Self-Evaluation: Using the read-around samples and what you gleaned from yesterday’s reading: Reread your Lincoln paper with an eye for scoring Score your paper. Which essay is yours most like? Why? What two things could you do to improve it? (Check your list from yesterday.) Read a peer’s paper and self-evaluation. Do you agree with their score? Why/why not?

Let’s talk Weeds and Roses You’ll get your Lincoln score from yours truly back tomorrow We will revise a paragraph from “My Life as an Undocumented Immigrant” tomorrow based on today’s feedback.

Weeds and Roses Lincoln

Weed #1: Use the jargon you know I was a mean, evil, 90/90 harpie for a reason Instead of saying “Lincoln repeats the beginning of each line with ‘neither,’ what term should you use? Why is employing jargon helpful/important in Literary Analysis?

Weed #2: Flyswat How does a flyswatter work?

Whack the crap out of the fly! Make your analysis specific and meaningful (have something interesting to say). BLANKET statements (generic, simplified, duh) vs. FLY SWATTER analysis (on-the-nose-specific- that’s-exactly-what-it-is!)

Examples of Non-flyswatting: “Lincoln uses the same words over and over to draw the audience in.” “The use of the Bible allows both sides to come together as one.”

Non-flyswatting: Flyswatting: “Lincoln uses the same words over and over to draw the audience in.” Lincoln utilizes anaphora when he begins several successive sentences with the word “neither”: “Neither party expected…neither anticipated…” While the word connotates a negative, it actually has the effect of illustrating similarities between the North and South—both were ignorant in their assumptions of the war. By highlighting likeness of the two groups, Lincoln can begin to discuss them not as a nation divided, but as one entity. Forming a solitary group is indispensable if the Union is to reconcile and reconstruct.

Now you try: “The use of the Bible allows both sides to come together as one.” Hint 1: Use the chart for analysis that we discussed during our last Weeds and Roses! Hint 2: Why would have chosen to use that word/strategy? What is its effect? Hint: 3 Now relate these ideas back to purpose. How does this strategy/word choice aid the development of the author’s purpose?

Weed #3—Analyze More Same, same, but different from Weed #2 Say more, notice more, discuss more Aim to discuss at least three strategies, littered throughout the text How could you easily include more of the text?

“Lincoln uses parallel sentence structure multiple times to achieve these comparisons: ‘All dreaded it, all sought to avert it,’ and ‘but one of them would make war rather than let the nation survive, and the other would accept war rather than let it perish.’ He also utilizes isocolon when he begins to shift his perspective: ‘Fondly do we hope, fervently do we pray…’ This parallel structure reflects on the similarities in both parties that caused the war to start. Lincoln attempts to rid all finger-pointing as to who started the war by paralleling and comparing both sides, holding them in equal light. This should cause the audience to contemplate who and why they accuse each other, and hopefully, to rid each side of scapegoating the other.”

“Lincoln further utilizes repetition; he uses the word ‘war’ a total of six times in two complex sentences: ‘Both parties deprecated war, but one of them would make war rather than let the nation survive, and the other would accept war…’ Lincoln seeks to send his audience thinking, contemplating the negative connotation of war in their minds. War is often associated with blood and death, so Lincoln’s use of the word casts a serious tone that could knock the foolishness out of many close-minded people.”

Weed #4: Affect vs. Effect Affect (verb): to influence The weather has affected my hair. Effect (noun): the result of something The effect was ultimate frizz.

Roses! Nice work including all given information: date, author, title (occasion). This shows you read, understand and realize it’s importance! Various introductions are working. Check out the difference between these two:

 “On March 4 th, 1865, re-elected President Abraham Lincoln gave his second Inaugural Address. This speech, most expected, was to be long and full of references to politics, slavery and states’ rights, but instead, Lincoln gave a speech wash was short and to the point. He first contemplates the effects the Civil War had on our country, its people and they way they coincided. A short time later, Lincoln offers his vision for the future. The way in which President Lincoln presents his speech using anaphora, apostrophe and repeated words helps to convey the purpose of the speech to his audience.”

