Mentoring Emerging Leaders In Labor Organizations Communications Workers of America Next Generation

Mentoring Mentoring is being real, being a catalyst, and sometimes a prophet. “Mentoring is a unique relationship that has a magical quality that leads a mentor and a protégé through an experience of shared discovery.” Carlos Casteneda- The Teachings of Don Juan. 1968

There are key differences between instructing, coaching, and mentoring. Instructing deals largely with the dissemination of knowledge.knowledge Coaching deals primarily with skill building, and giving feedback for specific improvement.skill Mentoring is an activity that can potentially promote spiritual and passion development. A mentor is one who helps shape the outlook or attitude of the individual.spiritual attitude

What do emerging leaders look for? Someone they can look to as a role model; Someone who will teach them and share experiences with them; Someone who cares about them and will answer some of their most perpelxing questions; Someone who will push them and demand more of them than they will demand of themselves; Someone who believes they are capable of achieving the impossible and is willing to help them do it; Someone who will provide them with unique opportunties to prove themselves; Someone who will introduce them to others; Someone who will value their opinion and ideas, seek their input, and learn from them.

Mentoring is helping to focus a vision of freedom and possibility.

The art of mentoring: Passing along wisdom Mentoring is Mentoring is someone who shares wisdom and experiences with you without expectations. Mentoring isn’t Mentoring isn’t someone who tells you right from wrong and what you need to do.

SAGE Sage; n. a profoundly wise person, venerated for their experience. adj. wise, judicious or prudent. n. an herb used in medicine and known for its healing powers.

SAGE Surrendering Accepting Gifting Extending

Traps to Avoid I can help I know best I can help you get ahead You need me

The context of mentoring; “lead” is a four letter word Mentors responsibilities To empower the mentee with the knowledge that allows them to make confident choices To help the mentee grow as a person through learning from one another Role of Mentor for the future Be supportive, trustful, honest, accepting, and an affective listener Be a model of the mentee values Be able to look at the positive in all situations Be available ongoing

“In times of massive change, the novice learners inherit the earth, while the learned leaders remain beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.” –Eric Hoffer

Leveling the learning field Philosophy of mentor-mentee The philosophy of balancing the mentor- mentee relationship is to go into the relationship as a partner and to ensure that there will be mutual learning. Changing roles through attitude and communication The attitude has to be give and take – both parties have something to give and gain.

The power of rapport Communication/Dialogue Being able to communicate your awareness to your mentee about the consequences of the choices and actions they may take, without judgment or expectations is key to dialogue When we first connect with the mentee we set a foundation for trust and respect to be built throughout the relationship. Understanding Understand yourself- an awareness of your beliefs Understand others- an appreciation of others realities

Creating Trust Through Effective Communication Trust (a history of keeping my word) Credibility (dependability) Follow-through (keeping my word) Commitment (what will I do) Straight Talk (what’s my opinion)

Dialogue Dialogue is a form of communication that fosters trust, respect, authenticity, and shared meaning Exploring Assumptions Learn from and teach each other Curiosity

Advice versus feedback Danger of advice Avoid giving your opinion like it is the only way things can be seen Feedback as a communication tool Providing your view of situation that will not be seen as judgment and not lead to resistance –Make sure you agree on the situation –Ask permission to give your perspective –Cleary state your view of the situation –State your view in the first person singular.

Art of asking Questions Advocacy vs. Inquiry Advocacy Describing your situation, the insights you had, the assumptions you made about the situation or person and the conclusion you reached is the most powerful use of advocacy. Be open to questions. Inquiry Using questions is the key tool in helping each other see the links to our reasoning and open ourselves to alternative interpretations and conclusions.

Assumptions that destroy relationships How We Interpret Experience

Putting “us” in trust Power reducing techniques Mentor is seen as an equal to mentee. Mentee’s opinion is just as important as mentor’s. Relationship is not based on power but sharing of knowledge. Narrow emotional distance between mentor and mentee To be effective leaders it is important for the mentor and mentee to be adept in appreciating, understanding and analyzing the union focus (CWA Triangle) in the context of human beings

The lost art of listening An expert listener has the ability of understanding-what another says, means, thinks, and feels. An expert listener is valued and trusted. The expert listener has the power of influence. When people feel you care enough to listen and that you really understand them, they will be influenced by your listening not your words or action.

The lost art of listening WHY WE DON'T LISTEN Most people speak at about 125 to 140 words per minute. The ear is able to listen to 400 words per minute or more with a little training. The brain, that magnificent computer, is able to process information at a rate of 1,000 to 1,400 words per minute. So, the brain is able to tune in for a fraction of a second and process the words the speaker said and then take a break. Most people only actively listen for about 17 seconds at a time.

The lost art of listening The amount of training that we received in communication skills is inversely related to how much we use them. In our schooling we have received the most training in writing; we write only 9% percent of the time that we are communicating. The second greatest amount of training is in reading, and we use that only 16% of the time. We receive even less training for speaking than for reading, yet use speaking 30% of the time. Very few are trained to listen, and yet we use it 45% of the time we are communicating.

When fear and learning collide Overcoming anxiety of differences –keep an open mind, as you may not see things in the same light as your mentee. Defining “my” authenticity –Everyone has to be free to be him or herself The goal of building a union that welcomes and develops younger leadership for the union, should be the primary outlet for their creative energy.

The gift of balance Find the teachable moment Support without rescuing Avoid perfection Be passionate

Conclusion “The first problem for all of us, men and women, is not to learn, but to unlearn.” --Gloria Steinem opeiu3, afl-cio