7 Weeks to School Success Written by, Darren Tagliarini Behavior Specialist www.thebehaviorguy.com

SETTING A GOAL AND RESPONSIBILITY Week 1 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: SETTING A GOAL AND RESPONSIBILITY

Week 1 SET A GOAL This goal will start every lesson as you review what the child’s goal is and their progress on that goal Give one copy to child’s teacher to complete before session 1.Assist student with completing the same document during session 1 then discuss and create a goal to work on as you compare teacher/student perceptions (Doc 1)

what your teacher THINKS Let's see what your teacher THINKS Discuss teacher Perception Survey and assist student with creating a goal to work on. (10-15 minutes) SC

  1. Do you do your work at your desk without bothering others a. yes b. no c. sometimes 2. Do you remember to bring home the supplies that you need every day? 3. Is your desk neat and tidy or is it messy? a. neat b. messy C. sometimes neat RESPONSIBLE QUIZ 4. Do you sometimes forget things? a. yes b. no c. sometimes 5. Are you having your best year of school? 6. Will you be ready for the next grade? c. maybe Discuss as a group

Parents give points for each job your child completes this week. Send home for group homework Parents give points for each job your child completes this week.

Week 2 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: GOOD LISTENING SKILLS

What was your goal? How did you do? SEND ANOTHER Teacher Perception Survey and assist discuss progress with student FROM PREVIOUS WEEK. How did you do?

Ways to be a better listener ACTIVITY Ways to be a better listener Let’s read some ways that people can be better listeners. Some of the ideas are good, some are great and some are not so good. It is up to you to circle which are which! 1. Stop what you are doing and look at who is talking Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 2. Keep doing what you are doing but listen Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 3. Write down what the teacher is saying Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 4. After the directions were read….ask a friend what they are doing Good idea- Great idea- Not so good Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 5. Look at the teacher and raise a hand if you missed something 6. Walk to the teacher’s desk and ask a question while she is talking Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 7. Put your head down and listen Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 8. Read a book Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 9. Write down some notes Good idea- Great idea- Not so good 10. Stop what you are doing and look at the speaker Good idea- Great idea- Not so good

Week 3 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: SELF CONTROL

AND THEN MAKES THE BEST DECISION you CAN. What is self control? Self control is doing the right thing EVEN when the adults aren’t looking. STOPS THINKS AND THEN MAKES THE BEST DECISION you CAN. When you do the right thing you’ll feel proud and when makes a mistake he learns and tries not to make that same mistake twice. SC

ACTIVITY SC STOP AND THINK Here are some situations where a person could use their self control. Let’s find out what you think they should do Counselor and student can work together to fill in responses Here’s the situation What would you do? 1. A boy drops five dollars and can’t buy his lunch 2. The teacher leaves the room for several minutes and leaves no work to complete 3. Friends come over to play and ruin your toys 4. Your parents send you to bed early 5. You leave school and forget your books 6. Your teacher is absent and you have a substitute and she doesn’t know what to do 7. You lose a favorite toy and think someone stole it 8. You are told to stop playing to eat dinner but you want to finish your game 9. You are late for school and you run down the hall 10. You get a bad grade in school STOP AND THINK

Week 4 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: SHOWING RESPECT

What are some ways you show respect in school? How did you do? What is your goal? What are some ways you show respect in school? What are some ways you show respect at home?

RESPECTFUL OR NOT? Circle one A boy wants to play with a game, so he invites a friend to play but does not allow anyone else to join, even though several kids ask to play and the game is for several players. A girl in class has brought a toy to share and she let’s everyone take turns seeing it and playing with it There is a new student in class who has dirty pants on. Several of the kids laugh and make fun of him. The teacher asks a question of a boy in class and he gets it very wrong. Another boy leans over to him and says “Nice try” A girl in class has a nice new shirt on and one of the girls in class tells her she looks nice.

Week 5 EXPECTATIONS Handling Anger Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: Handling Anger

What is your goal? How are you doing? SEND ANOTHER Teacher Perception Survey and assist discuss progress with student FROM PREVIOUS WEEK. What is your goal? How are you doing?

What are the things that bug you? Complete and discuss.

