POWER STRUGGLES EFFECTIVE BEHAVIOR STRATEGIES Suzanne M. Rilling, M.Ed. Behavior Support Services

SCHOOL IS FOR ALL CHILDREN, INCLUDING THOSE WE FIND INCLUDING THOSE WE FIND UNATTRACTIVE OR HOSTILE, THOSE WHO MISBEHAVE AND THOSE WHO WHO MISBEHAVE AND THOSE WHO DON’T GIVE THEIR BEST DON’T GIVE THEIR BEST

MOST COMMON MOTIVATORS THAT DRIVE PEOPLE TO ATTACK RESPECT RESPECT BELONGING BELONGING POWER POWER

NECESSARY SKILLS FOR AN APPROACH TO DISCIPLINE CRISIS MANAGEMENT CRISIS MANAGEMENT SHORT-TERM STRATEGIES SHORT-TERM STRATEGIES LONG-TERM STRATEGIES LONG-TERM STRATEGIES

IDENTIFYING THE PROBLEM VERBAL DEFIANCE: YOU CAN’T MAKE ME! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME! YOU’RE NOT MY MOTHER! YOU’RE NOT MY MOTHER! SOOOOOO! SOOOOOO! NO! NO! WHY DO WE HAVE TO KNOW THAT? WHY DO WE HAVE TO KNOW THAT? THAT’S STUPID. THAT’S STUPID. THIS CLASS SUCKS! THIS CLASS SUCKS! MY DADDY SAYS_________. MY DADDY SAYS_________.

PREVENTIONS STRATEGIES GREET STUDENTS GREET STUDENTS CALL BY NAME CALL BY NAME KEEP ATTUNED TO THEIR NEEDS AND INTERESTS KEEP ATTUNED TO THEIR NEEDS AND INTERESTS USE THE 2 X 10 METHOD USE THE 2 X 10 METHOD CALL STUDENTS AT HOME CALL STUDENTS AT HOME GIVE OPPORTUNITIES FOR STUDENTS TO BE IN CHARGE GIVE OPPORTUNITIES FOR STUDENTS TO BE IN CHARGE BE RESPECTFUL OF DIFFERENCES IN LEARNING BE RESPECTFUL OF DIFFERENCES IN LEARNING

UNDERSTANDING THE HOSTILITY CYCLE Student – implulsive/refusal Teacher – feels attacked or personally disrespected (fight- flight) (Accepts the challenge) Student – Accepts challenge from hostile adult (increased rage) Teacher – Feels more threatened (More fight or flight) TEACHER REACTS BEHAVIOR ESCALATE S STUDENT ACTS OUT

REFRAMING 1. IDENTIFY A CHRONICALLY IRRITATING STUDENT 2. IDENTIFY THE PROBLEM BEHAVIOR 3. IDENTIFY POSITIVE ASPECTS AND BENEFITS OF THE BEHAVIOR 4. IMAGINE THE STUDENT IN FRONT OF YOU AND TRY TO EXPRESS THESE BENEFITS 5. IMPLEMENT THE STRATEGY WITH THE STUDENT

DEFUSING GOALS A. DIGNITY FOR THE STUDENT B. DIGNITY FOR YOURSELF C. KEEP THE STUDENT IN CLASS D. TEACH AN ALTERNATIVE TO AGGRESSION

DEFUSING SKILLS A. P.E.P. - PRIVACY, EYE-CONTACT, PROXIMITY B. NON-VERBAL C. L.A.A.D.- LISTENING, ACKNOWLEDGING, AGREEING, DEFERRING

ADDITIONAL STEPS STATE THE RULE AND CONSEQUENCE USING P.E.P. STATE THE RULE AND CONSEQUENCE USING P.E.P. IGNORE THE LAST HOOK IGNORE THE LAST HOOK USE AGREEING AND DEFER USE AGREEING AND DEFER TELL THERE’S A POWER STRUGGLE HAPPENING TELL THERE’S A POWER STRUGGLE HAPPENING OFFER THE DOOR OFFER THE DOOR GIVE TEMPORARY CONTROL GIVE TEMPORARY CONTROL DECIDE IF A CONSEQUENCE IS NECESSARY DECIDE IF A CONSEQUENCE IS NECESSARY

THE PRIVATE 3-STEP TECHNIQUE USE AN “I” MESSAGE USE AN “I” MESSAGE USE THE “WHAT HAVE I DONE?” USE THE “WHAT HAVE I DONE?” USE THE “PROBLEM SOLVING” USE THE “PROBLEM SOLVING”

STAY PERSONAL WITH THE STUDENT WIHOUT PERSONALIZING THE PROBLEM BEHAVIOR AND THEN STAND UP WITHOUT FIGHTING BACK.