CONSTRUCTIVE WHEN IT: 1) RESULTS IN CLARIFICATION OF IMPORTANT PROBLEMS AND ISSUES. IMPORTANT PROBLEMS AND ISSUES. 2) RESULTS IN SOLUTION TO PROBLEMS.

3. HELPS RELEASE EMOTION, ANXIETY, AND STRESS. AND STRESS. 4) HELPS PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THEMSELVES AND THE GROUP. THEMSELVES AND THE GROUP.

5. BUILDS COOPERATION AMONG PEOPLE THORUGH LEARNING ABOUT PEOPLE THORUGH LEARNING ABOUT EACH OTHER. EACH OTHER.

IN THIS MODULE TODAY WE ARE GOING TO EXAMINE TWO MAIN AREAS WHERE CONFLICTS OCCUR IN LIONISM: 1) CONFLICTS IN INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS RELATIONSHIPS 2) CONFLICTS IN MEETINGS

CONFLICTS IN INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS SOMETIMES IN INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS, SUCH AS YOU AND ANOTHER MEMBER OF YOUR CLUB, THERE MAY BE A CONFLICT THAT YOU ARE NOT AWARE OF.

IF SOMEONE WHO IS NORMALLY UPBEAT AND FRIENDLY TOWARD YOU SUDDENLY BEGINS AVOIDING YOU OR BEING RUDE, THERE IS USUALLY A REASON.

IF THE PERSON HAS REMAINED CHEERFUL WITH EVERYONE ELSE BUT YOU, THE CHANCES ARE YOU ARE DEALING WITH A CONFLICT SITUATION.

IN THESE INSTANCES, YOU WILL WANT TO ADDRESS THE PROBLEM BY PROCEEDING THROUGH THE FOLLOWING STEPS: 1) TRY TO DETERMINE IF THERE IS A PROBLEM BETWEEN YOU AND THE PROBLEM BETWEEN YOU AND THE OTHER PERSON. OTHER PERSON.

2. IF YOU THINK THERE IS A PROBLEM, SET UP A FACE-TO-FACE MEETING SET UP A FACE-TO-FACE MEETING TO DISCUSS THE PROBLEM WITH TO DISCUSS THE PROBLEM WITH THE OTHER PERSON. THE OTHER PERSON.

3.IN A NONCONFRONTATIONAL MANNER ASK THE PERSON IF THERE IS A ASK THE PERSON IF THERE IS A PROBLEM. IF HIS/HER ANSWER IS PROBLEM. IF HIS/HER ANSWER IS “NO” INFORM THE PERSON THAT YOU “NO” INFORM THE PERSON THAT YOU THINK THERE IS A PROBLEM AND THINK THERE IS A PROBLEM AND EXPLAIN WHAT YOU THINK THE EXPLAIN WHAT YOU THINK THE PROBLEM IS. PROBLEM IS.

4. AS YOU TALK, ASK FOR FEEDBACK. DO NOT “ATTACK” THE OTHER DO NOT “ATTACK” THE OTHER PERSON WITH ACCUSATIONS. PERSON WITH ACCUSATIONS.

5. TRY TO LISTEN TO EACH OTHER WITH OPEN MINDS. WITH OPEN MINDS.

6. BE SURE TO RESPECT EACH OTHER’S OPINIONS. AGREE TO OTHER’S OPINIONS. AGREE TO DISAGREE. DISAGREE.

7. TAKE A FEW MINUTES TO RECYCLE THE OTHER PERSON’S OPINIONS THE OTHER PERSON’S OPINIONS IN YOUR MIND. IN YOUR MIND.

8. TRY TO DETERMINE WHY THE OTHER PERSON FELT THE WAY OTHER PERSON FELT THE WAY THEY DID. THEY DID.

9. AVOID “FINGER-POINTING.”

10. FINALLY, TRY TO WORK OUT A COMPROMISE THAT PLEASES BOTH COMPROMISE THAT PLEASES BOTH OF YOU. OF YOU.

CONFLICTS IN MEETINGS CONFLICTS IN MEETINGS CAN BE VERY DISRUPTIVE. BUT THEY CAN ALSO BE VERY HELPFUL. REMEMBER CONFLICTS ARE DISAGREEMENTS. IF THE PERSON WHO IS DISAGREEING WITH YOU IS RAISING VALID QUESTIONS, IT MAY BENEFIT THE CLUB TO ADDRESS THE ISSUES THEY ARE PRESENTING.

