TRANSITIONING TO COLLEGE: TRANSITIONING TO COLLEGE: Fostering Independence & Success By Emily Smith

Congratulations! You should be so proud of the job you have done to prepare your student (and yourself) for the transitions that lie ahead. Parenting a college student can be exciting, frustrating, rewarding, anxiety producing, fulfilling, and traumatic!

“No One Told Me”

How to Differentiate College from High School It is not more of the same New Stage New Type of Education New Experiences New Expectations Accept that the current home routine is not going to continue Letting go is a more gradual experience. This can make it more difficult.

Separation and Change for Parents and Students Recognize that it is going to feel uncomfortable not being their primary caretaker and protector. Young adults must make their own decisions. Harder to reinvent yourself in your hometown Parents need to redirect their time and energy Communication is Key Requires an adjustment on parents, student and the whole family Respect student’s privacy Guide rather than pressure College students need to pursue their own passions Be a safe person to come to

Promoting Independence Treat them like adults. Don’t let them become insulated by the home environment. Remember that they are juggling home and school lives. Keep in mind that they’re going through one of the most dramatic changes in their life. It will take a semester for them to understand the flow of work and how to accommodate different teachers standards and course requirements. It takes time to understand the rhythm of a new academic life and for students to develop a personal learning/studying style. Some disappointments and/or surprises are not unusual.

Living at Home During College : What are the Boundaries? Dont’s D ecider-in-Chief should, can and must be over. D on’t pick your student’s courses. D o not pressure him or her to major too early or to pick a field solely for its job prospects. D on’t edit your student’s papers. D on’t panic too soon. N ever call the teacher, department chair, academic counselor or dean. Do’s E ncourage your student to go see their instructors. P rotect the last month of the semester. 70% of the course grade is awarded in the last month of the semester. D irect your student to appropriate campus resources. R emind them of services available free of charge. E ncourage them to stick it out. E ncourage them to spend as much time as possible on campus.

College vs. High School High School : Guiding Principle Students will usually be told what their responsibilitie s are and corrected if their behavior is out of line. College : Guiding Principle Students are old enough to take responsibility for what they do and what they don ’ t do and understand that each decision has a consequence.

Recommended Reading Letting Go: A Parent’s Guide to Understanding the College Years by Karen Levin Coburn & Madge Lawrence Treeger When Your Kid Goes to College by Carol Barkin Almost Grown: Launching Your Child from High School to College by Patricia Pasick Don’t Tell Me What To Do, Just Send Money: The Essential Parenting Guide to the College Years by Helen E. Johnson & Christine Schelhas-Miller Campus Daze by George Gibbs The College Guide for Parents by Charles Shield (Published by College Board) College Parents Learn to Survive the First Year by Steve Gladis

Thank you for Listening! Good Luck and Have Fun!