Strong Student Sample ITW essay Prompt: What is Callarman’s argument, and to what extent do you agree with him? Use support from the text.

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Presentation transcript:

Strong Student Sample ITW essay Prompt: What is Callarman’s argument, and to what extent do you agree with him? Use support from the text.

TITLE: The Black Sheep

INTRO #1: HTBT? (HOOK) Throughout the world, there will always be people who just do not quite fit in with the rest of society. (TOPIC/BKGD) Although these people may not necessarily be crazy or insane it is more likely that they share in different ideas as how to live their lives. (THESIS) Personally, I do not agree with Shawn Callerman’s opinion that Chris McCandless lacked common sense and that he was “just plain crazy” because the critic did not fully understand McCandless’ motivations.

BODY (TS) 1.Sean Callarman feels that people should easily conform to society. (Topic?) 2.However, the main beliefs of transcendentalists centered on one’s ability to transcend beyond normal, every day life and find something supernatural in things that others may not be able to see. (Transition? + Topic?)

BODY (TS) 1.Sean Callarman feels that people should easily conform to society. (Topic?) 2.However, the main beliefs of transcendentalists centered on one’s ability to transcend beyond normal, every day life and find something supernatural in things that others may not be able to see. (Transition? + Topic?)

BODY Sean Callarman feels that people should easily conform to society. A person is expected to live by certain standards and obey such laws that s/he did not put forth in the first place. It is easy to see why Chris would leave everything behind in search of a better person inside himself as well as a calm, non- controlling way of life. Furthermore, McCandless was someone who did not believe in owning much, as he “burned his last remaining cash…decided to bury most of his worldly possessions in the parched earth” (Krakauer 4). In doing so he was able to escape the controlling hand of society and become a stronger person. I believe that in many ways, Chris has more common sense than many and to be able to do what he did takes more than just courage; it takes knowledge. This proves that he had valued education and life learning.

INTRO #2 (What’s the correct order?) A.Chris McCandless was a very adventurous and bright man, but his actions got him killed. This made people question his mentality and motives for his Alaskan trip. B.I kindly disagree with Shaun Callarman because although Chris made idiotic mistakes and was overly confident, he was not mentally crazy. C.Too much passion can get misinterpreted at times.

INTRO #2 (correct order: (CAB) Too much passion can get misinterpreted at times. Chris McCandless was a very adventurous and bright man, but his actions got him killed. This made people question his mentality and motives for his Alaskan trip. I kindly disagree with Shaun Callarman because although Chris made idiotic mistakes and was overly confident, he was not mentally crazy.

CONCLUSION (RSE  What’s the order?) A.There will always be someone to woefully stray from the flock of sheep we call society, and when that time comes, he might be eaten by the wolf. B.I do not in any way agree with the profound statement that Chris McCandless was crazy or lacked common sense. C. People in this world need to look introspectively and see if they are really happy, no matter what society deems appropriate.

CONCLUSION (BAC) I do not in any way agree with the profound statement that Chris McCandless was crazy or lacked common sense. There will always be someone to woefully stray from the flock of sheep we call society, and when that time comes, he might be eaten by the wolf. People in this world need to look introspectively and see if they are really happy, no matter what society deems appropriate.