THE FAMILY: HOW FAR DOES IT EXTEND? SOC 3300 – Social Inequality Dr. Mary Cay Sengstock, Ph.D., C.C.S. Professor of Sociology Wayne State University

WHO MAKES UP A FAMILY? CAN SOCIETY PLACE LIMITS? What is a Family? How Does a Family Get Formed? Who Decides This? Is It Society? Is It the Government? Is it God? Is It the Family Members Themselves? Is It All of These? … Or None?

RANGE OF CROSS-CULTURAL DEFINITIONS OF FAMILY Families Have Been Defined Very Broadly Across Societies – to Mention a Few: Extended – Nuclear Monogamous – Polygamous Arranged – Individually Chosen Matriarchal – Patriarchal Focus on Marriage – Focus on Child-Rearing Life-Long – Able to Be Modified

TRADITIONAL VIEW OF “FAMILY” IN JUDEO-CHRISTIAN SOCIETY Based on Marriage Monogamous: 1 Man to 1 Woman – With Lots of Leeway for MALE Extramarital Relations! Arranged – Until Very Recently Much Extended Family Involvement Closely Tied to Religious Beliefs, Traditions Both Church & Government Involved Major Example of Institutional Interrelations! Family Established by Society, Religion, Reinforced by Government Regulations

GAY RIGHTS MOVEMENT & THE FAMILY Gay Males/Lesbians Exist Throughout History Openly Gay Rights – Origins: Late 20 th Century – Stonewall Riots, Greenwich Village, NY, 6/28/1969 – Gays Resisted Unfair Treatment by Police Gay Rights Issue: Heterosexual Marriage – By 1989, 86% of Gays Supported Gay Marriage Pressure on Government to Open Marriage to Gays, Lesbians

CONTROVERSY AMONG GAYS: TO JOIN MARRIAGE – OR DESTROY IT? Early Gay Rights Activists (Like Feminists): Sought to “Liberate” Gays, Women from Injustices of the Traditional Family Later: Vigorous Pro-Family Movement in Gay/Lesbian Circles … Enable Gays/Lesbians to Enjoy All the Rights of Traditional Marriage/Family

WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF MARRIAGE/FAMILY? Taxes: Married People Get Tax Breaks Insurance: Listed on Other’s Insurance Policy Health Benefits: Get Spouse Health Benefits Inheritance: Inherit from Partner by Right Right to Care for Partner When Ill Decision-Making: Make E.O. Health Decisions Child Care Rights – Care for Partner’s Children Adoption: Right to Adopt Children Together

WHAT CONSTITUTES A “GAY FAMILY”? Family in Which Everyone Is Gay or Lesbian? Family Headed by Gay or Lesbian Partners? Can There Be a Single Parent Gay Family? What About a Family in Which Someone Is Gay or Lesbian? These Would Include Families of: – Ronald Reagan – Phyllis Schlafly – Colin Powell – Newt Gingrich – Maybe Yours? – Mine? Persons from Families Including Gay Members More Supportive of Gay Rights

ATTITUDES TOWARD GAY FAMILIES Fundamentalists: – (Conservative Protestants; Catholics; Orthodox Jews) : – We Must Love Them – but “Convert Them” – Some Believe in Ostracizing Them Until “Reform” – Training Programs to Assist in Reform More Liberal Religions: – (Reform Jews, Traditional Christians) : – May Perform Marriages, Commitment Ceremonies

GAY FAMILIES – HOW MANY? How Many Children in U.S. Live With Gay/Lesbian Parents? 1980s – Estimated: Million Born of Artificial Insemination … or Children of Divorced Parents – Now Living With Gay/Lesbian Partnerships

$100,000 QUESTION Which Is Better? – Have These Children In Stable Homes … with – Parents Who Love, Support & Care for Them... or – Take Them Away & Put Them in Foster Homes? What About Adoptions? Better to … – Let Them Be Adopted By Loving Gay Partners … or – Force Them to Remain in Foster Care? – NOTE: Adoptive Homes Usually at a Premium!

