Robert E. Emery University of Virginia Professor of Psychology and Author The Truth about Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive New York: Viking/Penguin, 2004

Some Nuanced Truths about Children and Divorce Children do best in happy married families and most children do equally well in happy divorced families Children do best in happy married families and most children do equally well in happy divorced families Divorce poses risks for children and most children from divorced families are resilient Divorce poses risks for children and most children from divorced families are resilient Parental conflict is toxic after separation and in marriage Parental conflict is toxic after separation and in marriage We can encourage happy marriage and we can help divorced and single parent families We can encourage happy marriage and we can help divorced and single parent families

Take Home Policy Points Encourage diverse, happy, even “good enough” marriage, if only through public discussion Encourage diverse, happy, even “good enough” marriage, if only through public discussion Goal: Make marriage better, not divorce worse Goal: Make marriage better, not divorce worse Support cooperative parenting through divorce with mediation, education, unified family courts Support cooperative parenting through divorce with mediation, education, unified family courts Goal: Happy two-parent family after divorce Goal: Happy two-parent family after divorce Really focus on children Really focus on children On the responsibilities not the “rights” of parents On the responsibilities not the “rights” of parents Goal: Parents need to be parents, so kids can be kids Goal: Parents need to be parents, so kids can be kids