Conflict Resolution – Skills for Life

Sources of Conflict Resources Resources Priorities/strategies Priorities/strategies Decisions Decisions Goals, productivity Goals, productivity Roles Roles Rewards Rewards Values, beliefs, attitudes Values, beliefs, attitudes Power Power Leadership style Leadership style Inclusion Inclusion Personality Personality

Destructive Aspects of Conflict Destroys individual and team morale Destroys individual and team morale Diverts energy away from more important activities/issues Diverts energy away from more important activities/issues Relationships are weakened Relationships are weakened Teams become polarized Teams become polarized The problem keeps persisting The problem keeps persisting

Constructive Aspects of Conflict People change & grow People change & grow Problems are solved Problems are solved Involvement and commitment is increased Involvement and commitment is increased Relationships are strengthened Relationships are strengthened Teams become more cohesive Teams become more cohesive Team creativity is enhanced Team creativity is enhanced

Five Conflict Handling Modes

Avoiding Uncooperative and Unassertive Uncooperative and Unassertive Goal is “to delay” Goal is “to delay” Postpone or sidestep the issue Postpone or sidestep the issue Don’t address the conflict Don’t address the conflict Withdrawing, ignoring or not taking a position stance Withdrawing, ignoring or not taking a position stance May lead to Lose/Lose May lead to Lose/Lose

Avoiding is applicable when… We feel conflict is trivial We feel conflict is trivial There’s no chance of satisfying our needs/concerns There’s no chance of satisfying our needs/concerns Time is needed for cooling down Time is needed for cooling down Gathering more information outweighs need for instant decision Gathering more information outweighs need for instant decision Others can resolve it more effectively Others can resolve it more effectively

Accommodating Cooperative but Unassertive Cooperative but Unassertive Goal is “to yield” Goal is “to yield” Selfless generosity Selfless generosity Going along with, even though you disagree Going along with, even though you disagree Yielding to another’s point of view Yielding to another’s point of view May lead to Lose/Win May lead to Lose/Win

Accommodating is applicable when… You realize your wrong You realize your wrong Issue is more important to other side Issue is more important to other side Build up social credits Build up social credits You’re outmatched and losing You’re outmatched and losing Preserving harmony is more important Preserving harmony is more important Aids in an employee’s development Aids in an employee’s development

Competing Assertive but not Cooperative Assertive but not Cooperative Goal is “to win” Goal is “to win” Tough but not considerate Tough but not considerate Standing up for one’s rights Standing up for one’s rights Simply trying to win Simply trying to win May lead to Win/Lose May lead to Win/Lose

Competing is applicable when… During emergencies, must act quickly During emergencies, must act quickly Unpopular course of action must be taken (enforcing rules, disciplining, cost cutting) Unpopular course of action must be taken (enforcing rules, disciplining, cost cutting) Issue is important—you know you’re right Issue is important—you know you’re right Need to protect yourself Need to protect yourself

Compromising Kind of Assertive and Cooperative Kind of Assertive and Cooperative Goal is “to find middle ground” Goal is “to find middle ground” Splitting the difference Splitting the difference Exchanging concessions Exchanging concessions Finding a quick or expedient solution Finding a quick or expedient solution May lead to “Half Win-Half Lose” May lead to “Half Win-Half Lose”

Compromising is applicable when… Goals are moderately important—not worth the effort to be more assertive Goals are moderately important—not worth the effort to be more assertive Both sides have equal power Both sides have equal power A temporary settlement is desirable A temporary settlement is desirable Under time pressure for a solution Under time pressure for a solution Need a backup—competing or collaborating isn’t working Need a backup—competing or collaborating isn’t working

Collaborating Assertive and Cooperative Assertive and Cooperative Goal is “to find a win-win solution” Goal is “to find a win-win solution” Being tough yet considerate Being tough yet considerate Concern for the goal and the relationship Concern for the goal and the relationship Both parties needs are met Both parties needs are met Leads to Win/Win or Win/Win—No Deal Leads to Win/Win or Win/Win—No Deal

Collaborating contd… Collaboration requires different perspective: Collaboration requires different perspective: –Accept responsibility for our part of conflict –No “hidden agendas” –Respect for other’s viewpoints/perspectives –Desire to see needs/concerns of both parties being met –Looking for opportunities to enlarge the pie- -accommodate all needs and concerns –Thinking Win/Win or Win/Win-No Deal

Collaborating is applicable when… Merge insights from people with different perspectives Merge insights from people with different perspectives Need to work through hard feelings Need to work through hard feelings Want to improve/maintain relationship Want to improve/maintain relationship Concerns/needs are too important to compromise or accommodate away Concerns/needs are too important to compromise or accommodate away Need to have buy in Need to have buy in

Conflict Management Guidelines Decide if conflict is worth confronting Decide if conflict is worth confronting Select a “prime time” for resolving Select a “prime time” for resolving Use active listening Use active listening Ask questions to understand Ask questions to understand Ability to clearly express concerns/needs Ability to clearly express concerns/needs Make point to keep emotions out of it Make point to keep emotions out of it Stick to the issues Stick to the issues Stick to the present Stick to the present

A Conflict Management Strategy Initiate discussion in a non-defensive way Initiate discussion in a non-defensive way Briefly define the problem (ID specifics) Briefly define the problem (ID specifics) Ask for their perspective Ask for their perspective Ask to share your perspective--if OK share it Ask to share your perspective--if OK share it Agree to causes, ask for commitment to solve it Agree to causes, ask for commitment to solve it Generate feasible solutions Generate feasible solutions Select a mutually acceptable solution Select a mutually acceptable solution Plan the implementation & then follow-up Plan the implementation & then follow-up

Role play #1 Randy is the supervisor Randy is the supervisor Carzella is a long term high producing employee that likes to share her life’s story with co-workers every morning Carzella is a long term high producing employee that likes to share her life’s story with co-workers every morning Steve and Dave are co-workers Steve and Dave are co-workers

Role Play #2 Steve is a member of a HPT Steve is a member of a HPT Carzella is the office manager Carzella is the office manager Steve’s team members have a habit of taking files out of the cabinets and not replacing them Steve’s team members have a habit of taking files out of the cabinets and not replacing them One day some LT members come in looking for a case file when Carzella’s out of the office. One day some LT members come in looking for a case file when Carzella’s out of the office.