and Sexuality Love and Sexuality Love in American culture What is love? Theoretical approaches Sexual values and standards Sex in marriage Premarital sex and pregnancy Gay and lesbian sexuality

Historically Love, sex, marriage were separate Love, sex, marriage were separate 19 th century: love as pure, spiritual 19 th century: love as pure, spiritual Marriage as companionship Marriage as companionship 1920’s: sexual liberation 1920’s: sexual liberation Today: love, sex before marriage Today: love, sex before marriage

Cultural Views of Love (Ann Swidler) Mythic (Youthful) Mythic (Youthful) –Choice –Rebellion –Self-realization –Sexual expression Prosaic (Mature) Prosaic (Mature) –Commitment –Attachment –Self-sacrifice –Restraint

What is Love? Schacter Psychology of emotion Psychology of emotion All emotions have 2 components All emotions have 2 components –Physiological arousal –Definition of situation (labeling of emotion)

What is Love? Reiss: Wheel Theory Intimacy Needs Rapport Mutual dependency Self- revelation Sociocultural Background Role conceptions

3 components to love relationships: 3 components to love relationships: What is Love? Sternberg: Triangular Theory Intimacy PassionDecision/commitment

Triangles can take different shapes Triangles can take different shapes “Match” b/t partners’ triangles is crucial “Match” b/t partners’ triangles is crucial I P D/C I I P Infatuation Empty love P Romantic love

Lover as attachment object Lover as attachment object All love relationships are the same: All love relationships are the same: –Bond depends on AO’s response –Happier if AO present –Share more with AO –Feel at one with AO What is Love? Shaver: Attachment Theory

Three types of adult attachment Three types of adult attachment –Secure (56%) –Anxious/ambivalent (19%) –Avoidant (24%)

Passionate love Passionate love –Sexually charged, early in relationship Companionate love Companionate love –Affection and partnership; long-lasting 2 Stages of love

Sexual Value Systems (Gecas and Libby) Traditional-religious (began in colonial times) Traditional-religious (began in colonial times) Romantic (late 19 th century) Romantic (late 19 th century) Recreational (historically applied to men; more recently to women) Recreational (historically applied to men; more recently to women) Utilitarian-predatory (probably always existed) Utilitarian-predatory (probably always existed)

Sexual Standards, 2002 (GSS) Premarital sex: acceptable for adults, not young teens Premarital sex: acceptable for adults, not young teens Homosexuality: Divided opinions Homosexuality: Divided opinions Extramarital sex: not acceptable Extramarital sex: not acceptable Premaritalsex Premarital sex (teens 14-16) Extramarital sex Homosexual sex Always wrong Almost always wrong Sometimes wrong Not wrong at all

Sex in Marriage Is monogamous Is monogamous Is part of wider life context Is part of wider life context Involves decisions about parenthood Involves decisions about parenthood More likely to involve contraception More likely to involve contraception

Contraceptive Use, 1995 Pregnancy Prevention % using Sterilization27.9 Pill17.3 Condom13.1 Diaphragm, IUD, other Periodic abstinence, “natural” FP No Pregnancy Prevention Pregnant, trying to conceive, post-partum, non- surgically sterile, or not sexually active last 3 mo Sexually active, not pregnant or trying, not sterile, and not contracepting (i.e., “taking chances”)

Teenage premarital sex % of never-married teenagers who ever had intercourse, 2002 FemalesMales All year-olds Ages Ages

Race/ethnic differences in teen sex

Age at first intercourse Female (%) Male (%) Under Never married teens, ages 15-19, 2002

# of partners, last 12 months Never married teens, ages 15-19, 2002

% not using contraception at first intercourse AgeFemalesMales Under Never married teens, ages 15-19, 2002

Percent of teen births before and after marriage,

Conclusions: Teen sexual behavior Most teens have had sex by age 18 Most teens have had sex by age 18 Boys, minorities start earlier Boys, minorities start earlier Typical age is around Typical age is around Most have had 0 or 1 partners in 12 mos. Most have had 0 or 1 partners in 12 mos. Sex is spontaneous, opportunistic, infrequent Sex is spontaneous, opportunistic, infrequent Birth control is often overlooked Birth control is often overlooked –10% of teen girls become pregnant each year

The Teen Pregnancy “Problem” 1/3 of teen pregnancies end in abortion 1/3 of teen pregnancies end in abortion Teen pregnancy rate has declined, but Teen pregnancy rate has declined, but Most teen births occur outside of marriage Most teen births occur outside of marriage –Blacks: 96% –Whites, Hispanics: 72% Many teen mothers keep and raise children today Many teen mothers keep and raise children today

Giving birth as alternative entry to adulthood Giving birth as alternative entry to adulthood –Maybe few other “good” choices Grandmothers willing to raise grandchildren Grandmothers willing to raise grandchildren Community accepts and supports this Community accepts and supports this Lack of “eligible” husbands Lack of “eligible” husbands Alternative Life-Course Theory

Lower education Lower education Lower income Lower income More likely to need public assistance More likely to need public assistance More likely to divorce More likely to divorce Some of these “disadvantages” due to “selection effect” Some of these “disadvantages” due to “selection effect” Consequences for Teenage Mothers

Sexual identity: self-identity as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual Sexual identity: self-identity as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual Research supports biological component Research supports biological component –Studies of twins, brothers –May run in families Environmental factors may play a role Environmental factors may play a role Controversial – has political implications Controversial – has political implications Gay and Lesbian Sexuality

Ignored until late 19 th century Ignored until late 19 th century Sexual acts divided into wrong/not wrong Sexual acts divided into wrong/not wrong OK to express intimate feelings for same sex OK to express intimate feelings for same sex Late 1800s: anti-homosexuality campaign Late 1800s: anti-homosexuality campaign –Defined as abnormal, mental illness –Medical model stigmatized homosexuals Emergence of “Homosexuality”

1948: Kinsey Report 50% of men reported erotic feeling toward other men 50% of men reported erotic feeling toward other men 1/3 had one experience with another man 1/3 had one experience with another man Estimated 10% of men were exclusively homosexual Estimated 10% of men were exclusively homosexual More recent surveys: 4.1 % of men and 2.2 % women More recent surveys: 4.1 % of men and 2.2 % women

1950’s: Homosexuals labeled “security risks” by govt. 1950’s: Homosexuals labeled “security risks” by govt. 1960s: Civil rights, women’s movements - term “gay” emerged 1960s: Civil rights, women’s movements - term “gay” emerged 2003: Supreme Court struck down laws against homosexual relations 2003: Supreme Court struck down laws against homosexual relations Today: Much dissent about gay marriage Today: Much dissent about gay marriage Consensual unions, domestic partners more accepted Consensual unions, domestic partners more accepted Late 20 th Century

Objections to Gay Marriage Don’t want to sanction “immoral” behavior Don’t want to sanction “immoral” behavior Seen as threat to traditional marriage Seen as threat to traditional marriage Cost of providing employee benefits to more people Cost of providing employee benefits to more people – already being done in many organizations – actual costs have been small

Why Gay Marriage? Gives gays more acceptance, support Gives gays more acceptance, support Provides legal rights of spouse: Provides legal rights of spouse: –Beneficiary of employee’s pension, insurance –Joint income tax return –Social Security benefits, inheritance –Joint responsibility for children –Visitation w/children after divorce –Make decisions if spouse is unable

Summary: Love and Sexuality Shift from economics to emotional bond Shift from economics to emotional bond Growth of alternatives to marriage Growth of alternatives to marriage Result: Result: –marriage as voluntary –marriage based on love, compatibility –sex before marriage –family as individually defined –More acceptance of homosexuality