Welcome to Dulles SHRM Emotional Intelligence for Leadership Effectiveness Linda J. Ferguson, Ph.D. http://www.linkedin.com/in/lindajferguson Feb. 15, 2012

Learning objectives A working knowledge of Emotional Intelligence and why it is important for personal and professional success. An understanding of the five competencies related to Emotional Intelligence An understanding of how to apply Emotional Intelligence to Leadership regarding decision making and leading teams

Leadership Effectiveness What came from your table discussion? “Each relationship you have with another person reflects the relationship you have with yourself” Alice DeVille How does this apply to Leadership? 5 mins of sharing from tables

Emotional Intelligence “We are being judged by a new yardstick; not just how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also how well we handle ourselves and each other.” Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Working with Emotional Intelligence, 1998 Meyer and Salovey did research at Princeton while Goleman was doing research at Harvard. Goleman was the one to popularize this research and bring it to the attention of the business world. CRM

Goleman’s Research Why do people with high IQ sometimes flounder while those with modest IQ do surprisingly well? Emotional Intelligence provides a foundation for emotional competencies that is a solid predictor of job performance and workplace success. Emotional Intelligence provides a foundation for emotional competencies that are a sound predictor of job performance and workplace success. Cognitive and non-cognitive abilities are related. Marshmallow studies (Stanford University) - 4-year olds were asked to stay in a room alone with a marshmallow and wait for a researcher to return. They were told that if they could wait until the researcher came back before eating the marshmallow, they could have two. 10 years later, researchers found that the kids who were able to resist temptation had a total SAT score 210 points higher than those who had been unable to wait. While understanding how people share ideas adds to the knowledge of group dynamics, it does not give a complete picture. One also needs to take into account the sharing of emotions, or emotional contagion, that occurs in groups. Barsade, Sigal G., "The Ripple Effect: Emotional Contagion In Groups" (October 2000) Some emotions translate into action and others into inaction. People benefit from a general understanding of the effect of emotions on their abilities to function. ‘Learned optimism’ – optimists tend to make specific, temporary, external causal attributions while pessimists tend to make global, permanent, internal attributions. Optimists out-perform pessimists (better at handling stress).

What is Emotional Intelligence? Emotional intelligence is not about being nice all the time. It is about being honest. Emotional intelligence is not about being “touchy-feely.” It is about being aware of your feelings, and those of others. There is a lot of brain behavior research on the connection between being rational and being emotional. Those two areas of the brain are directly connected. Emotional intelligence is not about being emotional. It is about being smart with your emotions. Strong link in brain between reasoning and emotions

Emotional Intelligence Personal Benefits of Emotional Intelligence Greater career success Stronger personal relationships Increased optimism and confidence Positive Psychology Better health Whole body of research in Positive Psychology ala Martin Seligman and the Emotional Intelligence research CRM

Personal Emotional Skills: First three E.Q. Competencies: Self Awareness Self Regulation- Managing Your Own Emotions Self Motivation “When our center is strong everything else is secondary, even the risks” Ellie Wiesel, Nobel Peace Prize winner

Professional Benefits of Emotional Intelligence Effective leadership skills Improved communication Less workplace conflict Better problem solving skills Increased likelihood of promotion CRM

E.I. Social Competence Other Oriented Emotional Skills: Empathy - Recognizing and Understanding Other’s Feelings Influence Others Commitment from others Awareness of Emotional Feedback from Others – Social Cues

The Five Essential Competencies of Emotional Intelligence Self-Awareness Self-Regulation Self-Motivation Empathy Social Skills for Effective Relationships Relate to Ourselves Relate to Others CRM

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Emotional Literacy How Many Different Emotions Do You Know? Can you identify when you are feeling them? Give them 1 minute to list all the emotions they can. Ask if any more than 20 See who has the highest number. Give Feeling List from NVC

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“If we are in a heightened state of agitation or anger we cannot make good decisions, we cannot reason well.” Christine Casper Communication, Motivation & Management Inc. CRM

Self-Regulation People who can regulate their own emotions have the following characteristics: Self-control Manages impulsive feelings and emotions Stays composed Thinks clearly under pressure Conscientious Meets commitments, keeps promises Is accountable Organized and careful in work

Paying attention to your Triggers Your emotions come from within you. They come from your beliefs and values, biochemistry, past programming from childhood, and life experiences Be aware of, and learn to manage, your own emotional “triggers” or “hot buttons” Myth- Others can make you feel a certain way Myth Buster- No one can make you feel a certain way!!! Pay attention to the stories you are saying about your own behaviors or outcomes.

