An Introduction to Attachment Implications for School Leadership Megan Smith Senior Educational Psychologist Suffolk Community Educational Psychology Service

Session Content A brief outline of Attachment Theory including some of the neuroscience of attachment Consideration of some of the implications for school leadership

Attachment theory has had significant implications:

What is Attachment? Attachment is a deep and enduring emotional bond that connects one person to another across time and space. (Ainsworth, 1973; Bowlby, 1969). Attachment is a deep and enduring emotional bond that connects one person to another across time and space (Ainsworth, 1973; Bowlby, 1969). Attachment does not have to be reciprocal. One person may have an attachment with an individual which is not shared. Attachment is characterized by specific behaviours in children, such as seeking proximity with the attachment figure when upset or threatened (Bowlby, 1969). Attachment behaviour in adults towards the child includes responding sensitively and appropriately to the child’s needs. Such behaviour appears universal across cultures. Attachment theory provides an explanation of how the parent-child relationship emerges and influences subsequent development.

What happens when ‘Good Enough’ parenting is available? Secure Base Containment What do these things look like in school? Attunement Internal Working Model

What are the numbers? the report identifies that as many as 40 per cent of children lack secure bonds, and there is particular concern for the 15 per cent who actively resist their parent. Sutton Trust 2014; Sophie Moullin, Professor Jane Waldfogel and Dr Liz Washbrook EXECUTIVE SUMMARY Many children do not have secure attachments. Around 1 in 4 children avoid their parents when they are upset, because they ignore their needs. A further 15 per cent resist their parents because they cause them distress. While the majority of children are securely attached, 40 per cent are insecurely attached. This is split into the 25 per cent of children who learn to avoid their parent when they are distressed, because the parent regularly ignores their emotional needs (avoidant attachment) and the highest risk 15 per cent of children,rising to 25 per cent in disadvantaged cohorts who learn to resist the parent, because the parent often amplifies their distress or responds unpredictably (disorganised or resistant attachment). Boys growing up in poverty are two and a half times less likely to display behaviour problems at school if they have secure attachments with parents in the early years. Those without strong bonds may be more likely to be NEET, and less likely to be socially mobile and get good jobs in later life. Mary Ainsworth Strange situation

Threats to Attachment Pre-birth stress, for example, mother self-harms or experiences domestic violence Alcohol and/or drug use during pregnancy Parental illness before or after birth, for example ante- or post-natal depression Parental mental health, e.g. depression, bipolar, personality disorder Premature baby Bereavements in family Baby having a disability Neglect Emotional abuse Sexual abuse Physical abuse Witnessing domestic violence Home instability Multiple home or school placements in early years Parent or caregiver have attachment-based problems from their own childhood Young parenting Long hospitalization for either baby or parent which results in prolonged separation Poverty or extreme wealth Lack of stimulating environment Chaotic, stressful family environment Poverty Low quality early childcare

What happens in the brain? Levels of cortisol respond to attachment patterns: secure attachment means babies are better able to cope with stress with generally low cortisol levels Higher cortisol levels lead to poor self-regulation, shrinking connections and cell death in the brain Children who have been severely abused or neglected are subject to chronic high levels of blood cortisol and can have head circumferences smaller than average

What Happens When Attachment is Threatened? “Still Face Experiment Dr Edward Tronick

Murray and Trevarthen 1985

Resources for staff training www.attachmentawareschools.com/ Attachment Aware Schools is a partnership between Bath Spa University, Bath and North East Somerset Council, the National College for Teaching and Leadership, a range of third sector organisations, attachment specialists and schools. PowerPoints for staff training Attachment Aware audit

ACAMH Member: £90 Non-Member: £118 http://www.acamh.org/local-network/east-anglia/events ‘Inside I’m Hurting’: supporting the pupil who has experienced significant relational traumas and loss Date: Friday 13 March 2015; 9:00am - 4:00pm Venue: Trinity Park Centre, Felixstowe Road, Ipswich, Suffolk IP3 8UH ACAMH Member: £90 Non-Member: £118

