Meeting the Challenge An Introduction to Understanding and Managing Behaviour Sue Byron

Objectives To increase awareness and understanding of: the reasons why children and young people display challenging behaviour the skills and techniques for promoting positive behaviour

Some children and young people don’t have the underlying skills to behave well They often present with: poor social skills a lack of empathy poor self control oppositional behaviour aggressive behaviour

Discussion What challenges do you face? What situations cause them?

Why do children misbehave? Someone or something else has upset them Someone or something else has upset them Change in routine Change in routine Being in pain/unwell Being in pain/unwell Being unable to communicate a need Being unable to communicate a need Change or withdrawal of medication Change or withdrawal of medication Environmental factors Environmental factors Learned behaviour Learned behaviour

Why do children misbehave? Factors in the home environment: Socio-economic background Socio-economic background Family background and make-up Family background and make-up Parenting style Parenting style Attachment difficulties Attachment difficulties

Why do children misbehave? Factors individual to the child or developmental issues such as: Factors individual to the child or developmental issues such as: Speech and Language Disorder Speech and Language Disorder Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder (AD(H)D) Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder (AD(H)D) Autistic Spectrum Disorder Autistic Spectrum Disorder

Other factors Sleep Deprivation Sleep Deprivation Up to two thirds of children in the UK do not get enough sleep. This may harm neurological development and can contribute to behavioural problems including attention deficit hyperactivity disorder Diet Diet Studies have demonstrated links between diet attention span, irritability, fatigue and the ability to achieve Influence of the media Influence of the media

‘All behaviour reflects an underlying need and has a purpose’ ‘All behaviour reflects an underlying need and has a purpose’ Why do some children misbehave?

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Attachment Theory Attachment: Is the connection established from birth between baby and mother/carer Is the connection established from birth between baby and mother/carer Affects the way the brain develops Affects the way the brain develops Underpins a child’s ability to develop emotionally, socially and academically Underpins a child’s ability to develop emotionally, socially and academically

Securely attached children Emotionally secure Emotionally secure Self confident Self confident Good social skills Good social skills Display empathy Display empathy Seek help when experiencing difficulties Seek help when experiencing difficulties Better able to learn Better able to learn

Insecurely attached children Low self esteem Low self esteem Insecure Insecure Withdrawn Withdrawn Attention seeking Attention seeking Clingy Clingy Anti-social Anti-social Hostile Hostile Aggressive Aggressive

Healthy Neglected Healthy Neglected

What can we do? 5 ways to promote positive behaviour

Develop good relationships Get to know them Get to know them Demonstrate that you value them Demonstrate that you value them Listen to them Listen to them Use humour Use humour Show respect Show respect Be a role model Be a role model

Establish good routines Make your expectations clear but realistic Make your expectations clear but realistic Allow scope for planned change Allow scope for planned change Firm boundaries Firm boundaries Remind, rehearse and reinforce Remind, rehearse and reinforce Be well-planned and well- prepared Be well-planned and well- prepared

Catch them being good! Let them know what you expect Let them know what you expect notice the behaviour you want notice the behaviour you want reward it! reward it!

A word about praise Praise is the easiest reward to give Praise is the easiest reward to give It should be specific and genuine It should be specific and genuine It can be verbal and non-verbal It can be verbal and non-verbal Could be given for effort or intention as well as achievement Could be given for effort or intention as well as achievement It develops self-esteem It develops self-esteem

A word about sanctions Sanctions alone will never change behaviour Sanctions don’t teach you what to do instead Need to be consistently applied Need to be relevant, proportionate and followed through The best sanctions have a restorative element

Use positive language Say what you want not what you don’t want Offer positive feedback Say ‘thank you’ instead of ‘please’ Use the language of choice

Be consistent Follow up on issues that count Follow up on issues that count Work to the agreed rules Work to the agreed rules Apply reward and sanctions consistently Apply reward and sanctions consistently Stick to your guns when you’ve made a decision or promised something Stick to your guns when you’ve made a decision or promised something It’s not the severity of the reward or the consequence that is important but the certainty that it will happen! It’s not the severity of the reward or the consequence that is important but the certainty that it will happen!

Dealing with more challenging behaviour ‘ Behavioural research on conditioning affirms that what most adults do impulsively when they respond to misbehaviour is incorrect’ Sweeney (1975)

Six stages of a crisis from Team Teach Stage 1 Stage 2 Stage 3 Stage 4 Stage 5 Stage 6 Anxiety levels raised Escalation of feelings Crisis Recovery Depression Follow up Time

Unhelpful responses Moving into personal or intimate body space Use of body size or height to intimidate Straight forward, front on body stance Arms crossed Unrelenting eye contact Fist shaking or clenched Finger pointing

Helpful responses Maintain social distance Sideways stance, step back Intermittent eye contact Relaxed body posture Open hands and arms

Distract! Defuse! De-escalate!

Distract Engage in conversation Involve them in another activity Give them a job Send them on an errand

Defuse and de-escalate Remind of desired behaviours Give choices and options Remind of rules and consequences Give take up time-allow time to think-gives you thinking time

Avoid Subjective judgements or comments Displaying irritation or anger Over talking Forcing them to lose face in front of peers A stand-off “Do it or else” Making promises you can’t keep

Good luck and thank you for listening Sue Byron Primary Behaviour Service