Preventing and Resolving Conflict

Behavior Styles Business is the interaction of people Sometimes we react to peoples behavior Sometimes we react to peoples demands We need to be proactive rather than reactive If we understand some of the basic behavior styles we can Prepare beforehand how we should interact Understand what motivates others Help eliminate some conflicts

Many studies have been done on these styles They basically get categorized into four groups Demanders Also called Drivers, Directors, Dominant, Lions, Eagles Detailers Also called Analytics, Thinkers, Compliant, Owls, Beavers Advocates Also called Amiables, Feelers, Steady, Dove, Golden Retreiver Socializers Also called Expressives, Intuitives, Influencing, Peacock, Otter Let’s look at each a little closer

Demander Very task oriented Characteristics: Controlling, assertive, goal- oriented, self-motivated, wants immediate results How can you adjust to ensure good communications?

Detailer Task Oriented Characteristics: Detailed, precise, makes decisions based on facts Now consider this type of person. What can help you communicate with their style

Advocate People Oriented Characteristics: Relationship and team- oriented, sensitive, generates and supports ideas What ways can you adapt and communicate with this style?

People Oriented Characteristics: Personable, talkative, positive attitude, “wing it” approach Finally consider this type of person. What can help you communicate with their style?

Dealing with Conflict Lets look at some ways that conflicts are dealt with. As we read them, lets discuss each one, its good points and bad points.

The Indirect Method The person in conflict is indirect – they hint at the problem that is bothering them but never openly address the issue!

The Blame Game This solution finds a person looking to blame someone or something outside themselves to blame the situation on.

Fantastic Sarcastic A person will use sarcasm in talking to others about the situation.

Billygoat Gruff The person will seek a specific scapegoat, usually one who cannot respond back.

The Smoothie When a situation gets tense, the person makes an active effort to smooth over the tension, or may even just live with the situation, even if it may be negative

The Steam Pipe This person unloads. They blowup or let off steam; They let people know exactly how they feel.

The Hider A person like this hides their feelings at the moment and will only reveal them later to friends or confidants in private.

The Seeker This person attempts to seek clarification and more information about the situation.

The Denialer If a person sublimates their feelings by putting their energy and attention into other unrelated activities and interests, they certainly fit this category.

The Gatherer Spends their time listening and gathering additional information by talking with those involved.

The Conceder Backing down under pressure rather that dealing with the conflict

The Compromiser Always tries to make an active attempt to compromise.

The Complainer These types complain to others about the unfairness of the situation

The Innovator Makes an effort to seek creative alternatives to the situation

Communicating Effectively Interpersonal Communications 7% of interpersonal communication is traceable to the words spoken 55% is the result of body language and facial expressions 38% is how we use our voices (tone, inflection, pauses, etc.)

Four steps to an effective message Identify the message that needs to be conveyed Prepare the message for the right audience Deliver the message Confirm it was received and understood

Mini-course on Speaking State your case Support with facts, details and examples Relate the benefits Close with a restatement, question, or observation

Feedback and Coaching Appreciative to constructive feedback ratio should be 4 to 1 Use “I” instead of YOU when providing constructive feedback Be specific and cite examples when possible Make a recommendation or suggestion with your constructive feedback When receiving feedback, listen openly. Focus on content, not the person.

Preventing and Resolving Conflict Workshop

Anatomy of an Argument Picking the fight and stating its agenda. Destructive: Every complaint by one party is matched by a countercharge by the other Neither gives the least indication that there may be some validity to the other’s views Constructive: Even as the two are beginning to disagree, one party at least partly acknowledges the other’s point of view Even such subtle cues as carefully

Now the argument is at its most heated Destructive: One party “mind reads” inaccurately, making claims about what the other thinks, or feels, and then attacks those fictitious thoughts or feelings Constructive: Even during the stormiest time, one party accurately “mind reads”, saying how the other is feeling about the issue.

Negotiation, or winding down Destructive Every proposed compromise is met by a counter- proposal, with no accommodation on either side Constructive The parties agree to a compromise or modify their views

Lose-Lose Becomes Win-Win

Negotiating to Win-Win Describe the conflict as a mutual problem Offer to negotiate differences Brainstorm alternative solutions together Evaluate the brainstormed solutions Decide on the best solution Plan how the solutions will be implemented

Preventing and Resolving Conflict Workshop 2

Preventing and Resolving Conflict Workshop 3