CHANGING MARRIAGE: PERSISTENT CHALLENGE EX: Anti-Miscegenation Laws Persistent Throughout the Southern States 20 States Still Had Racial Restrictions in 1967 Loving v. Virginia: Finally U.S. Supreme Court Declared Racial Restrictions on Marriage Unconstitutional U.S. Social Institutions (Family, Religion, Politics) Became More Protective of Marriage

A NEW CONTROVERSY FOR GAY RIGHTS ACTIVISTS What Is the Most Politically Useful Agenda? Is the Fight for Gay Marriage Worth the Animosity it Very Likely Will Generate? Should Gay Marriage Occupy Center Stage in Gay Rights? Or Are Other Issues More Important? – EX: Work Force Rights, Military, Income, etc. Or Are All Rights a “Seamless Web”?

BACKGROUND OF GAY MARRIAGE FIGHT 1998: 21 States Had Anti-Sodomy Laws 1970s: Gay Couples Sought to Use Loving v. Virginia to Marry Baehr v. Lewin (Hawaii) Gay Marriage Suit State of Hawaii Response: Marriage Only for Opposite Sex Partners Hawaii Sup. Ct: State Must Show “Compelling State Interest” to Maintain Gender Bias

“STATE COMPELLING INTEREST” ARGUMENT 1.Protect Health, Welfare of Children, Others 2.Foster Procreation within Marital Context 3.Securing/Assuring Acceptance of Hawaii Marriages Elsewhere 4.Protect State of HI Against Foreseeable Impact of HI Same Sex Laws 5.Protect Civil Liberties of HI Citizens Against Effects of HI Same Sex Approval

OUTCOME OF HAWAIIAN GAY MARRIAGE ISSUE Hawaiian Legislature Redefined Marriage to Include Only Opposite Sex Couples … Anticipating Court Rejection … Hawaiian Electorate Passed Amendment to State Constitution (69%-28%) … Establishing Legislative Right to Limit Marriage to Opposite Sex Couples New Baehr v. Miike Adjudicated  Supported State Right to Limit Marriage

GAY MARRIAGE RIGHT: NATIONAL LEVEL Same Pattern Across Nation: – Gay Couples Sue to Marry  – Courts Rule in Favor  – Religious & Political Conservatives Introduce Amendments to State Constitutions Major Example of Institutional Interaction: – Family – Religion – Government – Politics – To Maintain Existing Systems of Inequality

ARGUMENTS FOR LEGITIMIZING GAY & LESBIAN MARRIAGES 1.Would Promote Democratic & Pluralistic Expansion of U.S. Marriage … e.g., 2.Meaning … Practice … Politics of Family Life 3.Help Supplant the “Destructive Sanctity” of “the Family” … 4.With Respect for Diverse & Vibrant Families 5.Not Just for Gay Families, But for All Families 6.Even Minimal Rights to Gay Relations Would Support Gay Teens, Prevent Suicide

ALTERNATIVE VIEW Of Course, This Approach Would Not Be Acceptable to Those Who Believe In & Support the Existing, Traditional, Conservative View of “The Family” … i.e. The Family As Male-Dominated, Structure … Operating As Presumably Created By God … With Females & Children Submissive to Males 2 Diametrically Opposed Views of “Family”

POSSIBLE CONSEQUENCES OF LEGALIZING GAY MARRIAGES Supreme Court Docket Would Be Busy for Years to Come! Gay Marriage Laws in Some States Would Threaten Anti-Sodomy Laws in Others Policing Marital Sex Difficult Differential Prosecution of Same & Opposite Sex Couples Violates Equal Protection Clause Challenges of State Barriers to Gay Couple Custody, Adoption, Fertility, Inheritance, etc.

ADVANTAGES OF LEGALIZING GAY MARRIAGE Consider Possibility of Alternate Family Forms: Dismantle Family’s Gender & Sexual Injustices – Friendship As Base for Marriage v. Sex? Value Intimate Bonds Over Sexual Bonds Consider New Options for Marriage & Kinship Extended Family v. Nuclear Form? If 2 Parent Family is Better Than Single Parent … Might 3 (or 4) Parent Be Better Than 2?

OTHER FORMS OF MARRIAGE, FAMILIES IN THE PAST Extended Family Patterns (Ethnic Groups) Fictive Kin – Common with African-Americans Compadres, Commadres (Hispanics) Are There Forms That Might Be More Effective, Given Strains of Modern Society? “Functionally Extended Families” of Many Ethnic Groups – Allow Them Same Rights Now Accorded to Married Couples Or Use Our Collective Imagination!