“The Civil War was a war that threatened to tear America apart. It was long and extremely bloody. Death was its middle name. The South fought to keep the slaves; the North fought to free them. President Lincoln fought to keep the Union together, because he saw America as a beacon of freedom for countries that would soon follow in her path. In his second Inaugural Address, President Lincoln used rhetorical strategies to contemplate the Civil War’s effects on America, and to offer a vision for America’s future.”

“President Abraham Lincoln, one of the most celebrated presidents, is well known for his involvement in the Civil War and the emancipation of slaves. He was the man who brought he United States through war and emerged with the Union intact. He liberated millions of men and women who had been oppressed for their entire lives and gave them a chance for a new existence. Yet before his actions became a reality, he had to successfully win the war. In his Second Inaugural Address, Lincoln thoughtfully reflected upon the effects of the war that ravaged the country and also proposed a plan to preserve the Union. Through his use of rhetorical strategies, Lincoln was able to effectively and eloquently convey his message.”

“He uses this allusion to the Bible to emphasize the fact that God has a plan for everyone and those who fight it and commit crimes…will not have as good of a life. Lincoln references God to increase his ethos, because in the late 1800’s most citizens of the United States were God-fearing Christian people who at the time of the war both asked for Him to let their side win. God reminded people of church and a feeling of belonging and togetherness, which made Northerners want to preserve the Union even more, leading to Lincoln’s vision for the future. It also reminded the citizens of all that they had lost to the Civil War and all they could gain back if the Union won.”

“Lincoln continues in a contemplative tone in the following paragraphs when he makes several allusions to the Bible. Lincoln makes a harsh point that of the two sides—North and South— ’Both read the same Bible and pray to the same God.’ Lincoln suggests to his audience that in many ways, one’s enemy is in fact, very similar to oneself. The opposing side is not some abominable monster, but a person, who has fears and quarrels, the same as any other human being.”

Weed #1—Don’t plagarize!  Yes, the purpose is given to you, but…  What should you do with this?  Which parts are okay to keep word for word?  What do you do with the word for word parts?  Which parts are not? “United States President Abraham Lincoln surprised his audience—which expected a lengthy speech on politics, slavery and states’ rights—with a short speech in which he contemplated the effects of the Civil War and offered his vision for the future of the nation.”

A good example: “Abraham Lincoln’s Second Inaugural Address was a very unique speech in that it was not made to talk about politics, but rather to give hope and encouragement to a divided nation battered by a four year long civil war.” Great sentence, huh? But let’s get picky. How can we make this more clear, less wordy? Rule of 25 or less.

“Abraham Lincoln’s Second Inaugural Address was a very unique speech in that it was not made to talk about politics, but rather to give hope and encouragement to a divided nation battered by a four year long civil war.” (39 words) “Abraham Lincoln’s Second Inaugural Address was unique; it spoke not about politics, but rather gave hope and encouragement to a divided nation battered by a four year civil war.” (29 words)

Weed #2—Address whole piece Prompt makes shift in the piece clear: contemplation and vision You have to find it Got one, but not the other? Success of not discussing both sides?

Weed #4—Discuss what happened, not what didn’t “If the author had used the word ‘play’ instead of game…” How many things could the author have done? What does the prompt ask you to discuss? Use to help brainstorm, but do not include it in your writing

Grammar Tidbit: Use a colon between an introduction and quote if: Intro clause is independent Quote explains intro clause Ms. K doesn’t like driving in the snow: “My car spun out six times yesterday!” You try one!

What about the repetition of “with”? What does “with” mean? Why is that specific word repeated? What is that device called when you include extra conjunctions?

RER due Wednesday! AP Write moved to Wednesday Two passages to discuss, similar to Oke