w w w. a m a b l e. i n Preparing children sexually

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Go around and hug everybody in this room.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n What is your response? Child playing with his genitals. Child playing with his genitals. Child looks at an bra ad and ask what is she wearing? Child looks at an bra ad and ask what is she wearing? When watching TV with Child – an intimate kissing scene comes up? When watching TV with Child – an intimate kissing scene comes up? Your child tells you today “one child removed his pants in the class and something was hanging out? Why it does not hang out from my body?” Your child tells you today “one child removed his pants in the class and something was hanging out? Why it does not hang out from my body?” Child asks – “What is Rape”? Child asks – “What is Rape”? Child does not ask such question Child does not ask such question

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Multiple Intelligences Beliefs Motivation Feelings Self Esteem Empower Creativity Habits of mind Behaviour

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Is this your response? Scold the child? Scold the child? Avoid answering? Avoid answering? Wish child had not asked? Wish child had not asked? Change channel / topic? Change channel / topic?

w w w. a m a b l e. i n So what do these responses do to the child? I am bad I am bad It ’ s wrong to discuss such things with YOU …………… Its eembarrassing It ’ s wrong to discuss such things with YOU …………… Its eembarrassing There is something SPECIAL about it There is something SPECIAL about it You don ’ t want to talk about it - so WHY to bother. Avoid/ Ignore You don ’ t want to talk about it - so WHY to bother. Avoid/ Ignore

w w w. a m a b l e. i n It has to begin with you……

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education is more about beliefs than actual information. Our Beliefs

w w w. a m a b l e. i n 1 Give the Vocabulary It is not ‘something’ – it has a name: “penis”, “vagina”

w w w. a m a b l e. i n 2 Functions of ALL body parts The function of Urination does not make Vagina or Penis DIRTY.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n 3 Awareness Public body parts v/s Private body parts Public body parts v/s Private body parts Public and Private (body) actions Public and Private (body) actions

w w w. a m a b l e. i n 4 Sensitize 4 Sensitize – Good touch, Bad touch – Sexual touch

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Let us begin………. Let us begin………. Body Education 1.Give right vocabulary 2. Correct function of body parts 3. Private and public body parts 4. Private and public actions 5. Sensitize – Good touch, bad touch

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Why Body Education ? Nothing is dirty or bad. ALL parts of their body are good. Nothing is dirty or bad. ALL parts of their body are good. It will help make it easier for them to come to you when they have questions. It will help make it easier for them to come to you when they have questions. You be the FIRST to give them information. Easy to talk about BODY when they grow. You be the FIRST to give them information. Easy to talk about BODY when they grow. Children need to feel good about themselves, whether they are boys or girls. Children need to feel good about themselves, whether they are boys or girls.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Break your own barrier “What you believe, what you feel and what you say, do, and ‘not do’ - will have an impact on your children's sexual life”

w w w. a m a b l e. i n So, lets see what we can do (role play) You find your child and his friend (both 7 years) are naked and playing with reach other’s body parts

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sexual Behavior - Pre Primary Sexual Behavior - Pre Primary Exploring private body parts. Exploring private body parts. Touch and play with them. Touch and play with them. Interest in the physical characteristics of the opposite sex. Interest in the physical characteristics of the opposite sex. Undressing with another preschooler and ‘playing doctor’ together. Undressing with another preschooler and ‘playing doctor’ together. Wondering where babies come from. Wondering where babies come from. Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and society

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sexual Behavior - Primary Modest and conscious Modest and conscious Kissing games and marriage pretend-play. Kissing games and marriage pretend-play. Babies come from? Babies come from? Sex play; ‘playing doctor’ Sex play; ‘playing doctor’ Curious about gender differences, sexual intercourse and pregnancy Curious about gender differences, sexual intercourse and pregnancy Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and society

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Puberty Physical Changes Girls Physical Changes Girls Physical changes – Boys Physical changes – Boys Also ……….. –Emotional changes –Your thinking will change –Your relationship with your parents

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex Education - Socio - Emotional Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” Boy friends and Girl friends Boy friends and Girl friends Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes. Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes. Media stereotypes Media stereotypes

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education – Social Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs Fatigue Syndrome, Depression, Fatigue Syndrome, Depression, Violent media, Pornography Violent media, Pornography Responsible sexual behaviour Responsible sexual behaviour Media stereotypes Media stereotypes

w w w. a m a b l e. i n If you are late………. Start NOW – Talk about the BODY education and then move to …………

