Marriage and Family Relations HPER F258

Small group activity Draw a horizontal line on a sheet of paper. At the left end of the line, put your birth date. At the right end, put a projected death date. Break the line into equal parts (e.g., decades) Put your current age wherever it fits on the line. Leading up to your present age, put dates of significant events on the line. From your current age, put events you anticipate roughly where they “should” be. Discuss in small group..

The Process of Change in the Family

Anticipated/normative change Things to remember from family systems the epigenesis principle Stability vs. change (AKA morphostasis vs. morphogenesis) Equilibration vs equilibrium Also, remember that there are normal developmental tasks that are tied to one’s individual stage of development and the stage of family development

Family life cycle -- "U-shaped curve“ Joining of family through marriage -- satisfaction is high Families with young children – satisfaction begins to lower Families with adolescents – satisfaction hits the lowest point Launching and moving on -- Recovery in satisfaction begins Families in later life -- satisfaction can be lower, the same, or higher, depending on various factors (e.g., health, environment)

Problems with the family life cycle model Not representative of the reality of families Doesn’t reflect reality of blended families, single parent families through divorce, single parent families without marriage, couples who can’t marry, families without children, couples who marry at an old age,couples with great age disparity, etc. Creates a sense of not being “normal” if family is different, suggests pathology if different from this image.

Alternative: Think in terms of progression through stages of complexity, instead of a single, norming cycle, and an adjustment to altered status

Unanticipated/non-normative change Those you can’t plan for or anticipate Unusual and unexpected change More likely to be experienced as a crisis Will result in the family life course being changed (e.g., divorce and remarriage)

Important points to keep in mind… Most change in families is gradual and relatively invisible We notice and remember crises because they are so visible to us. We don’t remember normative changes

Transitions Transitions are marked by a period of rapid, often dramatic change, followed by periods of relative stability. The stability periods are stages. Transitions are generally known and recognizable and may require change in roles, rules and relationships. Can be either normative/predictable or non- normative/unpredictable. To be a family transition, they involve the entry or exit of a family member and/or the alteration of family roles.

Article facilitation – change/transitioning as an ongoing phenomenon In your small groups, discuss article # 20, “After the Bliss” Keep in mind the focus of this unit is on change and transitions. Why do you think this is such a difficult family transition to cope with?

Helping Families Deal with Transitions

Anticipatory Socialization Families are better able to make successful transitions if they can anticipate and learn about the transition before it happens. Timing is important. Look for teachable moments. Value in the education and preparation for family member(s) in transition

Role Strain Principle Role strain – the difficulty people experience when they try to conform to the demands of a role. The Role Strain Principle: The greater the strain experienced in a role, the more difficult the transitions into the role and the easier the transitions out of it.

What creates role strain? Ambiguity and uncertainty Conflicting expectations Examples of role strain:

What can people do to avoid or reduce Role Strain? Talk to others who have successfully completed the transition. Get role clarity and role consensus. Periodically take a look at your role demands to determine if there is over-commitment.

Rites of Passage Rites of passage and rituals can help with this lack of clarity surrounding roles during transitional times. Examples of rites of passage:

Role transition Shifting into and out of a role involves a change in how family members view themselves Anticipatory socialization is essential to making the transition smoothly. Rites of passage and other rituals can help with this lack of clarity during transitional times These help with the individual’s transitioning and with the social network recognizing it

Small groups In your group, talk about transitions you have experienced and whether or not they were difficult. Why do you think they were easy or difficult? How did other members of your family handle the same transition? Brainstorm ideas that can help ease times of transition.