WEEK 8: REVISION CALEB HUMPHREYS

FREE WRITE / READING (~10 MINUTES) Read the sample Draft 1.1 of the rhetorical analysis in your textbook. Pages What is this draft doing well? What areas do you think need to be revised?

HOUSEKEEPING Office hours this week – by appointment only on Thursday and Friday. There are only 6 weeks left. Draft 1.1 of your rhetorical analysis is due next Friday. Works Cited pages.

FORMATTING FOR WORKS CITED Last Name, First Name. “Title of the Article.” Original Publication Source (if given). Rpt. In _______. City: Publisher, Year. Page Numbers. Print. Steele, Shelby. “The New Sovereignty.” Rpt. in First-Year Writing: Writing in the Disciplines 8th Custom Edition TTU. Boston: Pearson, Print.

DRAFT 1.1 Please bring a completed (printed) draft of your rhetorical analysis to class next week. We will be doing peer review in class, for this to work, you must bring your copy of your draft and it must be complete. This will count as both a homework assignment and a quiz grade. Tip: Revise your Brief Assignments to make your Rhetorical Analysis.

DRAFT 1.1 (CONTINUED) Purpose: In the first half of the course, you have been honing your writing skills so as to prepare you for college level writing. You will use all of these skills, (summarizing, paraphrasing, critical reading, constructing thesis statements, and using supporting material via quotations) throughout your writing of this assignment. After selecting your text and critically reading it, you will determine the writer’s purpose and intended audience for the text.

DRAFT 1.1 (CONTINUED) You will begin to analyze the text to determine the specific strategies (rhetorical choices) the writer uses to achieve his or her purpose and to meet the needs of the audience. For example, you might choose to look at such elements as the types of evidence a writer puts forward and how he or she does so. Ask yourself if the writer uses evidence from sources, or if he or she tells stories from personal experience. Examine the sentence structures and word choice. How do these contribute to the author’s purpose? Evaluate the overall tone of the text, and determine how it does or does not contribute to the way in which it communicates to its audience. After you determine what these strategies or rhetorical choices are, consider how well these strategies (rhetorical choices) actually work.

DRAFT 1.1 (CONTINUED) Although this is an initial draft, it should be carefully edited and written in a professional tone. Please use MLA format for both your in-text citations and your works cited in this draft. Your draft should be 1200 words in length.

DRAFT 1.1 (CONTINUED) This draft is equivalent to two (2) Brief Assignments. Around 12% of your final grade. The final draft is around 18% of the final grade = ? The rhetorical analysis should focus on the rhetoric, not the content.

STRUCTURE OF DRAFT Introduction  Context and background information.  Introduce the article. Briefly discuss the author and summarize the main points of the article. Talk about the audience and purpose in depth. End with the thesis statement. 2.Body paragraphs  In the order that you have each choice listed in your thesis statement. Explain how the author uses the choice to persuade his audience. Make sure that you tie every point back to the audience. Limit the amount of summary here to what is absolutely necessary. 10

STRUCTURE OF DRAFT Conclusion  Restate (in different words) your thesis statement. Briefly reiterate your main points. Talk about the overall effect of the rhetoric. This essay is 1200 words, or around 4 typed, double-spaced pages. This could be in the form of a five paragraph essay, but you are not limited to this structure. Must include a works cited page. 11

GROUP WORK (10 MINUTES) As a group, discuss the preliminary draft you read. Try to come up with 3-5 major issues that need to be revised. Be prepared to discuss as a class.

WHAT TO LOOK FOR Grammar and Mechanics should be low on your list of priorities. Look first at content issues. Is the draft focused on rhetoric? What do you think of the identification of the purpose? Audience? Quote integration and evaluation. Topic sentences, thesis statement, hook, etc. 13

GROUP WORK Now, read the revised draft. Discuss:  1) whether the problems that you saw in the first draft were addressed  2) whether the revisions fixed other issues that you hadn’t noticed in the draft  3) why the revisions are or are not an improvement over the first draft.

BA6 Read the initial draft provided and then write an initial paragraph in which you discuss the problems that you see in the current draft. Next, read the revised draft and write another paragraph in which you discuss  1) whether the problems that you saw in the first draft were addressed  2) whether the revisions fixed other issues that you hadn’t noticed in the draft  3) why the revisions are or are not an improvement over the first draft.

BA6 (CONTINUED) If you believe other revisions should be made to the draft, conclude your assignment with an explanation of what those are and how the revisions should be made. Your discussion should be words in length.

BA.6: WORDS SECTION 1 Identify some problems with the first draft. Remember to keep a professional tone at all times. (This was written by one of your peers. Don’t be a jerk.) Be honest, but not harsh. SECTION 2 Discuss the revisions. What revision was done? Did they fix the problems in the first draft? Are they effective? Does more need to be done? If so, what? 17

HEMINGWAY Hemingway, a Nobel Prize winning author (also one of the best writers of all time), rewrote the ending to A Farewell to Arms almost 50 times. The point is that you are not Hemingway. If he had to rewrite this 50 times, then you will have to revise.