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Benefits You be the FIRST to inform You be the FIRST to inform You are approachable You are approachable Your family values Your family values Healthy relationship Healthy relationship

w w w. a m a b l e. i n So, lets see what we can do (role play)

w w w. a m a b l e. i n So, lets see what we can do (role play) You child comes and tells you that a adult relative of yours has been fondling with his/her genitals

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sexual Abuse 1. Listen – completely without any judgement 2. Empathize with child’s emotions 3. If required express your emotions (only emotions) 4. Assure its not child’s mistake 5. State that whatever maybe you are with the child 6. Ask child for opinions and options 7. Establish that saying NO to anybody is FINE 8. Discuss more options 9. Reiterate you are always THERE

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Guidelines   Check your own beliefs   Make it a regular topic   Mark it important   Be open & relaxed when talking about sex   If not, tell that child that you’re not comfortable   Don’t react - Understand the ACTION   Do not give wrong or fanciful information   Educate yourself Use books, articles or videos, youth websites that can help. You could suggest someone you both trust as a good person for your son or daughter to talk with. Use books, articles or videos, youth websites that can help. You could suggest someone you both trust as a good person for your son or daughter to talk with. A hysterical response will probably guarantee your child may never risk asking you anything about sex again A hysterical response will probably guarantee your child may never risk asking you anything about sex again

w w w. a m a b l e. i n TOOLS Role plays Role plays Puppets Puppets Casual Discussions Casual Discussions Books Books Draw pictures Draw pictures Yoga – Body Awareness Yoga – Body Awareness

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Jagriti Remember sex is a natural and biological motivation Check your own beliefs Empathise with child feelings. Express yours Remember your response will determine how the child will think about himself or herself Empower the child to face sexual situations Child is creative enough to create own understanding; Be creative in how you show your points / concerns Awareness then understanding. Strategies they can create themselves Use Multiple ways to reach to the child - draw, role play, discuss, songs, give data about abuse, Sex is natural behaviour and in most cases the intention is to enjoy oneself Prepare the child mentally, emotionally, socially and sexually. Learn from life for life.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n

Complete Sex education

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Myths - Sex Education There is an age There is an age Responsibility of school. Responsibility of school. They will undesrtand as they grow They will undesrtand as they grow Sex eductaion – only means menstruation (girls), penis, hair growth (boys) and biology of sex. Sex eductaion – only means menstruation (girls), penis, hair growth (boys) and biology of sex. Touching genitals is not normal – harmful for growth. It distracts from studies. Touching genitals is not normal – harmful for growth. It distracts from studies. Talk about sex issues - kids will become sexually active. Talk about sex issues - kids will become sexually active. Its okay to say “God put baby in mummy’s tummy” – kids will not understand the facts. Its okay to say “God put baby in mummy’s tummy” – kids will not understand the facts.  Only mothers should talk to girls and fathers talk to son.  Boys do not need to know about periods and Girls do not need to know about wet dreams.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n New Perspectives  No age - Talking with your children about their bodies is easier if you start when they are very young.  Not only school - Home plays a major role  Sex education is as important as maths or engilish or sports  Not only biology - Complete education to all the genders.  Sex play – normal. It can be soothing.  Talking early about sex - will help make it easier for them to come to you when they have questions.  They will understand - You give factual and age appropriate information.  Both parenst talk – bonds the family  Well informed kids behave sexually responsibly.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education - 1 Body education Body education Awareness - Good touch, bad touch, sexual touch Awareness - Good touch, bad touch, sexual touch Awareness of Abuse – physical, emotional and sexual Awareness of Abuse – physical, emotional and sexual Empower at home Empower at home Sexual behaviour of pre-primary and primary children. Sexual behaviour of pre-primary and primary children.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education – 2 Puberty Changes – hormones, feelings, body appearance Puberty Changes – hormones, feelings, body appearance Changes with teenage – like Acne, hair growth, skin change Changes with teenage – like Acne, hair growth, skin change Do boys have Breast? Do boys have Breast? Breast and size Breast and size

