Anti-Bullying 8th Grade

Definition Bullying is when kids hurt or scare other kids on purpose, and it is repeated over time. When bullying occurs there is an imbalance of power between the two students. Stopbullying.gov Bullying can include various types of behavior from physical attacks, to destroying one's personal property or clothing, verbal abuse, starting rumors, slam books, name calling, verbal attacks online as well as other forms of cyber-bullying.

Bullying Then & Now While Bullying still takes on many of the traditional forms, it has also evolved since we were in middle school. H. Priebe-Diaz, Human Relations, Diversity & Equity

Types of Bullying Verbal Bullying Non-Verbal Bullying Physical Bullying Relational Bullying Cyber Bullying There are three kinds of bullying: verbal, physical, and relational. All three can pack a wallop alone but are often combined to create a more powerful attack. Verbal abuse is the most common form of bullying used by both boys and girls. It accounts for 70 percent of reported bullying. Boys and girls use verbal bullying equally. . It accounts for 70 percent of reported bullying. Non Verbal Posturing, making gang signs, leering, staring, stalking, destroying property. Boys tend to use physical bullying more often than girls do, and girls use relational bullying more often than boys. The most difficult to detect from the outside, relational bullying is the systematic diminishment of a bullied child’s sense of self through ignoring, isolating, excluding, or shunning. Coloroso, Barbara (2010). The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School--How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle (Updated Edition) (p. 14). HarperCollins e-books. Kindle Edition.

Cyber Bullying Stop- Block- Facebook, emails, text messages, IM, Ask FM, any electron form of communication NOTE: Cyber bullying is more than a school issue it is a legal issue. Police can become involved if it is founded that cyber bullying has occurred Stop- Block- Tell- Stop- Stop communicating Block- Block them from your contacts Tell- Tell an adult

3 Roles 1. Bully 2. Bullied 3. Bystander

The Bully Bullying is not about anger. It’s not even about conflict. It’s about contempt—a powerful feeling of dislike toward somebody considered to be worthless, inferior, or undeserving of respect. Kids who bully have an air of superiority that is often a mask to cover up deep hurt and a feeling of inadequacy. They rationalize that their supposed superiority entitles them to hurt someone they hold in contempt, when in reality it is an excuse to put someone down so they can feel “up.” Contempt comes packaged with three apparent psychological advantages that allow kids to harm another human being without feeling empathy, compassion, or shame: A sense of entitlement—the privilege and right to control, dominate, subjugate, and otherwise abuse another human being. An intolerance toward differences—different equals inferior and thus not worthy of respect. A liberty to exclude—to bar, isolate, and segregate a person deemed not worthy of respect or care.

Teasing vs Taunting Teasing is a fun thing you do with friends—with people you care about. Taunting is a choice to bully someone for whom you have contempt. Coloroso, Barbara (2010). The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School--How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle (Updated Edition) (p. 32). HarperCollins e-books. Kindle Edition. It is more helpful to give kids two different words to describe two different activities. TEASING Allows the teaser and person teased to swap roles with ease. , Isn’t intended to hurt the other person. Maintains the basic dignity of everyone involved. Pokes fun in a lighthearted, clever, and benign way. Is meant to get both parties to laugh. Is only a small part of the activities shared by kids who have something in common. Is innocent in motive. Is discontinued when person teased becomes upset or objects to the teasing. TAUNTING Is based on an imbalance of power and is one-sided: the bully taunts, the bullied kid is taunted. Is intended to harm. Involves humiliating, cruel, demeaning, or bigoted comments thinly disguised as jokes. Includes laughter directed at the target, not with the target. Is meant to diminish the sense of self-worth of the target. Induces fear of further taunting or can be a prelude to physical bullying. Is sinister in motive. Continues especially when targeted kid becomes distressed or objects to the taunt.

77% of students have admitted to being a victim of bullying The Bullied Student 77% of students have admitted to being a victim of bullying The bullied student feels: unworthy of respect, unpopular, isolated, shamed. 77% of students have admitted to being a victim of bullying The bully intends to make the target feel unworthy of respect, unpopular, isolated, and shamed. Boys are less likely than girls to tell an adult. Boys are culturally inculcated with the idea that they are supposed to “take it,” “be strong,” and “go it alone,” in concert with “Don’t cry” and “Don’t go running to Mama,” two of society’s traditional admonitions. Coloroso, Barbara (2010). The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School--How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle (Updated Edition) (p. 49). HarperCollins e-books. Kindle Edition.

Bystander Over 6 million American students have been bullied in the past six months. Whether you cheer on the bully, or silently watch, you are supporting the bully. “The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it.” Albert Einstein

“Mind Movie” Close your eyes. Listen carefully. Picture the story in your head. We’re going to do a “mind-Movie” activity. You will each create a movie in your own mind about what it would be like if nobody did anything to stop bullying. Close your eyes and listen carefully as I read. Keep your eyes closed until I tell you to open them. Create a movie in your mind.

“Mind Movie” What are some of the things you saw in your mind movie? What was it like to go to school there? How did younger students treat older students? How did you feel about living and going to school there? Imagine this: You have just moved to a new town and are attending a new school. You notice that bullying happens often- both at school and away from school. Adults don’t help at all. Children don’t care, so they don’t do anything about it either. It’s as if no one even notices that bullying is happening all the time In this town, bullying goes completely unchecked-- nobody does anything to stop it. Think about the following questions: (1) What was it like to go to school there? (2) How do older students treat younger students? (3) What is it like to make friends?