Attachment framework for understanding behaviour styles Secure Insecure and Avoidant attachment Insecure Ambivalent Attachment Insecure Disorganised Attachment

Secure attachment “Adults are reliable and helpful. I know that I can trust them to meet my needs; you’re there for me. I find it easy to trust you and others. I am OK if you are with me or busy doing other things. You find me relatively easy to relate to.” Bomber 2007

Avoidant attachment “Adults are rejecting or intrusive. So when I meet you I will avoid and ignore you and look after myself. I won’t be asking you for help no matter what I face. It’s not OK to be emotional. Love? Care? Why would I trust you? You have no idea what I need.” Bomber (2007)

Ambivalent attachment “Adults are unpredictable. I have to draw attention to myself to get you to notice me and to make sure I get my needs met, even if it’s just some of them. I can’t rely on you working out what I need and when. Sometimes you will feel like I’m in your face but you’ve got to understand that I can’t bear to be ignored – that terrifies me. I want comfort but it doesn’t help me.” Bomber (2007)

Disorganised attachment “Adults are either frightening by being abusive towards you or frightened because they seem so scared or helpless most of the time. I don’t know whether to approach you or run away from you. I feel confused by you and others. I’m bad. I’m frightened. Why should I trust you? But then I need you sometimes. I need to stay in control and be ready. Who knows what will happen next.” Bomber(2007) “It’s like being starving, but faced with a ‘poisoned cake’” (Hopkins, 1990) As a consequence of their early experiences, the child is on constant alert for immediate danger; hyper-vigilant, but exhausted. The nature of their behaviour appears irrational, as though it cannot possibly be explained These children often view themselves as unworthy of anyone’s care; undeserving and of little value They have an absence of trust in the authority of adults Often are insensitive to others feelings Extremely sensitive to criticism and implied humiliation Place considerable importance on objects, rather than relationships

The Learning Triangle: 1. Securely Attached Pupil Resilient Confident Self Esteem Independent Achieving Positive Approach to School Teacher Task 19

Pupils who can’t ask for help: 2. Insecure – Avoidant Indifferent Underachieving Sensitive to Teacher proximity Denial of the need for teacher support Hostility towards the teacher is directed towards the task Desire to be autonomous Teacher Task

General Interventions: 2. Avoidant Attachment The teacher is associated with negative expectations – the child expects to be let down, or hurt. Thus ... The relationship between the pupil and the teacher is made safe by the presence of the task Therefore a well delivered lesson plan, made clear at the start and clear, structured tasks which can be completed with little help from the teacher can reduce the threat of ‘not knowing’ something and feeling unsupported. Concrete structured activities, with little call for imagination are safest Writing can be difficult for these individuals. Structured assignments with boxes may be preferred The presence of another child can moderate the intensity of the teachers proximity. Pairs or groups may help the child experience close proximity to the teacher.

Pupils who fear separation: 3. Insecure - Ambivalent Highly anxious Underachieving Attention Seeking Poor Concentration/ ignore the task Dependent on teacher support Fears Separation Hostile towards teacher if frustrated Task Teacher 22

General Interventions: 3. Ambivalent Attachment The child is preoccupied with their relationship with the adult and in being ‘held in mind’. To begin the process of change the child needs to engage with the task... Small independent steps – take turns with the pupil to show how to work alongside someone rather than merging with each other Modelling of turn taking A timer to indicate when the task is over and the relationship can continue (or clear guidance – “Answer the first three questions and I’ll come back and check.”). If you get distracted acknowledge what has happened (“I’m sorry I didn’t get back when we agreed, you probably thought I had forgotten about you, but I hadn’t”). Special objects – home and school Explicit comments across the classroom Small group work which facilitates working with others Warnings of changes and class movements Be aware of absenteeism

