Sexual Bullying

The formal definition of ‘Sexual bullying’ is: “Any bullying behaviour, whether physical or non-physical, that is based on a person’s sexuality or gender. It is when sexuality or gender is used as a weapon by boys or girls towards other boys or girls – although it is more commonly directed at girls. It can be carried out to a person’s face, behind their back or through the use of technology”. (NSPCC, adapted from the definition provided by WOMANKIND Worldwide)

Discuss the definition of ‘Sexual Bullying’ Is sexual bullying something that we should be worried about in the school environment? How aware do you think teachers, parent’s and guardians are about sexual bullying? Are you aware of what the consequences are for those who abuse others (including by text, , social networking sites)?

Who experiences sexual bullying?

Girls: While sexual bullying impacts on both genders, girls more often experience sexual harassment and bullying than boys. Girls who have been sexually harassed have reported poor body image, loss of self esteem, anger, isolation, mistrust of the opposite sex, and being uncomfortable when talking about sex. Boys: Boys are most often subject to sexual verbal abuse and being called obscene names. Males who have been sexually harassed have reported difficulties in talking, feeling emotionally hurt, feeling uncomfortable, and experiencing anger and self-hate.

Respect, Relationships, and Choice

Watch the following video clip. Anonymous texting

At the end of the show, we find out that the people who had been sending the texts were two sisters who were close friends with Gabby, and in her form. The sisters claimed that they had meant the texts as a joke and had no malicious intent. They were not aware they had committed a criminal offence. Why do you think that the sisters sent the texts? Do you think that by ‘playing jokes’ on Gabby that they showed respect for their relationship with her? Why did Gabby not see this as a joke, even though that is what the sisters had intended for it to be?

What a respectful relationship involves Work in groups of four or five, preferably in a mixture of genders. Copy the below table and discuss your ideas about what you feel a respectful relationship would include: With a partner (boy/girlfriend, spouse). With a friendWith a ‘non- friend’ (peer/colleague)

It is important you feel that you free to make your own choices and that you feel respected by others. Over one in four teenagers have experienced an unwanted sexual encounter. 15.9% experienced unwanted sex because they were drunk, with higher figures for females (17.6%) than males (13.9%). 12.6% experienced unwanted sex because they were pressured by their partner, with higher figures for females (13.9%) than males (11%). 2% experienced unwanted sex because they were pressured by their friends, with higher figures for males (2.9%) than females (1.2%).

Sexting

Someone taking an indecent image of themselves, and sending it to their friends or boy/girlfriend via a mobile phone or some other form of technology is sometimes referred to as ‘sexting’.

Have you thought… Whilst you might consider ‘sexting’ to be ‘private’, once these images have been taken and sent to others, control is lost of them and they can end up anywhere. They could be seen by friends, parents and family, a future employer, or even, in some cases, end up in the possession a sexual offender.

The Law about Sexting Sending "indecent photos" via your mobile phone is illegal in the UK under the 2003 Communications Act. You can get up to 6 months in jail and/or a £5,000 fine. At present it is illegal to take, hold or share "indecent" photos of anyone under 18 in the UK. It is "taking an indecent photograph of a child", which is a serious criminal offence. Depending on the circumstances, taking the image may also amount to inciting a child to perform a sexual act, causing a child to watch a sexual act, and, in some cases, engaging in sexual activity with a child – all of which are separate offences.

Although receiving the messages is not an offence, keeping them counts as "possessing an indecent image". The longer the image remains on a phone, the more serious the offence. Anyone who then forwards a message with an image of a child is likely to be committing a further offence of "distributing indecent images of children". Just think – if you wouldn’t print and pass these images around your school or show your mum or dad, they are probably not appropriate to share via phone or other technologies!

Image and Identity

Get back into the groups of three or four, preferably in a mixture of genders. You are about to see 4 pictures. You are going to imagine that these are all Facebook profile pictures. Each group should look at a different picture. In your group, one person is the character/s in the picture. They must be the ‘listener’. The other people in the group are then going to talk about this character as if they were talking behind their back whilst the ‘listener’ (character/s) listens to comments being made about them. Talk about the character for about a minute, then take time to discuss how the listener felt when they heard those things being said about ‘them’. At the end of the task, discuss as a class how you feel the people in the pictures are portraying themselves.

Picture 4

Thinking about yourself, and showing empathy to others

Everyone has the right to feel respected If you consider something to be a ‘joke’, don’t always expect others to follow your view Look for positive traits in others, and keep negative opinions to yourself. Everyone is entitled to their own identity If you have genuine concerns about someone’s welfare or personal activities, it is normally best to talk these concerns over with an adult, and not only your friends. Your friends are a great source of support, but may not always feel comfortable or experienced enough to advise you.

Things to remember; think before you act! Everything you do on a text, the internet, can be traced. What trail is following you? Empathise – how would you feel if the boot was on the other foot? Every choice impacts both you and the people around you: Who are you making happy? Who are you hurting? What impression are you giving?

If you feel that any of the issues raised from the ‘sexual bullying’ sessions require further discussion, please talk to your form tutor or progress leader. If you would prefer to confide in private about anything that has been discussed, you can anonymously Other useful contacts: (available on monmoodle) The Samaritans : NSPCC: National Domestic Violence: Supportline: Lesbian and Gay foundation: Questions about sex: talking-about.aspx