APPLYING THE SCIENCE OF HAPPINESS IN THE CONSULTING ROOM Bill O’Hanlon

Science of Happiness 2 Applying the Science of Happiness For a free copy of these PowerPoint slides, you may me at Be sure to specify the name of the workshop, the date and the place The presentation is not on my website, you must and request that it be sent to you Even if you do not have PowerPoint, you can download a free viewer The deal is: You get signed up for my newsletter in exchange for the free PowerPoint

Science of Happiness 3 Seligman’s List of Virtues  Wisdom and Knowledge  Courage  Love and Humanity  Justice  Temperance  Spirituality and Transcendence  Wisdom and Knowledge  Courage  Love and Humanity  Justice  Temperance  Spirituality and Transcendence

Science of Happiness 4 Love and Humanity  Kindness and generosity  Loving and allowing oneself to be loved  Kindness and generosity  Loving and allowing oneself to be loved

Science of Happiness 5 Transcendence  Appreciation of beauty and excellence  Gratitude  Hope, optimism, future mindedness  Spirituality, sense of purpose, faith, religiousness  Forgiveness and mercy  Playfulness and humor  Zest, passion and enthusiasm  Appreciation of beauty and excellence  Gratitude  Hope, optimism, future mindedness  Spirituality, sense of purpose, faith, religiousness  Forgiveness and mercy  Playfulness and humor  Zest, passion and enthusiasm

Science of Happiness 6 Meaning and Purpose in the Good Life  Elements of the meaningful life  The four life energies or signals  Mitzvah Therapy: It’s Not About You  Elements of the meaningful life  The four life energies or signals  Mitzvah Therapy: It’s Not About You

Science of Happiness 7 Elements of the Meaningful Life  Purpose  Contribution  Engaging work or activities  Finding meaning in suffering  Turning negative or hurtful events into happiness or satisfaction with positive connotations or meaning  Purpose  Contribution  Engaging work or activities  Finding meaning in suffering  Turning negative or hurtful events into happiness or satisfaction with positive connotations or meaning

Science of Happiness 8 The Meaningful Life and Happiness Several studies with older Americans find that one of the best predictors of happiness is whether or not a person thinks his or her life has a purpose. If they had no such sense of purpose, seven out of ten people studied felt unsettled about their lives; if they had a sense of purpose seven out of ten felt satisfied. Lepper, H. (1996). In Pursuit of Happiness and Satisfaction in Later Life: A Study of Competing Theories of Subjective Well-Being. Ph.D. Dissertation, UC Riverside.

Science of Happiness 9 The Meaningful Life and Happiness College students who enjoyed their lives and studies were compared to those who didn’t. The main difference was that those students who were happier had an underlying sense of purpose in life. Rahman, T.and Khaleque, A. (1996). “The purpose in life and academic behavior problem students,” Social Indicators Research, 39:59.

Science of Happiness 10 Finding Life Purpose or Direction Four signals or life energies: Blissed Blessed Pissed Dissed

Science of Happiness 11 The Four Life Signals Follow Your Bliss

Science of Happiness 12 The Four Life Signals 1&2 Blissed or Blessed Blissed or Blessed

Science of Happiness 13 The Four Life Signals 1 Blissed

Steve Jobs “You’ve got to find what you love. And that is true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know it when you find it.” Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma–which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Darwin’s bliss

Science of Happiness 16 The Four Life Signals 2 Blessed

People who believed in you, encouraged you or told you you were good at something or could do something Talents, developed or natural, that you have Incidents of good luck (being in the right place at the right time-and taking advantage of that luck)

Science of Happiness 18 The Four Soul Signals Blissed or Pissed Blissed or Pissed

Science of Happiness 19 The Four Soul Signals 3 & 4 Wounded/Cursed or Righteously Indignant/Dissatisfied Wounded/Cursed or Righteously Indignant/Dissatisfied

Science of Happiness 20 The Key Transforming the “negative” energy of anger and hurts into positive energy

Science of Happiness 21 Turning negatives into positives  Pissed (Righteously Indignant)  Dissed (Cursed/Wounded)  Mitzvah therapy  Pissed (Righteously Indignant)  Dissed (Cursed/Wounded)  Mitzvah therapy

Science of Happiness 22 The Four Soul Signals 3 Wounded/Cursed

Dissed Ken Tucker abusive father Rock and Movie Critic

Patsy Rodenberg Voice coach for actors and public speakers

Science of Happiness 25 Wounded Leonard Cohen: There ’ s a crack in everything. That ’ s how the light gets in. Leonard Cohen: There ’ s a crack in everything. That ’ s how the light gets in.

