The Night Before Christmas – Physics Style Warren Puckett CHHS Physics

Twas ……. Twas the night before the Physics Christmas, When all through the lab Not a electron was stirring, Not even a Had – (dron) The plasma tubes were placed by the generator with care In hopes that the Stephen Hawkings soon would be there.

The lab coats were hung by the fume hood, just in case The thermodynamics lab blew up in your face. Circuits and motherboards with many an amp Gave shocking awareness that you could be A ’ - zapped.

The crash carts were nestled all sung in their drawers While visions of collisions danced round on the board. And my server and I, in my old Navy hat Had just settled in for some restful REM naps.

When out by the rocket launcher there arose such a clatter I sprang from my nail bed to see what ’ s – a --New Matter Away to the spectrometer I flew like a bat With aerodynamics controlling what I aim at.

The bright moon in its orbit made everything clear That a funny ole nerd was soon coming here. More rapid than sun spots, his brightness appeared More watts than a light bulb, I had a welder ’ s hat near.

Now Calcium, now Einsteinium, now Cobalt and Iron On Chlorine, On Neon, On Krypton and Gold To the top of the spectrum, to the top of the flame Now Quantum Leap, Quantum Leap, Quantum Leap All !

He stretched so thin to come down the chimney, I knew in a minute he controlled relativity. The presents he left produced great conversations, Just as surely as the laws of matter conservation.

His eyes were so tiny behind the big ole thick lenses And his cheeks were so rosy with thermodynamics He danced with a jig and a happy little whistle As he planted the presents among the cold winter thistle.

Then his job all completed, and his clothes looking needy He sprang up the chimney with a hot martini, And in a twinkling of a decibel, with the sound of harmonics The atoms all started to sing, Merry Physics Christmas to all and to all a good night.