Forestdale Inc. Fathering Initiative Father/Male Accountability “Looking For More Than Just A Few Good Men” Presented by: Howard L. Wheeler

Objectives Provide an overview of the Forestdale Fathering Initiative philosophy and services offered. Analyze the disease of family violence; symptoms and effects on the family system. Identify personal barriers of father/males to change abusive behaviors perpetrated. Identify immediate benefits to fathers/males who choose to change abusive behaviors. During presentation exchange thoughts, ideas, insights and necessary actions needed to eliminate the disease of family violence.

Program Outcome Objective Improve non-custodial father engagement with children. Improve father support with children.

Forestdale Fathering Initiative Services Offered: Parenting Skills – “Foundation” - 24 sessions Anger Management – 12 Sessions Male Accountability Program – 12 sessions World of Work – Job Readiness – 12 sessions Supervised Visitation

Program Philosophy Who Am I

Disease of Family Violence What is a disease? In human beings, "disease" is often used more broadly to refer to any condition that causes extreme pain, dysfunction, distress, social problems, and/or death to the person afflicted, or similar problems for those in contact with the person.pain dysfunctiondistresssocial problemsdeath

Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abusive Father/Man Shows extreme jealousy and wants to keep the woman isolated. Has an inability to cope with stress and shows a lack of impulse control. (This may not Necessarily appear outside the home) Has a poor self-image and blames others for problems. Shows severe mood swings. May have a history of abuse in his own family and may have been abusive in courtship. Presents a history of personal and/or family discord; unemployment, cruelty to animals, abuse of alcohol or other substances, and other unexplained behavior.

Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abused Spouse/Intimate Partner Shows guilt, ambivalence, and fear over living conditions. Feels isolated and untrusting of others, even though she may be involved in the community. Is emotionally and economically dependent. Has a poor self-concept (this may not have been true BEFORE the relationship). Has observed other women in her family being abused or may have been abused as a child. Feels angry, embarrassed, and ashamed. Is fearful of being insane. Has learned to feel helpless and feels powerless. Has unexplained injuries that may go untreated.

Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abused Child/Children Higher levels of aggression, anger and hostility “Acting out” Oppositional behavior and disobedience Fear and anxiety Withdrawal Depression Changes in sleeping patterns Changes in eating patterns Poor peer, sibling and social relationships Low self-esteem

Barriers To Change Denial Habitual Blaming Behavior. Trust Issues. General Inability to look at “self”.

Male Accountability Program Program Focus: Responsibility and Accountability Acceptance of Abuse. Forgiveness – Make amends when appropriate. Pro-activity vs. Reactivity. Take Necessary Risks for Change.

Male Accountability Program 8 Themes of Curriculum Non-Violence Non-threatening behavior Respect Support and Trust Accountability and Honesty Sexual Respect Partnership Negotiation and Fairness

Who Refers To The Male Accountability Program Domestic Violence Court Family Court Faith Institutions NYC Children’s Services Dept of Juvenile Justice

Benefits of Change Reduced feelings of shame and guilt. Improved self-confidence and purpose. Health respect for self and others.

Forestdale Inc. Anistiss Agnew Executive Director Forestdale Fathering Initiative Scott Leach Administrative Director th Street Forest Hills, N.Y (718)