Science of Happiness 26 Ann Rice Daughter who died of leukemia at 5. Rice wrote a novel that featured a 5-year-old who could never die. (Interview with a Vampire)

Science of Happiness 27 Wounded We all leave childhood with wounds. In time we may transform our liabilities into gifts. The faults that pockmark the psyche may become the source of a man or a woman ’ s beauty. The injuries we have suffered invite us to assume the most human of all vocations — to heal ourselves and others. – Sam Keen

Science of Happiness 28 Wounded I thank God for my handicaps, for through them I have found myself, my work and my God. - Helen Keller Real suffering burns clean; neurotic suffering creates more and more soot. - Marion Woodman I thank God for my handicaps, for through them I have found myself, my work and my God. - Helen Keller Real suffering burns clean; neurotic suffering creates more and more soot. - Marion Woodman

Science of Happiness 29 Pissed  Martin Luther King  Nelson Mandela  Michael Moore  Tom Peters  Martin Luther King  Nelson Mandela  Michael Moore  Tom Peters

Science of Happiness 30 Pissed Righteous indignation  What would you talk about if given an hour of prime time television to influence the nation or the world?  What pisses you off that you would like to correct in the world or other people?  What can’t you sit still for? Righteous indignation  What would you talk about if given an hour of prime time television to influence the nation or the world?  What pisses you off that you would like to correct in the world or other people?  What can’t you sit still for?

Science of Happiness 31 Wounded/Cursed/Indignation to Direction  Where were you (or someone else) pissed on that pissed you off?  Where have you been wounded?  Where or about what have you been cursed?  How can you turn this wound or disrespect or curse into a blessing or contribution?  Where were you (or someone else) pissed on that pissed you off?  Where have you been wounded?  Where or about what have you been cursed?  How can you turn this wound or disrespect or curse into a blessing or contribution?

Science of Happiness 32 Compassion/Contribution/Service Mitzvah therapy The African Violet Queen Sol Gordon’s Abuse Victim M.A.D.D. Mitzvah therapy The African Violet Queen Sol Gordon’s Abuse Victim M.A.D.D.

Ghandi The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.

Albert Schweitzer You must give something to your fellow men. Even if it is a little thing, do something for those who have need of help, something for which you get no pay but the privilege of giving... The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Life's most persistent and urgent question is: What are you doing for others?

Science of Happiness 36 Relevant research Life satisfaction was shown to increase 24% with the level of altruistic activity in the person’s life. Williams, A., Haber, D., Weaver, G. and Freeman, J. (1998). “Altruistic activity,” Activities, Adaptation, and Aging, 22:31. Life satisfaction was shown to increase 24% with the level of altruistic activity in the person’s life. Williams, A., Haber, D., Weaver, G. and Freeman, J. (1998). “Altruistic activity,” Activities, Adaptation, and Aging, 22:31.

Contribution  Is there anywhere your client could be of service or make a contribution that would help them make amends or heal wounds?  Where do they give of themselves?  If they had to name their most significant contribution to helping another person or people, what would they say?  If they had to name the cause that they feel most passionate about, what would it be?  Become aware of some social injustice or victim situation that moves or touches you.  Every time you experience some recurrent problem, do one thing to contribute to the relief of the victim’s suffering or to righting some social injustice. It may be writing a letter, making a donation of money or time to some charitable group, praying, or some other action you are moved to.  Is there anywhere your client could be of service or make a contribution that would help them make amends or heal wounds?  Where do they give of themselves?  If they had to name their most significant contribution to helping another person or people, what would they say?  If they had to name the cause that they feel most passionate about, what would it be?  Become aware of some social injustice or victim situation that moves or touches you.  Every time you experience some recurrent problem, do one thing to contribute to the relief of the victim’s suffering or to righting some social injustice. It may be writing a letter, making a donation of money or time to some charitable group, praying, or some other action you are moved to.

Science of Happiness 38 How to apply this to changework  Help people find their life directions, meaning and purpose by helping them identify the signal(s) that drive them  Help people find activities that contribute to others or the world  Help people find their life directions, meaning and purpose by helping them identify the signal(s) that drive them  Help people find activities that contribute to others or the world

Science of Happiness 39 Applying The Science of Happiness This PowerPoint presentation was created by Bill O’Hanlon © You have my permission to use it for non-commercial purposes (like sharing it with your colleagues or studying it yourself). If you want to use it in any commercial (money-making) activities, please contact me for permission and discussion.