ELEMENTARY SCHOOL SUCCESS Joanne Lynch Blaney School Counselor

What is Success? Definition –To prosper –To thrive –To achieve “To come through with flying colors.” “To earn one’s wings.”

What is Success for an Elementary School Age Child? A successful child - is eager to try new things - appears happy and content - demonstrates positive self-esteem - enjoys friendships - recognizes his/her achievements - is interested in learning

The Keys to Success Parents are the keys to their children’s success in school!

PARENTS P = Physical Care A = Academic Pursuits R = Resiliency E = Esteem N = Nurture T = Time Out S = Social Skills

P = Physical Care Maslow’s Hierarchy of Basic Needs SELF-ACTUALIZATION SELF-ESTEEM BELONGING & LOVE SAFETY PHYSICAL

P = PHYSICAL CARE “A family is a safe island.” “Inner security is born at home.” Dr. M. Scott Peck - Sleep -Nutrition - Exercise -Limits -Balance

A = ACADEMIC PURSUITS Successful Children Enjoy Learning. -Create a study environment - Provide materials - Emphasize the importance of learning - School involvement - Limit TV and other electronics - Focus on strengths - praise effort - Set high expectations

R = RESILIENCY “Flexibility is the hallmark of a survivor personality.” Al Siebert - Coping Skills & Stress - Problems are temporary, specific, & impersonal - Develop workable plans - OPTIMISM

E = ESTEEM Components of self-esteem 1. Basic Worth: I am loveable. 2. Competence: I am capable.

E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth “The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves.” Thomas Merton Basic Worth affects: - how a child feels about himself - how a child views the world - the choices that a child makes in life

E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth Parents can help raise their child’s sense of self-worth by: -The generous use of positive feedback - Be specific - Be sincere - Go public! -Listen and communicate - Be attentive - Be respectful

E = ESTEEM: Competence Successful children have an “I can do”Attitude! Competence is effective when it has expectations that are: - Reasonable - Age Appropriate

N = NURTURE Definition: - to care - to guide - to comfort - to nourish - to cherish - to “parent”

N = NURTURE Children who are successful in school have parents who nurture them. - Establish Family Traditions - Dinner time = Conversations - New Experiences - Family Values and Beliefs

T = TIME OUT Discipline and Punishment - Discipline is not punishment. - Punishment is what we do to control our children. - Discipline is how we teach our children to control themselves.

T = TIME OUT Effective Discipline - Focuses on the Behavior - Age Appropriate Behaviors = Consequences Consequences: - Clear - Respectful - Firm - Consistent - Reasonable

S = SOCIAL SKILLS “Children with good social and problem solving skills make new friends. They are comfortable in new situations.” Martin Seligman Social Competence is necessary for success in today’s world.

S = SOCIAL SKILLS Social Competence means developing Interpersonal Skills - Skill of Initiating - Skill of Assertiveness - Skill of Listening - Skill of Cooperating - Skill of Negotiating

S = SOCIAL SKILLS Interpersonal Skills - Initiating: Greeting others - Assertiveness: “I- messages” Passive Assertive Aggressive Me Others Me Others Me Others

S = SOCIAL SKILLS Interpersonal Skills (con’t) - Listening: Attentiveness - Cooperating: Sharing, Cooperation Cooperation vs. Competition - Negotiating: Win/Win, Forgiveness

CONCLUSION “Nothing will help children succeed in schools more than parents who provide a safe and loving environment and take care of their children’s physical and emotional needs.” Staff writer from Barrow Journal

RESOURCES