Restoring Marriage

Biblical Marriage for the Spirit- filled Husband and Wife

Two things I won’t teach from this text: First: A wife’s submission requires even enduring an abusive situation. believers will endure trials and hardship, but the Bible does not, in any relationship, condone the ill-treatment of one person toward another. Like all of Ephesians, this section assumes the reader submits to the previous commands regarding treatment of fellow Christians which certainly includes spouses.

Submission simplistic, robotic obedience on demand Children are instructed to obey (listen to; heed the words of) Yet, fathers are warned: Do not exasperate your children, that they may not lose heart (Col. 3.21) Slaves are instructed to obey their masters. Yet to masters, God says, “Masters, do the same thing (rule with fear and trembling in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ) knowing that both their master and yours is in heaven, and there is no partiality with Him” (Eph. 6.9).

Wives are instructed to submit to their husbands But regarding treatment of wives, God says to husbands, “You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Pet. 3.7).

Second thing I won’t teach I won’t teach that verses 21 and 22 work together to teach a mutual submission within marriage where there is no clearly defined, ordained head. Ephesians 5.23: the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is head of the Church Ephesians 5.24: as the Church is subject to Christ; so also the wives to their husbands Christ is clearly the ordained head of the Church and the Church is clearly submissive to Him.

Purpose for Headship & Submission To restore the fall’s corruption of the one-flesh intimacy of husband & wife Pre-Fall description of marriage: They were not only declared one flesh, but were actually one flesh emotionally and spiritually.

Purpose for Headship & Submission To restore the fall’s corruption of the one-flesh intimacy of husband & wife Post-Fall state of marriage: Thy were ashamed of their nakedness before one another (vulnerable to threat) Adam blamed Eve for his sin To Eve: “Your desire will be for your husband (to rule over him) but he will rule over you.” This design of Head & Helpmeet was from the beginning Both positions were corrupted: His Headship & Her Submission

Marriage for the Spirit-filled, in Christ The purpose of Ephesians 5.22ff is to restore within the Spirit-filled husband and wife, the intimacy of the pre-fall marital relationship. The One Flesh (Leave, cleave, weave) The meaning of submission spoken of here is the same as it is in v. 21. It is the willful submission of an equal to an equal as in v. 21, but in v. 22 a new element is added: an ordained head. The qualification of the head is not that he can subjugate or rule over his wife. The qualification of his headship/authority is that he loves his wife.

The husband is not commanded to subjugate his wife. He is not commanded to rule over her. He is not commanded to be her head. He is ordained as her head, he is commanded to love her. Eph. 5.22’s submission is not a subduing by an authority, but a voluntary submission to God’s ordained head, motivated by obedience to God and empowered by the Spirit.

Biblical Headship & Submission This is a biblical structure of headship and submission to which even Christ Himself is subject. 1 Corinthians 11.3: But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. So, while wives are clearly submissive to the headship of their husbands, husbands are subject to Christ and will answer to Him as to their head. Wives need to trust it; Husbands better bow down to it!

Her husband is the only man to whom a wife is to be subject. Ephesians 5.22: Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Titus 2.5: to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored. 1Peter 3.1: In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives. 1Peter 3.5: For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands.

As to the LORD A wife’s submission to her husband is to be modeled after her submission to Christ. In this there should be no: intimidation fear apprehension vulnerability what-ifs

As to the LORD trust him even when you don’t understand speak with him seeking understanding allow him to lead you allow him to guard and protect you take all your questions and decisions to him look to him for counsel and direction trust him for your sustenance never undermine his leadership consider how you reflect on him

Security for the Submissive Wife 1Peter 3.6: Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.