Achieving Emotional Balance in a Chaotic World Chapter Nine Achieving Emotional Balance in a Chaotic World

Emotions: An Introduction Emotions are strong, positive or negative, temporary feelings

Figure 9.1 - Behavior Is Influenced by Activating Events

Achieving Emotional Balance—A Daily Challenge

Emotional Intelligence Emotional intelligence is the ability to monitor and control one’s emotions and behavior at work and in social settings

Personal Competence Refers to the competencies that determine how we manage ourselves

Social Competence Refers to the competencies that determine how we handle relationships

Emotional Expression Emotional imbalance can be due to Learned inhibition of certain emotions and overemphasis on the expression of others Fixation on a single emotion

The Emotional Factor at Work

Factors That Influence Our Emotions Temperament Unconscious influences Cultural conditioning

Temperament Refers to a person’s individual style of expressing needs and emotions

Unconscious Influences The unconscious mind is a vast storehouse of forgotten memories, desires, ideas, and frustrations

Cultural Conditioning Culture is what we see and hear so often that we call it reality Shapes nearly every aspect of behavior and mental processes

Important Roles of Emotions It is important to remain open to the full range of emotions that influence our thinking and behavior Emotional undercurrents are present in every aspect of our work

Coping with Your Anger and the Anger of Others Anger is defined as the thoughts, feelings, physical reactions, and actions that result from the unacceptable behavior of others

Managing Your Anger Learning to deal with anger and the anger of others is a sophisticated and mature skill people should learn Monitor your anger Use a diary or journal to determine the impact of anger in your life

Effective Ways to Express Your Anger Avoid reacting in a manner that could be seen as emotionally unstable Do not make accusations or attempt to fix blame Express your feelings in a timely manner Be specific as you describe the factors that triggered your anger, and be clear about the resolution you are seeking

How to Handle Other People’s Anger Recognize and accept the other person’s anger Encourage the angry person to vent feelings Do not respond to an angry person with anger Give the angry person feedback

Emotional Styles You are likely to display one of four different emotional styles Suppressing Capitulating Overexpressing Accommodating

Suppressing Your Emotions

Figure 9.2 - The Sedona Method

Capitulating to Your Emotions

Overexpressing Your Emotions

Accommodating Your Emotions

Gender Differences in Emotional Style

Strategies for Achieving Emotional Control

Identifying Your Emotional Patterns

Fine-Tuning Your Emotional Style