I can talk calmly even when I am angry I have hurt people’s feelings when I have been angry Let's think of some things we could do differently

TOP 10 WAYS TO HANDLE ANGER TOP 10 WAYS TO HANDLE ANGER 10. Tell someone you are angry 9. Walk away 8. Yell, scream, punch or cry into a pillow 7. Draw or paint how you are feeling 6. Tear or crumple up papers and old magazines 5. Take time and think 4. Talk to yourself in the mirror about your problem 3. Listen to music 2. Think of the consequences of losing control 1. Accept things and move on

Do you think everyone gets angry? How do people handle anger? What are some ways that you handle your anger?

The ACE Plan The ACE Plan A Awareness: Choose to be aware of your body’s anger signs. They tell you when you are getting angry. Sweaty hands Cold feet Red face or ears Clenched fists Fast heart beat Mean, terrible thoughts

C Calm Down: As soon as you feel your warning signs use the calming strategies that you have learned. Sit and Breathe deeply Count to ten Walk away Accept it Laugh it off Stop and think of the consequences E Express yourself: Let someone know how you feel in a calm way. Talk it out, draw or write it out but be sure to let it out no need to scream and shout.

Week 6 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: Handling Conflict

What is your goal? How did you do?

We have a choice when we get angry…let’s play The Choices Game The Choices Game I will read a sentence to you and you tell me if it is a choice you can or can not make. 1. I will be taller tomorrow. I can’t chose 2. I like strawberry ice-cream better than vanilla. I can chose

3. I can play with a friend on Tuesday and not on Wednesday. I can chose 4. I like strawberry ice-cream better than vanilla. I can’t chose 5. I can take my books home from class. I can chose 6. I can leave the room and go home anytime during the day. I can’t chose 7. I can go the video store and pick a movie from the kids section. I can chose

8. I can work on my anger and control it.. I can chose 9. I can lose control and make bad choices. I can chose 10. I can be a better person and make the world a better place. I can chose

3. LISTEN . . . to the other person's ideas and feelings. HOW TO WORK OUT CONFLICTS (Fairly and Peacefully)   1. STOP . . . before you lose control of your temper and make the conflict worse.   2. SAY . . . what you feel is the problem. What is causing the disagreement? What do you want?   3. LISTEN . . . to the other person's ideas and feelings.   4. THINK . . . of solutions that will satisfy both of you. If you still can't agree, ask someone else to help you work it out.

Why is it important to settle conflicts peacefully Why is it important to settle conflicts peacefully? What can happen if you don't? Are there some conflicts that can't be resolved? Have you ever started working on a project with a friend and gotten into a disagreement? What caused the disagreement? How did you feel? What did you say or do? SC

Circle the words that describe what you try to do Circle the words that describe what you try to do. Put an "X" on the ones you try not to do. play fair throw trash out the window be polite do kind things for others hurt animals help your family tell lies call children bad names push ahead in line do what you say you will do be kind to pets make good choices fight pick up trash be rude be thoughtful be mean to others ignore adults talk when the teacher is talking share follow the rules give up when things are hard finish your work tease others X X X X X X X X X X X X Start at top left and move to right

Week 7 EXPECTATIONS Follow directions Listen to each other Do your best work THIS WEEKS TOPIC: Review and Close

REVIEW ALL TEACHER PERCEPTION SHEETS OVER PAST 6 WEEKS REVIEW AND DISCUSS ALL LESSONS

How did you do on your goal? We talked about responsibility in our first meeting. What does being responsible mean? We talked about being a good listener. How can you be a better listener? How can you show self control?In the following places Cafeteria Art Class Classroom At Home What is a good way to handle your anger? Does everyone get angry? What does the word conflict mean? Why are conflicts important and how do we solve them peacefully? What did you learn from our time together?

Remember these Ways to Keep a Positive Self Esteem Develop daily positive self statements List the things you are good at: Learn to identify your needs and feelings and express them to the appropriate individuals daily. Know the people you can go to for assistance Complete tasks and achieve goals Share your success and accept positive feedback Setting goals and completing them helps build our self esteem. Make a list of 5 goals that you would like to complete. Then select one goal to work on. Think of ideas and ways to complete that goal.

HANDOUTS