MAN UP BIBLE SERIES Men Who Matter Lesson Five

The Real World Do you love your wife? Yes is always the correct answer and one we just throw out with out any real thought. Love can be a tricky thing. Sometimes you feel it and at other times you just know it. Now lets dig a little deeper. Do you like your wife? Why is that a harder question? Because people change. The women you married out of high school is not the woman you see now. To be even more blunt… You are no prize yourself. Years add on much more than pounds and wrinkles. Life has a way of stealing so much of life from us. As Men who Matter, we must determine that our wives, the one we made that covenant of marriage with, are worth the investment of our time and attention. It has to move from the have to. It must become a want to. Let's see what the Bible has for us..

The Real Word Ephesians 5:21-33New International Version (NIV) Instructions for Christian Households 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing [a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” [b] 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.ab

Real Talk Is there a difference between liking and loving your wife? Are you and your wife Growing apart or Together? How can you change the direction your marriage is going? How do you deal with the incompatibilities in marriage?

Real Steps 12 Ways to Cherish Your Wife : 1. Sacrifice for her. Be willing to give up something you would like, or something that you would like to do, in order to please her. Give her the biggest piece of pie, the last chocolate in the box, your comfy chair, or the keys to your new car. 2. Listen to her. Accept what she says. Be interested. Don't nag. Give her plenty of eyeball-to-eyeball communication—the same kind you give to other people who sit across your desk. 3. Touch her. Most women enjoy a gentle touch from their husbands, both at home and in public. Hold her hand. Put your arm around her waist. You don't have to make a spectacle of yourself; just let your touch show others that your primary interest is centered on your wife. 4. Be with her in public. Don't leave her alone in a crowd and go off to talk with people you are interested in. Be seen together. 5. Say kind things about her in public. Never criticize. Never demean. Uplift. If you say enough kind things about your wife, she is bound to overhear occasion ally or it's bound to get back to her. Public support of each other is as important as private support to the husband and wife. 6. Share her responsibilities. Ask her what she would like you to do for her. Surprise her with your thoughtfulness. It's easy for a man to become so accustomed to delegating responsibilities that he forgets he needs to do some volunteer work himself around the house. 7. Let her know you admire her. Tell her how attractive she is, how talented, how kind. Admire her body and her personality. When is the last time you winked at your wife, or whistled? You're too old? I don't believe that! 8. Show respect. It's not old fashioned to open doors for your wife and to carry things for her. And even if it were, women love "old-fashioned" men. 9. Be an understanding father. Many a wife complains, "Why does he say all the right things when he's at the corps and have a sudden lapse of memory when he walks in the front door? “ 10. Open doors of possibility for your wife. Don't just think of your own career and advancement. What about hers? Is there anything you could do to help her fulfill her God-given potential? Why not make an appointment with your wife and discuss this question? 11. Take time to be alone with her. Take her on a romantic weekend trip. No kids! You arrange the baby-sitting for a change, and you do the packing. Make this an annual affair. 12. Be the spiritual leader of your family. Did you know that one study revealed that women felt that the biggest fault of men was that they were religious shirkers? Don't let this be true of you!

Time to Close As I close this lesson I feel I need to talk to you about an issue that continues to grow and that is the trend towards Emotional Infidelity. Billy Graham had a very strict rule in his ministry; He was never alone with a women anywhere except his wife and children. Why? To protect his ministry and the potential for emotional attachments with those of the opposite sex. We no longer have to have contact with a women or man to carry out infidelity. It happens on the computer, tablet and phone. It happens in those early morning meetings that continue day after day and the extra long lunches. Guys, lets guard our hearts as Men Who Matter, must make the right choices as it relates to our intimate relationships. Save them for your wives. It is really Time to MAN UP!