Self-Esteem North Carolina Cooperative Extension

The Importance of Taking Care of Yourself Your beliefs about yourself will influence your effectiveness in nurturing self-esteem in others. Much of your success and happiness in life will be determined by your level of self-esteem. Strong, positive relationships with your spouse and children depend on you having a relatively high self-esteem.

The Importance of Taking Care of yourself Launch an exercise program Get adequate sleep Fuel your body with balanced nutrition Develop a hobby Take a class for the pure enjoyment of learning something new Learn to relax Buy some new clothes Change hair styles Pamper yourself Read good, positive literature Take time to play Join a club Participate in church activities etc.

Children & self-esteem Your words and actions should convey these messages: –I want to be your mother (or father). –I am interested in you and what happens to you. –I enjoy being with you. –You are a unique person with your own strengths and weaknesses. –You do not have to be different for me to accept you. –You and I have a relationship that is important to me.

Show Your Children How Important They Are Be available to your children Involve them in your interests and hobbies Show interest in their activities

Your Own Self-beliefs I've got to be perfect if I am to be a good parent. I've got to be the boss. I must be in control and in charge all the time. My children are the products of my will. My children must like me all the time. If they don't I will feel depressed and discouraged. My personal value does not depend on how perfect I am as a parent. We all make mistakes. My children are individuals. They make choices independent of my will. I can slowly grant more and more independence to my children as they grow older. I enjoy being loved by my children, but I can survive without their complete approval. I must do what I think is right even though they might become upset.

Quick Questions T____ F____ 1. Your beliefs about yourself have nothing to do with your ability to nurture self-esteem in others. T____ F____ 2. A high level of self-esteem will probably do more than anything else to make you happy. T____ F____ 3. Children's self-esteem is determined primarily by the interactions with their parents.

Positive Esteem Builders Make fresh starts. Seek solitude. Listen carefully. Keep dreaming. Welcome challenges. Care for your body. Expect the best. Reach for the top. Trust, believe, have faith. Keep a light heart. Be here now. Behold beauty everywhere.

Action Plan for Strengthening Self-Esteem Find a model Use positive self-talk Visualize the new you.

Quick Questions True or False? 1. Self-esteem is so ingrained at an early age that it is impossible to change how you feel about yourself. 2. Difficult situations and the hardships of life work to tear down your positive self-esteem. 3. Mentally visualizing changes in yourself can help bring those changes about.