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2 Self and communication

3 Who am I?

An exercise: “Who am I?” ■ Ask yourself this question. ■ Answer on a piece of paper. ■ Write as much as possible ■ Share with the class ( as much as possible) 4

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon

“Who am I?” ■ We are a complex person. ■ Difficult to answer accurately or completely. ■ Our life begins and we started to learn who we are, through our interactions with the people around us. ■ Most of us has a constant image of ourselves. ■ The image of ourselves also varies with different situation. 6

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon What is your self-concept? How has communication affected your self-concept? Who am I? Also how does your self-concept affect communication?

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon Understanding ourselves ■ Self-concept: perceived self, consists of an organized collection of beliefs and attitudes about self ■ Self-image: mental picture of self ■ Self-esteem: feelings and attitudes toward self

Understanding self-concept ■ Our self concept or self identity is our perceived self, which consists of an organised collection of beliefs and attitudes about self. ■ Who we perceive ourselves to be is determined by our experiences and communication with others. ■ This include the roles and values we have selected for ourselves, and how we believe others see us. 9

Understanding self concept ■ Self concept consists of 2 subcomponents, closely related: 1.Self image The mental picture of self 2. Self-esteem Our feelings and attitudes towards ourselves including our evaluation of ourselves 10

Our interactions ■ How others treat us affect how we view ourselves. ■ Also we can “hide” some parts of ourselves or features to prevent rejection. 11

Self-concept as a process ■ Communication is a dynamic process and so is our self-concept. ■ Self perception and the perception of others have of us differ from time to time, from situation to situation and from person to person 12

Self-concept is complex because…. ■ Self concept is affected by : –How we perceive ourselves –How we perceive others –How others perceive us –How we think others perceive ■ Influenced by our values, attitudes and beliefs etc {culture and gender} 13

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon Development of Self-Concept ■ Sensory awareness ■ Parental feedback ■ Others’ communication

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon Development of Self-Concept ■ Values – general, relatively long-lasting ideals that guide our behavior ■ Attitudes – evaluative dispositions, feelings about self, others, ideas, events ■ Beliefs – convictions or confidence in the truth of something

Kinch Model : Self-concept and Communication Perception of others’ responses(P) Self-concept (S) Behaviour (B) Actual responses of others (A) 16

Self-concept and communication ■ The perception we believe others have on us affect our communication. ■ Our view of ourselves influences how we communicate with others. ■ Communication and self concept are inseparable and both involve process. ■ Consider the personal-social identity continuum 17

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon What is the personal-social identity continuum? Individual Social

Intrapersonal communication ■ Communication with oneself is the basis of all other communication experiences. ■ We “create” our own “movie of life” ■ Thoughts and words are the tools of creation of our “movie of life”. ■ “Labels” about life comes from inside us. 19

Self-sabotage or self-fulfillment ■ “You are what you think”; thoughts are the seeds of actions. ■ The true sabotage lies within communication with oneself, in thoughts and in words ■ Intra personal communication is the communication you have with yourself about yourself and others. (Perkins, page 2-3) 20

Dive into your life: How clean is your lake ? 21 (Perkins, 2008, page 6 )

Self-fulfilling prophecy and impression management ■ Self-fulfilling prophecy: expectations that help to create the conditions that lead us to act in predictable ways ■ Impression management: creating a positive self-image in order to influence the perceptions of others 22 Copyright © Allyn and Bacon 2008

Impression Management ■ The way people perceive us strongly influence their behaviour toward us and thus influence communication. ■ The desire to “look good” to others at first meeting is very strong. ■ The creation of positive image of oneself to influence others is referred to as impression management ( self- presentation) ■ Facework ■ Facework: ways we act to maintain our own presenting image and the images of others 23

24 Understanding the self and others

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Culture, gender and self-concept ■ Does culture and gender influence our self-concept? 26

Copyright © Allyn and Bacon Culture and Self-Concept ■ Individualistic orientation ■ Individualistic orientation: tendency to stress personal goals and achievements over group goals and achievements ■ Collectivistic orientation ■ Collectivistic orientation: group goals over individual goals

28 Can we enhance self-concept?

References: ■ Seiler, W. J and Beall, M. L ( 2008). Communication. Making Connections ( 7 th ed). Boston: Pearson ■ Perkins,P. S ( 2008). The Art and Science of Communication. Tools for Effective Communication in the Work Place. New Jersey: Wiley. ■ Hybels, S., and Weaver II, R. L ( 2004). Communcating Effectively ( 7 th ed). Boston: Mc Graw Hill ■ Verdeber, R. F. and Verderber, K.S ( 2005).Communicate( 11 th ed). CA: Thomson/Wadsworth 29