IN FACT, BY LISTENING TO THEM, YOU MAY GAIN VALUABLE INSIGHT INTO WHAT IS AND WHAT IS NOT WORKING IN YOUR CLUB. HOWEVER, IF THE PERSON CONTINUES PAST THE POINT OF DISAGREEMENT TO THE POINT DISRUPTIVENESS, SPECIFIC STEPS SHOULD BE TAKEN.

TACTICS FOR GAINING CONTROL 1) FIND SOME “GRAIN OF TRUTH” IN THE OTHER PERSON’S POSITION THAT YOU CAN BUILD UPON. 2) IDENTIFY AREAS OF AGREEMENT 2) IDENTIFY AREAS OF AGREEMENT

3) DEFER THE SUBJECT TO LATER IN THE MEETING TO HANDLE. THE MEETING TO HANDLE. 4) HAVE YOUR SECRETARY TAKE NOTE 4) HAVE YOUR SECRETARY TAKE NOTE OF THE SUBJECT AND DISCUSS AT OF THE SUBJECT AND DISCUSS AT NEXT MEETING NEXT MEETING

5) ASK TO SPEAK WITH THE INDIVIDUAL AT YOUR BREAK OR AFTER THE AT YOUR BREAK OR AFTER THE MEETING. MEETING. 6) SEE IF SOMEONE ELSE MIGHT HAVE A RESPONSE OR RECOMMENDATION. A RESPONSE OR RECOMMENDATION.

7) AGREE THAT THE PERSON HAS A VALID POINT AND THERE MAY BE VALID POINT AND THERE MAY BE SOME WAY TO MAKE THE SITUATION SOME WAY TO MAKE THE SITUATION WORK FOR BOTH PARTIES. WORK FOR BOTH PARTIES.

RULES FOR DISAGREEING DIPLOMATICALLY REGARDLESS OF THE TYPE OF CONFLICT YOU ARE DEALING WITH, THERE ARE A FEW GENERAL RULES YOU SHOULD FOLLOW WHENEVER YOU ARE TRYING TO BRING HARMONY TO A VOLATILE SITUATION. HERE THEY ARE:

1) REFLECT YOUR UNDERSTANDING OF THE OTHER’S POSITION OR OF THE OTHER’S POSITION OR OPINION. SAY THINGS LIKE: OPINION. SAY THINGS LIKE: “I FEEL, I THINK, I WANT, ETC.” THIS SAYS, “I AM LISTENING TO YOUR OPINION AND I TAKE YOUR OPINION INTO ACCOUNT BEFORE I STATE MINE.”

2) LET THE OTHER PERSON KNOW THAT YOU VALUE HIM/HER AS A THAT YOU VALUE HIM/HER AS A PERSON EVEN THOUGH HIS/HER PERSON EVEN THOUGH HIS/HER OPINION IS DIFFERENT FROM OPINION IS DIFFERENT FROM YOURS. YOURS.

SAY THINGS LIKE: “I UNDERSTAND, APPRECIATE, RESPECT, SEE HOW YOU WOULD FEEL THAT WAY.”

THIS SAYS, “I HEAR YOU AND RESPECT YOUR OPINION.”

3) FINALLY, STATE YOUR POSITION OR OPINION. “I FEEL, THINK, WANT, ETC.” THIS SAYS, “I DON’T AGREE, BUT I VALUE YOU- SO LET’S EXCHANGE IDEAS COMFORTABLY, NOT AS A CONTEST FOR SUPERIORITY.”

THIS CONCLUDES YOUR DISTRICT LIONS CLUB TRAINING ON CONFLICT RESOLUTION. THANK YOU! THANK YOU!