Emotional and Social Intelligence for Leaders Creating Powerful Connections and Sustaining Effectiveness

IQ and technical skills are important but Emotional Intelligence is the sine qua non of leadership

The EI Story In 1990, Mayer and Salovy developed the first theory of EI In 1995, Goleman proposed that emotional intelligence was integral to life success In 2001, neuroscience literature supports theories of EI – lending credibility In 2002, “Primal Leadership” defined leadership competencies In 2008, it became common for organizations to have EI competency models to evaluate leaders

Harvard Business Review Articles What makes a leader? (Nov/Dec 1998) What makes a leader? (Nov/Dec 1998) Leadership that gets results (Mar/Apr 2000) Leadership that gets results (Mar/Apr 2000) Primal leadership: The hidden driver of great performance (Dec 2001) Primal leadership: The hidden driver of great performance (Dec 2001) Reawakening your passion for work (Apr 2002) Reawakening your passion for work (Apr 2002) What makes a leader? (Jan 2004) What makes a leader? (Jan 2004) Leading by feel (Jan 2004) Leading by feel (Jan 2004) Social Intelligence and the Biology of Leadership (Sep 2008) Social Intelligence and the Biology of Leadership (Sep 2008)

Harvard Business Review Articles Primal leadership: The hidden driver of great performance (Dec 2001) Primal leadership: The hidden driver of great performance (Dec 2001) Reawakening your passion for work (Apr 2002) Reawakening your passion for work (Apr 2002) Social Intelligence and the Biology of Leadership (Sep 2008) Social Intelligence and the Biology of Leadership (Sep 2008)

Is Emotional Intelligence (EI) …? A set of skills A bag of tricks A way of being in a relationship with others A set of beliefs, values, principles Biologically determined Respect for human goodness A belief of people’s ability to grow and change

Exercise Think of a leader with whom you worked – one that brought out the best in you and one that you would gladly work with, and for, again. When you were around them, what did they say or do? What feelings, thoughts, and behaviors did they invite out in you and others?

How do you suppose some leaders are emotionally and socially intelligent while others are not?

The good news! Emotional and social intelligence can be cultivated and grown over a lifetime. Does anyone believe that the above is not true?

Masterful Leadership Begins with Emotional Intelligence

Self-Awareness Are you aware of how your body, mind, emotions, and spirit influence each other through the course of the day? What practices do you employ to calm yourself, pause, and reflect when you are unsettled? Attention is one of our most valuable resources; yet we seldom pay attention to how we pay attention. Why do you think the latter is true? When did a shift in attention result in breakthrough thinking for you or your team? Why do you choose to lead? What is your management code?

Self-Management What situations, stressors, feelings, assumptions, filters, or work/lifestyle choices challenge your ability to exercise self-control? When you get tense, what is your default program? How does it serve you well? How does it work against you and others? What happens when we don’t take time for renewal and reflection?

Leadership Myth Your mood does not matter The Truth Emotions are contagious and a leader can create resonance and a climate that supports success or can spread emotions that create a dissonant, unproductive, and unhealthy climate.

Leadership Myth Great leaders thrive on constant pressure The Truth Sacrifice and power stress are inherent in the leader’s role. The best leaders manage the pressure through adopting practices of renewal.

The Sacrifice Syndrome Blood pressure increases Large muscles prepare to fight or run Brain shuts down non- essential neural circuits Less open, flexible and creative Hormones activated: CORTICOSTEROIDS Leads to reduction in healthy immune system Inhibits creation of new neurons Over stimulates older neurons leading to shrinkage of neurons RESULTS: Brain loses capability to learn We feel anxious, nervous, even depressed Perceive things people say or do as threatening and negative More stress is aroused Stress arouses the SYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM The sacrifice of being a leader causes STRESS Hormones activated: EPINEPHRINE & NOREPINEPHRINE © Richard E. Boyatzis and Annie McKee, 2005.

Renewal: Engaging the parasympathetic nervous system Wanting to understand, care for another person, and to initiate some action contributing to their well-being Neural circuit activated: limbic system to the left pre-frontal cortex Aroused compassion Release of oxytocin & vasopressin Adrenal-pituitary axis activated; arousal of the PSNS Feeling hopeful, optimistic, at peace or exciting but look forward to the future Systolic & diastolic blood pressure decreased Increased secretion of immunoglobulin A and natural killer cells © Richard E. Boyatzis and Annie McKee, 2005.

Social Awareness How are you trustworthy? How have you been untrustworthy? How do you let your staff know you care? What feedback have you received from your staff that indicates you exhibit caring behavior? What feedback have you received that indicates some see you as not “caring” about them as a human being? How do you provide stability for those you lead? Do your staff know what your guiding principles/values are? Are you consistent? Do you have a compelling vision that sustains staff through difficult times?

Relationship Management “What we accomplish in organizations, is accomplished through others.” ~ Jane Dutton What enables people to give the very best of themselves? How does your language reflect how you see yourself, others, and the world? How do we engage everyone without becoming paralyzed by endless process? What simple touches have you used or could you use to bring more life into your workplace? How much time, each week, do you devote to relationship development?

Do you believe self-awareness, self-management, and social awareness lead to more choice and high quality relationships at work?

Are you an emotionally and socially intelligent leader in practice? What do you do to create a positive, hopeful, emotional tone? What is it that you do so you can stay in touch with others? Do you know what is on people’s hearts and minds? How do you experience and demonstrate compassion in your work relationships? With yourself? What practices do you employ so you are in tune with yourself and others in your environment?

Authentic Leadership Creates spaces where inspired thinking, deep learning, and bold emergent action can take hold, wherever we are Entails connecting to reality as it is and choosing to be helpful Taps into the wellspring of human goodness and aspiration

“If you aspire to mastery, you must use your head, use your heart, and use your hands. You need a logical model that guides your approach to leading people and change (head), a clear sense of purpose and an authentic and gracious way of engaging others (heart), and practices that enable you to be prepared and competent in the moment (hands).” ~ Doug Conant

Masterful Leaders Are attuned: mind, body, heart & spirit Inspire through hope & vision Spread compassion Create resonance Engage in a conscious process of renewal, both on a daily basis and over time

What do you need to become the masterful leader you aspire to be?