PSA: THE PRICE OF SILENCE Bystander now lets watch a video about a school where students DO notice the bulling. A place where they DO step in. PSA: THE PRICE OF SILENCE

Bullying Circle A. Bully/Bullies—who start the bullying and take an active part. B. Followers/Henchmen—who take an active part but do not start the bullying. C. Supporters: Passive Bully/Bullies—who support the bullying but do not take an active part. D. Passive Supporters: Possible Bully/Bullies—who like the bullying but do not display open support. In the middle between left and right: E. Disengaged Onlookers—who watch what happens; say, “It is none of my business” don’t take a stand. On the right side of the circle: F. Possible Defenders—who dislike the bullying and think they ought to help out (but don’t do it). And the one group who are not bystanders: G. Defenders of the Target—who dislike the bullying and help or try to help the one who is exposed—the target. Coloroso, Barbara (2010). The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School--How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle (Updated Edition) (pp. 65-66). HarperCollins e-books. Kindle Edition.

Bystander reactions Peers reinforced the bullying in 81 percent of the episodes. Peers were more respectful and friendly toward the bullies than the targets. Peers were active participants in 48 percent of the episodes. Peers intervened in only 13 percent of the episodes at which they were present. Coloroso, Barbara (2010). The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School--How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle (Updated Edition) (p. 66). HarperCollins e-books. Kindle Edition.

Reasons for NOT intervening Afraid of getting hurt Bully is bigger and stronger Afraid of making it worse Afraid of becoming a new target The question that begs to be asked is, Why would 81 percent of the kids who would not instigate bullying be so willing to become a part of the attack or turn a blind eye to the plight of the targeted child? There are a few valid reasons and lots of excuses. The four reasons most often given for not intervening: The bystander is afraid of getting hurt himself. The bully is bigger and stronger and has a reputation that justifies the fear; so jumping into the melee doesn’t appear to be a smart thing to do. The bystander is afraid of becoming a new target of the bully. Even if the bystander is able to intervene successfully, there is a chance she will be singled out at a later date for retribution. Bullies are quick to disparage and malign anyone who tries to intervene. The bystander is afraid of doing something that will only make the situation worse. The bystander does not know what to do. He hasn’t been taught ways to intervene, to report the bullying, or to help the target. Just as bullying is a learned behavior, so must children be taught ways to stop it. FEAR

What to do Do something besides watching. Tell an adult. If you can, stand up to the bully and let them know that it's not okay. Try to diffuse the situation. Support the victim. Let them know you care and you don't think what happened to them was fair or right. Encourage students to become the DEFENDER we saw in the Bullying Circle

RECOGNIZE REFUSE REPORT Three R’s : Recognize whether the incident is “Bullying” or something else Refuse the bullying behavior Report situation to office as needed REFUSE REPORT

How to make a report Teacher Counselor/ Student Assist. Principal Communicate with the teacher what happened Counselor/ Assist. Principal Write a Statement Investigation Follow up Student Counselor/Teaching respect and building resiliency Bullied- advocating for themselves Encourage the student to make a report Bystander- standing up for what is right “Courage to Lead”

Bullying Report Process 1. Target/ Bystander makes a report by filling out a witness statement 2. Counseling support will be offered if the student is in crisis 3. Investigation is conducted by Assistant Principal Cooper 4. If bullying has occurred it is documented and consequences are given

You Decide At lunch, two 8th grade boys are pushing a 6th grader. You’ve seen them bump into him before during passing period. You are a bystander. What will you do? Read the “You Decide” scenario to the group. Ask for possible answers. Consider having them pair up and come up with an answer, then call on a group

You Decide Samantha is your friend. She has been gossiping about Stephanie, a student in your Basic Ed class. She just told you and several others that Stephanie’s parents are drug addicts. You are a bystander. What will you do? Read the “You Decide” scenario to the group. Ask for possible answers. Consider having them pair up and come up with an answer, then call on a group

You Decide Julie sits in front of you in Science class. She makes rude comments to Joshua who sits next to her. She tells him that he’s “so stupid”, rolls her eyes at him, and talks about his clothes to her friends. You are a bystander. What will you do? Read the “You Decide” scenario to the group. Ask for possible answers. Consider having them pair up and come up with an answer, then call on a group

You Decide Daniel is a eighth-grader. He is very popular and has several other guys who follow him around a lot. He keeps bothering the girl who sits in front of him on the bus. He tries to grab her private parts and flip up her skirt. You are a bystander. What will you do? Read the “You Decide” scenario to the group. Ask for possible answers. Consider having them pair up and come up with an answer, then call on a group

REVIEW - What can you do if you witness bullying at school? What is the definition of bullying? Out of the 3 roles of bullying, the Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander, who has the greatest impact in helping to end bullying? How can a bystander help end bullying? How do you make a report of bullying?

Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” - Margaret Mead

Everyone has the right to feel safe coming to school Everyone has the right to feel safe coming to school. Our school is a great place to learn, play and have friends. Nobody likes to be bullied