 A type of communication in which the focus is the needs of all involved.  The process allows us to step back and observe without making judgment  A way to differentiate thinking and feeling  Offers a way to clearly state what we do want and need.

 It can improve relationships by building relationships based on compassion and understanding  Learn how to be assertive, yet flexible  You can accurately understand other people’s needs and feelings  It helps break patterns of thinking that lead to anger

 School systems  Health care  Prisons  Workplaces  Law enforcement and military  Social service agencies  Couples, families, communities

 Four components:  Observations  Feeling  Needs  Request  Two parts  Empathy  Honesty

Empathically listening: observations feelings needs requests Honestly Expressing observations feelings needs requests

AFFECTIONATE compassionate friendly loving open hearted sympathetic tender warm CONFIDENT empowered open proud safe secure ENGAGED Excited absorbed amazed alert animated curious ardent engrossed aroused enchanted astonished entranced dazzled fascinated eager interested energetic intrigued enthusiastic involved giddy spellbound lively stimulated passionate vibrant SAD depressed dejected despair despondent disappointed discouraged disheartened forlorn gloomy heavy hearted hopeless melancholy unhappy wretched

JOYFUL amused delighted glad happy jubilant pleased tickled PEACEFUL calm clear headed comfortable centered content equanimous fulfilled mellow quiet relaxed relieved satisfied serene still tranquil trusting EMBARRASSED ashamed chagrined flustered guilty mortified self-conscious AFRAID apprehensive dread foreboding frightened mistrustful panicked petrified scared suspicious terrified wary worried ANNOYED aggravated dismayed disgruntled displeased exasperated frustrated impatient irritated irked ANGRY enraged furious incensed indignant irate livid outraged resentful

CONNECTION acceptance affection appreciation belonging cooperation communication closeness community companionship compassion consideration consistency empathy inclusion intimacy CONNECTION CONT’D love mutuality nurturing respect/self-respect safety security stability support to know and be known to see and be seen to understand and be understood trust warmth PHYSICAL WELL-BEING air food movement/exercise rest/sleep sexual expression safety shelter touch water HONESTY authenticity integrity presence

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 When I see that______________ I feel ______________ because my need for ________________ is/is not met. Would you be willing to __________________?