Do we have time for each other? LLC Home and Family Workshop Keith Waaraniemi Stony Lake Camp October 19–21, 2012

 Christ’s dual commandment of love guides us: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself”(Matt. 22:37-39). Loving is taking time for each other

 The home is where family members spend time together, sharing both joys and sorrows.  Creating a secure atmosphere in the home and teaching Christian values requires time together.  SING SHZ 420:1 Values of the Home

Like boughs that bear abundance / when firmly on the tree, / as people we’re created / to with each other be. / We thank You for our fam’lies, / the life that You established, / Your gifts to us, O Lord. Song 420:1

 Responsibility for the well-being of the home and common activities belongs to each family member.  When there is love and warmth in the home, matters and responsibilities are shared.  “Now the end of the commandment is charity out of a pure heart, and of a good conscience, and of faith unfeigned”(Tim. 1:5). Sharing the load

What requires the most gives the most  Establishing a family requires commitment:  Managing our time  Responsibility  Everyday life is strenuous and full.  Rewarding and fulfilling  What requires the most also gives the most.  SING SHZ 420:2

We need each other, Father, / an open, warm embrace, / the parents’ life experience, / the children’s trusting gaze. / We meet with disappointments, / surprises, and enjoyment, / here trav’ling side by side. Song 420:2

What requires the most gives the most  Amid our own imperfections the gospel is our strength in the home.  We need to feel the support of fellow travelers.  Every generation receives strength from the Creator to follow His perfect plan!

Time Management Choices  We have too little time for each other.  Today’s world emphasizes selfishness, materialism, entertainment.  Individual hobbies and recreation can take away from family time.

Time Management Choices  Everyday pressures can cause us to be physically, but not mentally present. “Here, but not here.”  Children not looking for “quality time,” but adult presence in everyday life.  Make time management choices for the family’s well- being.

Reasonable Responsibility  Ever-increasing demands on time.  Coordinating life and work a challenge.  Reasonable responsibility – that which we can reasonably do is enough.  Consider one’s ability to fulfill both work and home commitments.  Becoming overwhelmed, depressed, and burnt out can be the result of trying to do more than possible.

Balance in kingdom work and activities  Work forms and activities in Christianity:  What is truly necessary and essential?  Is our commitment as participants and workers diminishing?  Responsibility for the work on the shoulders of a few.  Gifts and resources of all are needed.  “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching” (Heb. 10:25).

Difficulties in Homes and Families  Adversities belong to everyday life:  Weariness  Lack of focus  Illness  Unemployment  Financial trials  Adversities and trials in the home are faced in a manner that engenders peace and security.  Our goal is to nurture the home’s well-being.

 Materialism in society can also affect and burden believers.  Goal can be to have everything at once.  Focus on material things can cloud faith.  Temptation to compare  God's Word guides toward a moderate way of life.  Temporal struggles do not mean that God’s blessing is missing.  We can each ask God for a content mind. Work and Careers

Pressure from society, friends, and relatives  Life’s difficulties and the pressure from society and other believers to conform can lead to putting on a false front.  “We can manage.” “Things are fine.”  This can lead us to not seek help from other believers and agencies in society that assist families.

Relationships in the home require time together  Spousal relationship needs caretaking.  Personal time.  Time for each other as a couple.  Nurturing the spousal relationship is caring for the family.

Lack of time together can cause growing apart  Does my spouse have time for my thoughts?  Do I have time for my spouse’s thoughts?  Am I being heard as an individual?  Is my spouse being heard as an individual?  Is everything else more important than time for the marriage and family?  Are we drifting apart?  SING SHZ 420:3

With selfishness and hurry, / how blinded we become. / We scarcely even notice / our dear ones’ needs at home. / But then we pray, dear Father, / and share our stress and burden / within the care of Christ. Song 420:3

 Friends are also important.  Excessive social interaction outside of the family can negatively effect family relationships.  An overuse of social media may cause difficulties in time management, as well as trivializing personal relationships. Social Relationships In our time, connections to relatives and dear ones can weaken. We must work to maintain them.

 Services are the central activity of Christianity.  In the hearing of God's Word, personal faith is strengthened and refreshed.  Take time as a family for Services, Bible class, Sunday school, camps, discussions, and visiting each other. Take time to hear God's Word

 Above all, living faith keeps hope and the future in our sights.  In the midst of all stages of life we can have childlike trust that God will help.  The Old Testament prophet expressed the thoughts of the Lord toward His own - thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give them a future and hope. (Jer. 29:11)  SING SHZ 420:4 The Goal is Heaven

Stay with us, dear Lord Jesus, / stay close in every phase, / when we let go and part here, / face deepest sorrow’s days. / For You alone can carry / and let us grow securely / beneath Your beams of grace. Song 420:4

 Why do we have too little time for each other?  How can we lighten the load of our dear ones?  What does it mean in practice to make time management choices for the well-being of the family?  What does it mean when we say “that which we can reasonably do is enough?  How do we with the right heart view our time for the activities and work of the kingdom vs. home time?  What does moderation mean regarding material goods?  Are we too proud to ask for help? Discussion Questions