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education - 3 Boy friends and Girl friends Boy friends and Girl friends Menstruation – When do periods starts and stops, Accidents like blood stains, Exercise and periods, Mood swings, Cramps, Pimples and periods, Light and heavy periods. Menstruation – When do periods starts and stops, Accidents like blood stains, Exercise and periods, Mood swings, Cramps, Pimples and periods, Light and heavy periods. Wet dreams, Erections, Hair and skin Wet dreams, Erections, Hair and skin Hair growth – shaving, waxing, Hair growth – shaving, waxing, Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education - 4 Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” Reproduction, Pregnancy Reproduction, Pregnancy Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. Condoms, birth control, contraception, unplanned pregnancy, Abortion Condoms, birth control, contraception, unplanned pregnancy, Abortion Sex diseases and STD (sexually transmitted diseases), Infections like Urine infection Sex diseases and STD (sexually transmitted diseases), Infections like Urine infection

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Sex education – 5 Sex education – 5 Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs Fatique Syndrome, Depression, Fatique Syndrome, Depression, Violent media, Pronography Violent media, Pronography Responsible sexual behaviour Responsible sexual behaviour

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Skills develop Being able to communicate, Being able to communicate, Be aware Be aware Decision-making Decision-making Seek help from adults - including parents, carers and professionals. Seek help from adults - including parents, carers and professionals. Be able to differentiate between accurate and inaccurate information, Be able to differentiate between accurate and inaccurate information, Discuss a range of moral and social issues and perspectives on sex and sexuality, including different cultural attitudes and sensitive issues like sexuality, abortion and contraception. Discuss a range of moral and social issues and perspectives on sex and sexuality, including different cultural attitudes and sensitive issues like sexuality, abortion and contraception.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n HOW ?

w w w. a m a b l e. i n How to answer? Think honestly what you think about the questions Think honestly what you think about the questions Check your beliefs Check your beliefs Express your thought Express your thought Give appropriate and factual information Give appropriate and factual information Ask and respect child’s opinion Ask and respect child’s opinion “Children need most of all to feel loved and lovable”

w w w. a m a b l e. i n FACTS: It is Natural and Normal It is Natural and Normal Does not mean the same as it does for adults. Does not mean the same as it does for adults. If you stop – they hide If you stop – they hide Playing Doctor - You see your young child undressing and playing doctor with another friend at home. Playing Doctor - You see your young child undressing and playing doctor with another friend at home.

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Playing Doctor - YOUR ACTION: Playing Doctor - YOUR ACTION: 1. Do not act in horror or scream or punish. 2. Remind them about My body – other cannot touch – only you can touch My body – other cannot touch – only you can touch Private and public body parts Private and public body parts Private and public actions Private and public actions Give them options – put your clothes and play same game (if they are playing family, doctor) or any other game Give them options – put your clothes and play same game (if they are playing family, doctor) or any other game If books are handy – read one for them If books are handy – read one for them Take it easy - remind yourself it is natural Take it easy - remind yourself it is natural

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Your young child likes to touch your private body parts. Facts: Exploration, Curious, Not a sexual act Your action – Role play –My body – your body –My feelings –Give option

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Two friends taking bath together or sleep in the night FACTS: Enjoyment Your Action –Prepare them –Awareness of My Body –Empower to say NO –Ask their opinion

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Your child playing and rubbing genitals in the night and enjoying. Facts: Natural, Soothing Your Action –Accept –Private and Public action –My Body

w w w. a m a b l e. i n How does baby come in Mummy’s Tummy ? Avoid fanciful explanations Avoid fanciful explanations Keep your answers simple. Keep your answers simple. 1. Baby grows in mummy’s tummy’. 2. Created from a sperm from their Dad and an egg from their Mum. Grow in mummy’s organ called Utreus. 3. Sperm comes from Dad's penis and the egg from Mum's ovaries. Your own pregnancy, the pregnancy of a friend or even pets giving birth. Your own pregnancy, the pregnancy of a friend or even pets giving birth. Your Family Values Your Family Values

w w w. a m a b l e. i n Your young child likes to touch your private body parts. Facts: Exploration, Curious, Not a sexual act Your action – Role play –My body – your body –My feelings –Give option

w w w. a m a b l e. i n THANK YOU Reach us – H andouts I can only show you the way, cannot make a way for you. I can only show you the way, cannot make a way for you. Do support our endeavour to spread awareness about sex education by helping us conduct these kinds of workshops in more schools, apartment complexes and companies. Do support our endeavour to spread awareness about sex education by helping us conduct these kinds of workshops in more schools, apartment complexes and companies.