‘Skill Focus: Developing Personal Resilience’ Kiki Maurey, Executive Coach & Speaker Director, Kiki Maurey Consultancy Ltd

resilience is vital: handling change

Getting honest feedback Maintaining relationships & support Sustaining ourselves Meanings & accomplishments resilience is vital: managing performance HOLY GRAIL

The ability to… 1.cope with pressure and stress 2.manage one’s emotions (but not suppress them) 3.develop mental toughness or‘hardiness - despite challenging circumstances 4.maintain perspective and ‘bounce back’ from adversity … but 1 st, what is‘resilience’?

9 beliefs and qualities of resilient people 1.grounded in reality and can consciously keep a sense of proportion 2.a belief in a higher purpose to what they do 3.have a vision for the future 4.set milestones and goals for their career trajectory 5.have a clear understanding of their values and strengths 6.disciplined: find the space to think creatively (problem-solving) & apply it effectively 7.learn positively from their own, and others’ failures 8.understand that the quality of their thoughts leads to how they feel 9.believe in their innate ability to adapt and improve

… pressure or stress as pressure on us increases, we enter ‘peak performance’ pressure helps us focus on the task and perform well TASK: balancing PP pressure, and disruptive levels of stress?

we can’t always control events, but we can learn we have a choice over how we react … who’s in charge?

the stress cycle What are you noticing?How to ‘reset’? 4. Physical symptoms 3. Behaviours 2. Moods/Feelings 1. Thoughts

… reflections 1.Do you feel genuinely connected to who you really are at work? 2.Do you recognise the value of self-awareness and reflection? 3.Are you disciplined about how you look after yourself? 4.Are you able to build empathy and reciprocity in your professional relationships? 5.What about the level of support you get, and also what you offer others?

… the ‘secret’ It’s the HEART stupid! Very strong relationship between heart rates, brain-heart messaging and peak performance

… at ‘the HEART’ of resilience High heart rate / challenge Low heart rate / relaxation Resilience/Success/W ellbeing Stress/Submission/ Despair Dynamic Passionate Engaged Loss of interest Cynical Depressed Frustrated Angry Panicked Cool under pressure In ‘the flow’ Contented [HeartMath and The Authentic Organisation] High Performance Low Performance

… the ‘secret heart’ the heart has its own complex nervous system – the ‘Heart Brain’ the heart sends far more information to the brain than vice versa the heart signals especially affect the brain centres involved in decision-making, creativity and emotional experience etc extensive magnetic force around the heart Source: HeartMath and the Authentic Organisation

keeping heart, mind and emotions in-sync and balanced enabling the immune, hormonal and nervous systems to function in a state of coordination COHERENCE is being… energetically centered able to increase mental and emotional flexibility able to increase your capacity to be in charge of yourself Source: HeartMath and the Authentic Organisation … the ‘secret heart’

… sometimes things just don’t work out

…coping takes commitment Be honest, are you a “frustration junky”? message to the brain: “Switch off executive centre, revert to primitive brain… freeze, flight, or fight”

…coping takes commitment How about becoming an “appreciation junky”? message to the brain: “Everything’s fine, there’s no threat just engage with the experience and enjoy… be at my best”

the message: ‘this too will pass’ recognise the pattern, and take steps to disengage breathe through your heart, 7:11, relax your body invoke a positive feeling / focus on things and people you love ask yourself ‘is there another way of looking at things?’ smile, hugs, empathy, love, send blessings, and give thanks note the change in perspective, and write down your small victories

your resilience self-assessment 1.I am grounded in reality and can consciously keep a sense of proportion 2.I believe there is a higher purpose to what I do 3.I have a vision for the future 4.I set milestones and goals and can feel my trajectory 5.I have a clear understanding of my values and strengths 6.I find the space to think creativity (problem-solving) and to apply it effectively 7.I learn positively from mine and others’ failures 8.I understand that the quality of my thoughts leads to how I feel 9.I believe in my inbuilt ability to adapt and improve

we can’t always control events, but we can learn we have a choice over how we react … who’s in charge?

resilience is vital: your approach is up to you