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Self-Motivation People who are Self-motivated show these qualities: Achievement drive Results oriented Set challenging goals Pursues continuous improvement Committed – align personal and organizational goals Readily makes personal or group sacrifices to meet larger goals Has sense of purpose Use core values to make decisions

Initiative Optimistic Ready to act on opportunities Persistence in pursuing goals Operates from hope of success rather than fear of failure Sees setbacks as manageable rather than a personal flaw Initiative – Readiness/willingness to act on opportunities Ready to act on opportunities Optimism – Persistence in pursuing goals despite obstacles and setbacks Persistence in pursuing goals Operate from hope of success rather than fear of failure See setbacks as manageable rather than a personal flaw

Focus on what You Can Do What can you do differently, new, or better to shape a different outcome? What can you let go of so you don’t waste energy on things that get in the way? What emotions do you need to release to move forward with more energy? What you can do is premise of most coaching practices What resentments do you have that holds you back?

Circle of Influence vs. Circle of Concern Circle of Control Circle of Influence Circle of Concern

Article T:\Training\Training Materials\EQ\New Folder\APA-Facial Expressions Facial Cues may show what mood a person is in more than a specific emotion (APA 2000) People can use facial expressions along with verbal tone, body posture, and gestures to indicate their actions or elicit responses from others. Facial expressions can be used as a tool to influence other’s behavior CRM

it will help them modify their own behavior. It will help “If people will stop for a moment and put themselves in another person’s shoes… it will help them modify their own behavior. It will help them develop relationships with those people.” Darryl Grigg, Ed.D. Co-Developer, American Express Emotional Competence Program CRM

Empathy vs. Sympathy Pathos = Feelings Empathy – Understanding another’s feelings Empathy is about awareness and understanding of feelings not agreeing with someone who has those feelings Sympathy – Sharing another’s feelings in that situation You don’t have to join someone in their pity party!

& SOCIAL SKILLS CRM Feelings vs. Needs How can you understand their feelings and needs? CRM

Creating Effective Relationships: Employ all your emotional competencies – awareness, regulation, motivation, and empathy – to: Influence and persuade others. Build consensus and support for team goals. Organizational Emotional Soup What are the positive and negative emotions you see at work? How can you help bring out the positive ones? Motivate and inspire yourself and others to achieve those goals.

"And so there's a real pay-off. The people who will become the leaders, the people who will become the star performers, are the ones who have the strengths in the key emotional intelligence abilities." Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Founder, Emotional Intelligence Services CRM

Five Essential Competencies of Emotional Intelligence Summary and Quiz Five Essential Competencies of Emotional Intelligence Self-_______ _______ _______________ Awareness Relate to Ourselves Regulation Motivation Empathy Relate to Others Social Skills

Application Leadership Effectiveness: Using the 5 Competencies for Decision Making Leading Teams Break into 10 groups, may have to move to a new table for discussion

E.I. for Leadership Discuss and Report out 3 ways your E.Q. Competency would help a leader make better decisions Discuss and Report out 3 ways your E.Q. Competency helps leaders effectively lead teams

Decision Making Self Awareness: Self Regulation: Self Motivation: Decision Making Empathy: Social Skills:

Leading Teams Self Awareness: Self Regulation: Self Motivation: Leading Teams Empathy: Social Skills:

Thank You for Participating Remember Employee Appreciation Day, March 2nd “Aligning Gifts, Passion, and Purpose For Meaningful Work and Job Satisfaction” Questions or Comments??? Linda J. Ferguson ljfergusonphd@gmail.com

For More Resources Contact Linda if you’d like to receive other articles or worksheets on E.I. ljfergusonphd@gmail.com Click HERE for CRM Video Trailer

Contact Linda to arrange a program at your company : (c) 540-588-5928 Linda‘s book “Path for Greatness” is available for bulk orders for your staff. Contact Linda to arrange a program at your company : (c) 540-588-5928 ljfergusonphd@gmail.com Order her book from the publisher: http://bit.ly/buynow_PathforGreatness http://bit.ly/buynow_PathforGreatness