WELCOME Dealing with Lying and Stealing Center for Development of Human Services Institute for Community Health Promotion Buffalo State © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Center for Development of Human Services Institute for Community Health Promotion SUNY Buffalo State _______________________________________ Acknowledgement This material was developed by the Center for Development of Human Services (CDHS), Institute for Community Health Promotion, SUNY Buffalo State under a training and administrative services agreement with the New York State Office of Children and Family Services. Disclaimer While every effort has been made to provide accurate and complete information, the Office of Children and Family Services and the State of New York assume no responsibility for any errors or omissions in the information provided herein and make no representations or warranties about the suitability of the information contained here for any purpose. All information and documents are provided “as is,” without a warranty of any kind. For information about this and other training programs, please visit: © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

An Overview of Human Sexuality Center for Development of Human Services Buffalo State College NYS Office of Children & Family Services © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Expectations © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Outcomes Clarify values regarding lying and stealing Identify reasons children lie and/or steal Respond appropriately to children who lie and/or steal Make plans to prevent lying and stealing behaviors © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

To Tell the Truth… Warm-up © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Definition: Lying Making an untrue statement with intent to deceive Creating a false or misleading impression © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Reasons Adults Become Upset : © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Typical Reactions to Lying & Stealing © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

The Best Lie Ever Told… By a politician In an advertisement To a police officer for speeding By a child in care By someone in this group © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Reasons People Lie and/or Steal © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Cycle of Need EXPRESSION RESPONSE RELAXATION NEED © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Cycle of Mistrust EXPRESSION RESPONSE DISTRESS NEED © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Tricks, Lies and Parenting “Your room is a mess. Turn off the TV now and go clean it up!” © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services

Did you clean your room? Yep! Liar! Don’t tell me you cleaned your room. I just walked by and its still a pig pen! Why lie to me? I hate that! © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.

Where have you been? At Jimmy’s. No, you weren’t! I spoke with his mom and she hasn’t seen you all day. You’re grounded! Don’t you EVER lie to me again!! © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.

I need to have a talk with you. Huh? About what? Well, you said you were going to Jimmy’s and I know you didn’t. Its important to me to be able to trust you. What’s going on? © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.

It Takes a Thief What did you take? What were the circumstances? What motivated you to take it? What did you gain? Who was affected by what you did? What did you feel before/ during/after? What were the consequences? © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.

PROS AND CONS OF STEALING © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.

Goals of Discipline Complete the Cycle of Need Learn healthy ways to meet needs Feel good about relationships with others Build self-esteem © 2014 New York State Office of Children and Family Services.