Conflict Resolution Sec 3 PCME

Objectives:  know your dominant conflict resolution style  state the 5 conflict resolution styles  know that different conflict resolution styles are required for different situations

Trigger Video

Trigger Quote  I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. — Barack Obama, Acceptance Speech  He who blames others has a long way to go on his journey. He who blames himself is halfway there. He who blames no one has arrived. — Chinese proverb  In the midst of conflict, there is absolutely nothing that produces gains as dramatically as listening. — Dr. Neil Warren

CONFLICT IS INEVITABLE 1.Define conflict 2.Discuss to what extent is the above statement true.

Conflict is normal!  Conflict is a normal part of our lives.  Conflict is not a competition.  It is how you manage a conflict that is important! Change the way you look a things and the things you look at change. — Wayne Dyer

Activity 1: How I act in conflicts  Work on Activity Sheet 1. Indicate how typical each proverb is, of your actions, in a conflict according to the numbering system  Fill in the scoring table and determine which is your dominant style. Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. — Ambrose Bierce

10mins for Activity 1 Every form of blame, criticism and judgment is just a tragic expression of an unmet need. — Marshall Rosenberg, Non Violent Communication

Your say…  What are the causes of conflict? Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In those choices lie our growth and our happiness. — Stephen Covey, The 8th Habit

Causes of ‘Conflict’  Differences  Disagreements  Quarrels  Involves personal bias and emotions  ‘Conflict of Interest’  ‘Conflicting Goals’  Relationships

Styles of conflict

Your Dominant Conflict Resolution Style  Avoiding (Withdrawing)  Competing (Forcing)  Accommodating (Smoothing)  Compromising  Collaborating

Smoothing  “You don’t have a dog in this fight”  Cool down needed  No chance for success  Turn the other cheek

 Advantages  The issue is not important to you but is important to the other person.  You feel good about the sacrifice you are making.  This might be a way to build trust with this person.  Disadvantages  Missed opportunity to clarify issue  Increases power differential  Coward/pushover label  Overused in healthcare Smoothing

Forcing  True zero sum game  Time constraints  “Opponent's” only style

Forcing  Advantages  It might be effective in select situations with difficult-to-deal-with competitive- type people.Increases power differential  The conflict may get resolved quickly and cheaply.  Disadvantages  Sets power wins pattern  Increases power differential  Not helpful in personal relationships  No ownership in the solution

Withdrawing  Issue more important to the other party  Graceful exit strategy  Value the relationship  Competition getting no where

Withdrawing  Advantages  The issue is not important  It often works with short-term problems.  Can be used if the cost of the solution is more than I am willing to pay.  The process of gathering information is still on going.  Disadvantages  You are a fixer/enabler  Doormat  Increase power differential

Compromising  Issue and relationship important  Need temporary or expedient “fix”  Collaboration falters

Compromising  Advantages  This might be used when time is short.  A stalemate would cause more harm than the compromise  Disadvantages  This might be used when time is short.  Focus on position/solution not issues  Lose-lose rather than win-win  May miss a systems solution

Confronting  Need to build support for implementation  Addressing complex problems  Change needed for the solution  Allows focus on goals, issues, values not positions or demands

Confronting  Advantages  Increases probability of goal achievement.  Increases trust and builds relationships.  Produces greatest sense of ownership of solutions.  Sets a good example for others to follow  Disadvantages  Time consuming  Both parties need to listen and learn  Willingness to change  Needs planning and team building

Conflict-Management Styles  In every situation we are responsible for our actions.  Conflict situations offer us an opportunity to choose a style for responding to the conflict.  The key to effective conflict management is to choose the conflict-management style that is appropriate for the conflict.  Most of us have a favorite style that we use in conflict situations, but we are all capable of choosing a different style when it is appropriate

Styles of Conflict Successful leaders know their own preferred style of handling conflict, but vary their style to meet the needs of the situation.. You can't shake hands with a fist. — Indira Ghandi

Conflict resolution is one of the five key skills of emotional intelligence  The ability to resolve conflicts positively and with confidence is the fifth of five essential emotional intelligence skills. The skill of conflict resolution may help you build strong relationships, overcome challenges, and succeed at work and in life.

Conflict Resolution Styles  There is no one style that is superior over another.  We tend to use our dominant style to resolve conflicts. This style may not be suitable in some situations. There are no problems we cannot solve together, and very few we can solve by ourselves. — Lyndon Johnson

Successful Conflict Management  Reconsider your definitions of conflict  Know your preferred style  Vary your style based on situation  Tailor your approach based on involved parties  Proactively manage conflict – anticipate  Communication – LISTEN The quieter you became the more you can hear. — Baba Ram Das