Communication and Identity: Creating and Presenting the Self Chapter Summary Communication and the Self-Concept Biological and Social Roots of the Self Characteristics of the Self-Concept Influences on Identity Presenting the Self Public and Private Characteristics of Identity Management Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Who are you? Write several aspects of who you think you are? What do you view as what is most important? Describe it as “roles” if you are having a hard time thinking of many. You will now complete (individually) the Invitation to Insight on Page 47 in your text.

Communication and the Self-Concept A relatively stable set of perceptions you hold about yourself Not only your physical self but your emotional states, talents, likes, dislikes, values roles, etc. May also be described as whole communities collectively develop an image of themselves – Football Games, Weddings Self-esteem Part of your self-concept Involves evaluation of self worth Described on how you feel about your qualities – “I am glad I am quiet” or “I am embarrassed about being quiet” It all comes down to confidence!! It all comes down to high self-esteem or low self-esteem. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Self-Esteem People with high self-esteem are more willing to communicate than people with low-self-esteem.

Communication and the Self-Concept People who feel good about themselves will have positive expectations about how they communicate. FIGURE 2.1 The Relationship between Self-Esteem and Communication Behavior Page 43 Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Biology and the Self Personality You are not born with a self-concept You do not have words to describe who you are! Your parents/caretakers shape who you are. Children Learn What They Live – Pg 50 Tends to be stable throughout your life To a large degree is part of our genetic makeup Biology accounts for: extroversion, shyness, assertiveness, verbal aggression and willingness to communicate. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Socialization and the Self-Concept Reflected Appraisal Each of us develops a self-concept that reflects the way we believe others see us. Positive and negative evaluations become the mirror by which we know ourselves. Anyone whose opinion you value can leave an imprint. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Reflected Appraisal We are likely to feel less valuable, lovable, and capable, to the degree that others have communicated ego busting signals; and will probably feel good about ourselves to the degree that others seem to feel good about us. Our Self-Concept List - is a product of the positive and negative messages you have received throughout your life. As a child your first communication is ego boosting…this shapes your self-concept – and lays the foundation of who you will be for the rest of your lives. Both Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication. Are you affectionate/lovable in tone of voice or are you businesslike? Does your tone express love and enjoyment or disappointment and irritation?

Communication and the Self-Concept Reflected Appraisal All of the previous information shapes a child’s sense of being “Ok” or “Not OK.” Children are VERY “trusting souls” – They have no other was of viewing themselves – they only know and accept at face value – what others tell or show them – POSITIVE or negative! “Cipher in the Snow” Pg. 54-55 How do you arrive at your opinion of yourself as: a students/as a person attractive to others/as a competent worker?? During childhood and adolescence all of these views are powerful and shape who you are! Whether you believe so or not!! The influence of significant others becomes less powerful as people grow older. As people approach 30 their self-concept doesn’t usually change radically without psychotherapy.

Communication and the Self-Concept Socialization and the Self-Concept Social Comparison Evaluating ourselves in terms of how we compare to others We decide if we are Superior or Inferior “Attractive or Ugly,” “Success or Failure,” “Intelligent or Stupid” These comparisons positively or negatively affect our self-concept. Social comparison can be dangerous. Reference groups play an important role. i.e. Hollywood Star, Donald Trump, Professional Athlete or Artist?? Is it an appropriate comparison? It depends on who we compare ourselves to…. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Many people judge themselves against unreasonable standards and suffer (internally) accordingly! Distorted self-images can lead to serious behavioral disorders such as depression, anorexia, bulimia, etc. Social comparisons provide a way to decide if we are the same or different from others. Child who likes ballet – Pg. 52

Communication and the Self-Concept Reference Groups Argue – tall/short, speak with an accent, have acne, etc. But it is the significance we attach to them that depends greatly on the opinions of others!! If you have held a poor self-image in the past it is not a reason for continuing to do so in the future. YOU CAN CHANGE your attitudes and behavior!! Commit to make one positive change TODAY!