The Most Worrying Pupils: 4. Disorganised Attachment Controlling Intense Anxiety Underachieving Distrusting of Authority Likely to reject task or any educational challenge for fear of failing or not knowing Task Teacher 24

General Interventions: 4. Disorganised Attachment These children are highly vulnerable; they will need to experience sufficient containment, both physical and emotional. Care typically involves: Reliable and predictable routine A physical container or ‘secure base’ Regular praise and positive feedback Safety routines – minimum amount of staff involved Concrete objectives such as counting, colouring sorting, building structures, sequencing objects, copying etc. Sharing of known triggers and strategies

Key Adult The presence of a significant other in school can help overcome the adverse experiences in primary relationships Through access to an adult who will take a special interest in them, the child can experience their emotional states being contained and regulated by someone else. They will be soothed and freed up to learn. Once a child understands their own needs, views and feelings, they can become sensitive to the needs, views and feelings of others. Some children with significant attachment difficulties, where the child has experienced trauma or loss, may need a higher level of support in the form of a key adult scheme

Questions for school Leadership: A. Safety In what ways can your school provide a “safe haven” for children? When or where does your school not provide a safe haven for some children? Until a child feels safe, no learning can take place (physically and emotionally safe). PASS as a measure of child/young persons view of safety. Safety walks. Sense of belonging

B. Relationships Research draws attention to the significance of the pupil-teacher relationship in order to develop a positive emotional climate and an effective learning environment. Research on attachment suggests a relational rather than a behavioural framework for supporting children’s behaviour is more effective. All staff and key staff. Relationships in school. Children’s secure attachments with adults in school. How to support adults with this role in school. Child-centred: acknowledging children’s different attachment styles (and adult attachment styles) A relational framework acknowledges that all behaviour is a form of communication and adopts a no blame ethos. The importance of Repairing relationships. VIG and VERP

C. Emotional Resilience To be able to engage in learning a pupil needs to be able to take risks, to learn new things and face new challenges. A good learner needs to be able to manage frustration and anxiety, have good self esteem, be willing to take risks and be able to ask for help when needed. Emotion Coaching SEAL curriculum. Emotion coaching – see attachment aware schools: Dealing with emotions in the moment Strategies to deal with life’s ups and downs Empathisizing with and accepting negative emotions but not the behaviour Using moments of challenging behaviour as opportunities for teaching Building trusting and respectful relationships with children

D. Levels of support Creating an infrastructure for children with emotional needs (as we do for physical and learning impairments). Consistent thinking and practice across all school staff. Whole school approaches; targeted approaches and specialist support. How to involve all staff and families/wider community; induction of new staff Including Therapeutic interventions (being able to express what has happened – creating a narrative to make the memories safe) Pyramid approach – whole school, targeted approaches, specialist support How to monitor, evaluate and develop strategies and approaches Mindfulness

E. Transitions Importance of home-school partnership and views of the child Transition planning 4 to 6 months prior to transition even Introduce new staff early Keep key adult consistent through transition if at all possible Mark goodbyes and prepare for change Maintain links after transition Share information between staff Limit the number of changes Increase number of visits Transitions can be difficult for children, particularly those with unmet attachment needs and may trigger Pinful memories of loss and rejection, feelings of high anxiety, fear, grief or even terror. If poorly managed, these changes may lead to serious setback or trauma. e.g. staerting school, changing school, moving up year groups, changes in key staff or attachment figures

F. Supporting staff How to support adults working in schools with the difficult feelings that can arise when working with children who have experienced trauma and loss. How to provide space to step back and consider the needs of the child.

Staff support systems need to be: Whole school Monthly team supervision 1 to 1 supervision for high levels of trauma Informal debriefs for staff to problem-solve as required Staff supervision policy High quality ongoing CPD on Attachment Bomber 2009 and 2011

Useful books for the staff room Teenagers and Attachment – Margot Sunderland and Dan Hughes Attachment in the classroom – Heather Geddes Inside I’m hurting – Louise Bomber