Experts Advice on Parental Discipline Bridges to the Baccalaureate By: Renee LaPlant

Introduction In my study I am searching for the answers to the questions most parents have, “what do the experts say are the best and worst ways for parents to discipline their children?” Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs that anyone can have, but the experts have some great advice on what to do and what not to do in certain situations with everyday problems and situations. In my study I have compiled what the experts say are the best and worst ways to discipline children, because of this I have seen the best ways to verbally discipline children without damaging them mentally or physically. I have also studied some very severe cases of abuse and neglect, but my main focus will be on the best ways to discipline your children.

Methods and Materials The main instrument used in compiling this information was the “Maternal Discipline Techniques –Self Report Instrument: Typical Child Behavior Problems.” It is a series of 42 questions given to parents who are being observed to determine if their parental rights should be given back to them. The parents are required to respond to the question a total of three times in order to receive the most accurate answer. In order to understand these 42 questions, I also completed the Typical Child Behavior Problems packet. I have also studied an interview with a dysfunctional family titled “The Trouble With Adam.” The main focus of this film was on 11 year old Adam who was physically and mentally abused by his mother and step-father. I used this information to gain knowledge on the effects of abuse on the entire family in general. I have also read a series of books that have helped me to determine what the best ways are to raise and discipline a child of any background. I have also helped create and compile new questions to add to the Typical Child Behavior Problems Questions. My mentor Paul Silverman was also a big help in this project.

Examples of Typical Child Behavior Problems: Questions 1. [misbehavior] Your child is potty-training, but continuously pees on the carpet and walls. First method: What would you do? Second method: What do you do if s/he does it again? Third method: What if it happens again? 2. [fears/victim] You find out that your child has been bullied or beaten up after school. First Method: What would you do? Second Method: What if it happened again? Third Method: What if this happens constantly 3. Your 3 year old is taking a bath, you hear him/her start crying when you go into the bathroom you see that s/he was standing up and then fell. First Method: What would you do? Second Method: What if it happened again? Third Method: What if your child didn't listen and always stood up in the tub?

Abstract I am searching for what the experts say are the best and worse ways to discipline children. I look at parenting as a learning experience for both the parents and children, but I also see parents as the main teachers in a child’s life. This information was compiled mainly for the benefit of the parents. All of the information that was used in this study came from previous work completed by many authors and psychologists. I have used books, films, and questionnaires to complete my study. In the final stages of the study I found out that communication and preparation are the main things to focus on while parenting children.

Results: What the experts say are the best ways to discipline your child. Develop coping patterns for your children and yourself. Parenting classes are a good start for anyone even considering becoming a parent. Planning will help the parent to decide if they need to make any changes to the child’s environment in order to have a successful confrontation. Work with your children, you cant have a relationship with your children all by yourself, get cooperation from your children. Listen to what your children have to say, communication may prevent misunderstandings which can lead to an even bigger fight. If you want cooperation, be cooperative, if you want respect, be respectful. Make sure your rules are clear.

Results: What the Experts say are the Worst ways to Discipline your child Ignoring Misbehavior Physically force to do a task Humiliate child Reject child Soap in Mouth Restrain Threaten with physical harm or punishment or throw away or destroy toy

Discussions In this study I have found out that the best parenting methods are preparation and communication. Parenting classes will help anyone who is considering becoming a parent, and they will help families work through problematic times and situations. I also found out that most of the discipline tactics that have been used on people for a very long time now, are the worst ways to discipline children. Some of the points on “What the Experts say are the Best Ways to Discipline your Child” were taken from a book based on raising spirited children, I feel that all children are different, and because of this they should all receive the attention and nurturing that spirited children receive.

References Raising Your Spirited Child (1992). Mary S. Kercinka. NY: Harper- Collins. Parenting Teenagers (1990). D. Dinkmeyer and G.D. McKay. Circle Pines, MN: American Guidance Service Toddlers and Parents Dell Publishing Co., Inc 1 Dag Hammarskjold Plaza new York, New York Family Evaluation in Child Custody Litigation, Kreskill New Jersey. Creative Therapy, Gardner R.A Dr. Paul Silverman, Missoula Mt, The University of Montana, 2004