Building Strong Families Parenting Skills Building Strong Families

Parenting Skills Parenting skills do not always come naturally or easily. Parenting is a learning process that occurs each day. Parents have to work at it. Parents must understand and meet children’s needs

Children’s Needs Physical- food, clothing, shelter, health and safety. Emotional and Social feeling safe, loved, cared for learn how to make friends and work with others Intellectual- stimulation, opportunity to learn, and become educated

Deprivation A lack of the critical needs and encouraging environment that are essential for physical, emotional, and intellectual well-being. Children may fall behind other children their own age in their overall development.

Parenting Styles How parents and other caregivers care for and discipline children. No one parenting style is right or wrong You pick the style that works with your personality and for your child

Parenting Styles Authoritarian The parent believes the child should obey them without question. The parent tells a child what to do and it’s the child’s responsibility to do it. When rules are broken, the parent responds quickly and firmly.

Parenting Styles Assertive-Democratic Children have more input into the rules and limits of the home. Learning to take responsibility is important- children are given a certain amount of freedom and independence within the rules. When rules are broken- learn best from accepting the results of their actions Work together to find an acceptable punishment.

Parenting Style Permissive Parents give children a wide range of freedom. Children may set their own rules Parents ignore rule breaking

Guide Children’s Behavior Guidance- using firmness and understanding to help children learn how to behave Outcome of Effective Guidance To learn self-discipline (ability to control one’s own behavior.) Get along with others & how to deal with their feelings in acceptable ways. Promotes security and positive self-esteem The difference between right and wrong Develop a conscience

Encourage Appropriate Behavior Be a Role Model Give Effective Direction Set Limits

Be A Role Model Children learn best by being shown what to do, rather than just being told what to do. Parents need to demonstrate at all times the behavior they would like to see in their own children.

Give Effective Direction Be sure you have the child’s attention. Be polite. Use positive statements. Use specific words that the child can understand. Begin with an action verb Give a limited number of directions at a time Be clear. Give praise and love

Set Limits Children need limits to grow into responsible adults. Limits should keep children from hurting themselves, other people, or property. Children will respect and follow guidelines if they are reasonable. Parents need to be consistent in enforcing limits

Determining Limits Ask Yourself: Does the limit allow the child to learn, explore, and grow? Is the limit fair and appropriate for the child’s age? Does the limit benefit the child, or is it just for the adult’s convenience?

PARENTING REVIEW: What is deprivation? A lack of the critical needs and encouraging environment that are essential for physical, emotional, and intellectual well-being. How does deprivation affect children? Children may fall behind other children their own age in their overall development.

PARENTING REVIEW: What are the 3 types of Parenting Styles? Authoritarian Assertive-Democratic Permissive

PARENTING REVIEW: What are the 3 ways you can encourage appropriate behavior? Be a Role Model Give Effective Directions Set Limits

Set Limits Review Limits must be stated simply, briefly, and in a calm, direct tone. Be clear. Firmly and consistently enforced Limits may often need to be repeated or explained in another way. Redirection is important. It suggests that the child does something else

Responding to Misbehavior Is the expected behavior appropriate, given the child’s age and development? Does the child understand that the behavior was wrong? Did the child do the behavior knowingly and deliberately, or was it beyond the child’s control?

Effective Punishment Correct behavior is important and there are consequences for poor choices. THE MESSAGE: Parents should clearly show they disapprove of the behavior but they still love the child. Warnings are okay.

Positive Reinforcement A response that encourages a particular behavior. When children learn that an action wins attention and approval from adults, they are likely to repeat that actions.

Positive Reinforcement Be specific Comment on the behavior as soon as possible. Recognize small steps. Help children take pride in their actions. Tailor the encouragement to the needs of the child. Use positive reinforcement wisely

Negative Reinforcement A response aimed at strengthening desired behavior by removing an unpleasant trigger.

Negative Reinforcement Natural Consequences Children suffer from the actual result of their action. Parents do not lecture Logical Consequences Connected to the misbehavior Parents need to follow through

Negative Reinforcement Loss of Privileges Take away a privilege Appropriate for 5 or older Time Out A short period in which a child sits away from other people and the center of activity. Not their room

Poor Disciplinary Measures Bribing Making Children to Behave Shouting or Yelling Shaming or belittling Threatening to Withhold Love Exaggerating Consequences

Consistency in Guidance Being consistent, or continually the same, is key to guiding children’s behavior. Helps children know what is expected of them and the expected discipline. Children lose trust and confidence in the caregiver who constantly change rules or fail to enforce rules in a consistent way.