LOVE, MARRIAGE AND FAMILY What the Bible Says about Marriage and Family Pastor Albert Clavo February 5, 2012

Ephesians 2:19-22 Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God’s people and members of God’s people and members of God’s household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.

BIBLICAL BLUEPRINT FOR MARRIAGE Marriage is a one flesh covenant between one man and one woman. Matthew 19:4-6 “Haven’t you heard,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

BIBLICAL ADMONITION FOR COUPLES Marriage is designed to be a mutually uplifting and satisfying lifetime relationship. Colossians 3:18,19 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. Ephesians 5:21-23 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

BIBLICAL BLUEPRINT FOR FAMILY The family is to be an environment where God is honored and his words are lived out. Colossians 3:12-17 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

BIBLICAL ADMONITION FOR CHILDREN The child’s responsibility is to obey and honor his /her parents. Colossians 3:20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Ephesians 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother – which is the first commandment with a promise – that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Study hard and finish school Find a job and be productive Be respectful of your parents and siblings Avoid untimely and unhealthy relationship entanglements

BIBLICAL ADMONITION FOR PARENTS The parent’s responsibility is to train and encourage their children. Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

ISSUE NO. 1 What if the husband/father does not recognize Christ’s Lordship over his life and his family? How can the wife submit to him? How can his children obey him? 1 Peter 1:1,2 Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect. Pray Share the gospel with love and respect Seek Godly counsel for specific application of God’s word

ISSUE NO. 2 What if one of your children does not recognize Christ’s Lordship over his life and refuses to live out biblical principles? What can a parent do? Romans 2:4 Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness leads you toward repentance? Pray Share the gospel with love and respect Seek Godly counsel for specific application of God’s word

ISSUE NO. 3 Before I came to Christ, I hurt my spouse and children with words and actions. What do I do now? 2 Corinthians 7:10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 2 Peter 3:18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen. Repent Mature in your faith Seek Godly counsel for specific application of God’s word

ISSUE NO. 4 Our marriage is not what I thought it would be/ Our marriage is not what it used to be. Is it time to go separate ways? Malachi 2:13-16 Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. “I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel, “and I hate a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment,” says the Lord Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith. No Don’t hide. Seek help. Pray Seek Godly counsel for specific application of God’s word

ISSUE NO. 5 I am now in my second marriage. My previous one was dissolved (either by divorce or annulment). How does this apply to me? 2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! You cannot rewrite history

APPLICATION What do these verses tell you to do and to pray for? 1 Kings 8:58 May he turn our hearts to him, to walk in all his ways and to keep the commands, decrees and regulations he gave our fathers. Malachi 4:6a He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers…