Travel Guide to Practices of Modern Chinese Families Ancestor Veneration Birth Ceremonies Names Homes Family Structure Weddings Death and Mourning

Ancestor Veneration You are at a cemetery near Beijing watching members of a Chinese family, who are gathered around the tombstone of their parents. You notice that they have cleaned the stone and are repainting the names engraved on it in red paint.

The honoring of deceased family members is an important part of Chinese life. Every April 5, families observe Tomb-Sweeping Day. On this day, family members go to the graves of their ancestors early in the morning. They sweep the graves free of dirt, and place offerings of food and wine in front of the tombs. Family members paint over the names on the tombstones with red paint for good luck. The Chinese believe the deceased will curse or help their descendents based on how well they have been honored.

Birth Ceremonies You are standing in front of an egg vendor at a market stall in northwestern China. As you approach the vendor, you notice that the boiled eggs he is selling are colored red.

Traditionally, the birth of a child is a joyous event in China. Many parents announce the child’s arrival by placing a marker on the front door. If the child is a boy, they put a bow on the left side of the door. If it is a girl, they place a handkerchief on the right side.

When the child is one month old, the naming ceremony takes place. The Chinese wait a month because in olden times many children died before they were a month old. Parents send red eggs to relatives and friends to announce the birth and upcoming celebration.

Names You are in a hospital in eastern China looking at newborn babies. You have been told that the tags attached to the babies’ blankets contain vital information, such as their gender, weight, and the names of their mothers.

Chinese names differ from Western names in many ways. Chinese surnames, or last names, come before first, or given names. For example, if a person’s given name is Mei-ling, and her surname is Li, people would call her “Li Mei-ling”.

All Chinese given names have a specific meaning. The meaning might relate to the place of birth, the name of a relative or friend, or a desirable characteristic. For instance, girls’ names are often based on flowers or beautiful objects. Boys’ names often indicate strength or courage.

Homes You are in a rural area in central China looking at the exterior of a traditional Chinese home.

The design of traditional Chinese homes reflects the idea that the family exists as one unit. Rather than facing outward towards the neighborhood, Chinese homes face inward and are often surrounded by walls that allow only the rooftops to be visible from the outside.

Entering a home involves passing through a gate, stepping over a raised threshold, and usually walking around a screen. The raised threshold is a one foot high barrier that prevents water, mud, and debris from entering the home, but it serves another purpose as well: keeping out ghosts and evil spirits!

Many Chinese believe that ghosts hover a few inches above the ground and move in a straight line, unable to move up or down, or turn right or left. It is believed that any unwanted spirits that pass through the gate are prevented from entering the house by the raised threshold, which is too high for them to cross.

Family Structure You are in northern China watching members of a family pose for a photograph. As you watch the photographer snap the picture, you notice that the family has members from three generations.

The traditional Chinese family is composed of three generations: an elderly couple (grandparents); adult sons, their wives, and unmarried daughters; and the children of the sons. Elder members are greatly respected in Chinese families because they carry the wisdom of the past.

Filial Piety You have encountered a boy assisting an elderly woman down a dirt path located in southern China. You are impressed with how the boy holds the woman’s arm so she doesn’t fall.

Filial piety- devotion to and respect for one’s elders- is the most important of all Chinese virtues. Children must obey, please, and support their parents when they are alive, and are expected to mourn and honor, or venerate them after their death. In Chinese society, filial piety extends beyond respect for one’s parents to respect for elders in general.

Weddings You are in the city of Shanghai on the east coast of China watching a young bride prepare for her wedding. You notice that she is surrounded by her family members and that one of them is adjusting her veil.

Until the mid 1900s, Chinese parents usually arranged their children’s marriages. Brides and grooms did not even meet until just before the wedding. Today, most Chinese choose their own spouses. However, parents still play an important part in bringing couples together. If the couple becomes engaged, parents may consult an astrologer to determine a favorable wedding date and time.

On the wedding day, the groom goes to the bride’s house, where the couple eats a farewell meal with the bride’s family. The couple then go to the groom’s house, where they are married. The bride traditionally wears a red dress and a red silk veil. After the wedding, the family holds a banquet.

Death and Mourning You are standing on a road in southern China, watching a funeral procession make its way towards you. Looking more closely at the mourners, you notice that some of the are walking slowly backward, away from the coffin.

Chinese families conduct elaborate ceremonies to honor their dead relatives. On the day of the funeral, the family dresses in white, the traditional color of mourning. Several men pull or carry the coffin in a long procession to the burial site. Sometimes the mourners walk backward in front of the coffin to show their grief.

Following the funeral, there is a mourning period that lasts seven weeks. At the end of this period, family members burn various items made of paper, including money, cars, clothes, and houses. They believe that the deceased might need these items in the next life. After the mourning period is over, families continue to hold regular ceremonies to honor their ancestors.

Traditionally, Chinese families have valued boys more highly than girls. This is partly due to the fact that girls left the family when they got married. Boys carry on the family name, add to the family’s wealth, and conduct ceremonies to honor the family’s ancestors.

We hope you enjoyed your trip!