Communication and the Self-Concept Characteristics of the Self-Concept The self-concept can be subjective. A distorted self-evaluation occurs for several reasons: Obsolete Information – Past failures don’t mean future failure, it applies to success also! Distorted Feedback – Negative self-image could be caused by overly critical parents/cruel friends/classmates/uncaring teachers or even memorable strangers! Too Positive Example! Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

A distorted self-evaluation occurs for several reasons: (Cont.) Self-Verification – the tendency to look for people who confirm our self-concept Emphasis on Perfection – Another cause for a strongly negative self-concept is the emphasis on perfection which is extremely common in our society. It is not wrong to aim at perfection as an ideal. I am merely suggesting only that achieving this state of perfection is usually not possible, and to expect that you should do so is a sure ticket to an inaccurate and unnecessarily low self-esteem. Pg. 58 Table 2-1 Social Expectations – “Perfectionist Society” After a while we begin to believe the types of statements we repeatedly make. It’s alright to proclaim that you’re miserable if you have failed to do well on a project; but it’s considered boastful to express your pride at a job well done. Self-esteem may be based on inaccurate thinking!! Do you agree?

Communication and the Self-Concept Characteristics of the Self-Concept Cognitive Conservatism The tendency to seek and attend information that conforms with an existing self-concept. The self-concept is resistant to change. Inaccurate self-concepts can lead to self-delusion and lack of growth. Inaccuracies are hard to maintain and lead to defensiveness. Communicators are reluctant to downgrade a favorable image. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Culture, Gender and Identity Culture Individualistic vs. Collectivistic Self-concept is influenced by culture. Different culturally influenced self-concepts can clash. In collective societies, there tends to be a higher degree of communication. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Culture, Gender and Identity Sex and gender Being male or female shapes the way people communicate with you. Pronouns with gender Boys - focus is on size, strength and activity Girls - focus is on beauty and sweetness What happens when they switch? Self-esteem is influenced by gender. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept The Self-fulfilling Prophecy The self-fulfilling prophecy occurs when a person’s expectation of an event, and their subsequent behavior based on those expectations, make the event more likely to occur. The Four Stages Holding an expectation Behaving in accordance with that expectation The expectation coming to pass Reinforcing the original expectation Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Types of Self-fulfilling Prophecies Self-imposed prophecies Your own expectations influence your behavior. Thinking that you will fail “I’m going to screw this up.” or “It’s not going to work.” Prophecies imposed by others Others’ expectations influence your behavior. All opinions you value can cause this prophecy. Pygmalion in the Classroom Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and the Self-Concept Changing your Self-concept Have a realistic perception of yourself. Have realistic expectations. Have the will to change. Have the skill to change. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management Public and Private Selves Identity Management Each of us has a multitude of identities. Perceived Self (private self) A reflection of the self-concept Presenting Self (public self) The way we want others to view us Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management Characteristics of Identity Management We strive to create multiple identities: “Helping friend,” “joking office mate,” “loving child” Identity Management Can be deliberate or unconscious Is collaborative Varies by situation People differ in their degree of identity management. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management Why we Manage Identities To start and manage relationships You may appear charming or confident even if you’re not. To gain compliance of others How do you dress when you go to work or to traffic court? To save other’s face You mask your discomfort to save another’s feelings. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management How do we Manage Identities Face-to-face impression management Manner consists of words and non-verbal actions. Doctors will change their impression management depending on which part of the examination they may be doing. Appearance shapes impression: Clothing, Tattoos, Jewelry, etc. Setting also influences how others may view us. Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management Computer-Mediated Communication (CMC) Slight limitations over other communication channels More control over managing your identity CMC also gives individuals the ability to broadcast their identity in a way traditional communication can’t: MySpace, FaceBook and Friendster Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication as Identity Management Identity Management and Honesty Some manage identity dishonestly: Misrepresenting yourself to date Job applicants who lie about academic records Salespeople who pretend to be dedicated to customer service Managing identity does not make you a liar. Although seemingly manipulative, it is authentic communication. Can you imagine not managing your identities? Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition

Communication and Identity: Creating and Presenting the Self Chapter Summary Communication and the Self-Concept Biological and Social Roots of the Self Characteristics of the Self-Concept Influences on Identity Presenting the Self Public and Private Characteristics of Identity Management Looking Out, Looking In 12th Edition