How to Communicate with Practically Anyone: What Kind of Animal Are You? Cindi Reynolds Employee and Organizational Development

Workshop Objectives Identify ten secrets to increased communication. Identify barriers to effective communication. Identify your communication style with your strengths and improvement areas. Personal Objectives

Communication Activity The problem with communication... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. George Bernard Shaw

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Rapport –The ability to be in sync, to be fully present with someone –A critical part of rapport is attention –Includes nonverbal communication –Matching someone creates familiarity, comfort, and trust

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Authenticity –Being genuine, real and congruent –Integrity –Willing to communicate your truth as it exists in the moment

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Reflective Listening –Feedbacks the content and feeling of what has been expressed –Conveys understanding, acceptance and empathy

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Using “I” Messages –Taking responsibility or owning your experience –Not resorting to blame

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Self-Awareness –Be aware of your own feelings, values, needs, desires, and motives –Knowing yourself is critical

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Communication Withholds –A withhold is a consciously or unconsciously held thought or feeling –Needs to be communicated but withheld –Due to some uncomfortable emotional charge associated with the item in question –Periodic clearing sessions in regular intervals

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Empathy –Put yourself in someone else’s shoes –Seeing the world through the other person’s eyes –Ability to feel what someone else is experiencing and to validate their experience

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Giving and Receiving Feedback –Information about past behavior delivered in the present for the purpose of influencing future behavior –Build, maintain, or test relationship –Needs to be supportive and empowering –Without judgment and blame

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Ask for What You Want or Need –Asking for what you want or need is essential in the workplace –Know who to ask, and having a way to ask it is critical

Ten Secrets to Increase Understanding Synergy –The whole is greater than the sum of all the parts –Creative communication is contagious

Four Barriers to Effective Communication One Way Communication Poor Listening and Expressing Skills Stereotypes, Prejudices, Values, and Beliefs Fear of Ridicule, Embarrassment or Loss of Self Esteem

“The Lion” The Controller Action Oriented Decisive Problem Solver Direct Assertive Demanding Risk Taker Forceful Adventuresome Competitive Self-reliant Independent Determined Agitator Results Oriented

“The St. Bernard” The Organizer Patient Loyal Sympathetic Team Person Easy Going Deliberates Gentle Questionable Supportive Stabilizer Considerate Empathetic Persevering Trusting Congenial

“The Fox” The Analyzer Diplomatic Accurate Conscientious Fact Finder Systematic Logical Conventional Analytical Sensitive Emotionally Controlled Orderly Precise Self-disciplined Deliberate Cautious Decision Maker

“The Monkey” The Persuader Verbal Motivating Enthusiastic Outgoing Convincing Emotional Impulsive Generous Influential Humorous Socially Confident Inspiring Dramatic Optimistic Animated

“THE LION” Challenges Authority Power Freedom from Controls Options

“The Lion” DO’s of Communicating Be Specific, Be Clear, and Be Brief Stick to Business Provide Options and Probabilities Support Results Take Issue with Facts, not the Person Be Efficient

“The Lion” Don’ts of Communicating Waste Time Be Disorganized Have Ready Made Decision Focus on Personal Relationship Direct or Order Criticize Personally

“The St. Bernard” Harmony Security Appreciation To Provide Service Specific Tasks

“The St. Bernard” Do’s of Communicating Show Sincere Interest/Appreciation Be Patient, Listen Be Responsive Present your Case Softly, Non- Threateningly Clearly Define Individual Contributions Provide Guarantees Minimize Risks

“The St. Bernard” Don’ts of Communicating Rush into an Agenda Force Decisions Be Domineering, Demanding, Threatening Offer Guarantees You Cannot Fill Be Abrupt and Rapid

“The Fox” High Standards Detailed Explanations/Rules Perfection/Precision/Accuracy Quality and Systematic Controls To Avoid Confrontations Time to Make Decisions

“The Fox” Do’s of Communicating Thoroughly Prepare in Advance List Pros and Cons Present a Systematic Approach Provide Solid, Tangible Evidence Give them Time to Analyze and Verify Take Time but be Persistent

“The Fox” Don’ts of Communicating Be Disorganized Be Informal, Casual, or Loud Overstate or Oversell Provide Special Incentives Push for Decisions Put in a Position of Confrontation

“The Monkey” Recognition/Praise Free from Details With People/To Be Liked In Group Activities Making a Good Impression To Touch and Be Touched

“The Monkey” Do’s of Communicating Take Time to Socialize Support Dreams and Intuitions Ask for Opinions/Ideas Provide Testimonials from Important People Put Details in Writing Be Stimulating and Fast Moving

“The Monkey” Don’ts of Communicating Be Curt or Cold Leave Things Hanging Talk Down Argue