Guide to Parenting and Basic Child Development Adrian Quintana SOC312 Child Family & Society Instructor Baez February 10, 2014

You’re a new parent, now what? Every new parent wishes there was some sort of handbook to tell them how to raise their children. Sadly, no one has been brave enough to tackle that task, but there are plenty of sociological and developmental theories to give you a basic idea of what to expect and how to handle things. This slide show will share some of this information, plus advice on childcare, technology, self-esteem, and outside influences on your child’s life.

We all want the best for our children… When a parent reflects on the future they want for their child, I can almost always guarantee that they want their child to exude: Self confidence Motivation Positive Morals and Values Social Skills A Strong Cultural Identity The Ability to Regulate Feelings and Emotions (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012) Let’s start with the basics of socialization…

Bronfrenbrenner’s Ecological Model (King's College London, Florence Nightingale School of Nursing and Midwifery n.d.)

Bronfrenbrenner Explained Bronfrenbrenner’s Ecological Model explains children's development visually by using different “rings” or interlocking systems of socialization that affect an individual. Microsystems: Family, School, Neighborhoods, Religious and Group Affiliations Mesosystems: Interactions between two microsystems. Exosystems: Funding for Schools, Availability of Legal Aid, After-School Programs, Social Programs, The Economy Macrosystems: Cultural Context, Societal Beliefs, Societal Values Chronosystems: Show how historical events can effect other systems. Microsystems are defined as activities, roles, and relationships that are directly experienced by the individual (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). This includes parents, school, peers, etc. Mesosystems are the interactions between two or more microsystems, such as their parents speaking to their teachers (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). For example, parent-teacher conferences or family church outings both personally effect the individual. Exosystems link two or more mesosystems that do not directly involve the child. This can include perhaps a parent getting fired, which indirectly effects the child. Macrosystems describe a society’s effect on a child, such as cultural and societal values and norms. Chronosystems show how historical events can effect other systems (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012).

Parenting Styles There are three parenting styles outlined by Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist: Authoritarian Authoritative Permissive (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012) There are three parenting styles outlined by Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist: Authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). Each parenting style is based on two parenting attributes: demandingness and responsiveness (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). Authoritarian parents are highly demanding and unresponsive to their child’s needs, while permissive parents are highly responsive and not very demanding at all (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). Both of these parenting styles are extreme and can have negative effects on a child.

Authoritative Parenting Style Authoritative parents are very affectionate and warm, but still give them individual freedom (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). They also communicate their expectations clearly, yet give their child the opportunity to meet those expectations in a mature, independent way. In my opinion, authoritative parenting is a happy medium that includes both high degrees of responsiveness and demand. Being both supportive and demanding shows your child that you are confident in their abilities, yet you will be disappointed if they don’t follow through.

Technology Technology, although not human, has become part of most children's microsystems (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). This is because of the fact that it is in a child’s everyday routine, so it has a great influence on their lives. Too much screen time (time spent in front of a screen) puts children at risk for obesity, can disrupt sleep cycles, and put your child at risk for developing attention problems, anxiety, or depression (U.S. National Library of Medicine 2014). On the other hand, technology can be used to enhance education, and connect a child to current issues or other cultures.

Positive Ways to Use Technology Use parental locks and limit screen time (U.S. National Library of Medicine 2014). Try to use mainly educational media. Turn television watching into a family activity. Set up parental locks on all of your technological devices. Usually all screen devices have the option to block certain types of shows- use this to your advantage. Also, restrict the amount of screen time your child is allowed every day, and enforce it. Show your child educational programming such as the Sprout Network, Sesame Street, ABC Mouse, or other high quality educational media. Turn television watching into a family activity. Set aside a certain amount of time each week for family TV shows or family movie night.

Self-Concept Self-Concept is how an individual distinguishes their own identity from others, so naturally knowing one’s own culture will influence this self-concept (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012. It’s important, especially as adoptive parents, to teach your child about their own culture and ethnicity. Some ways to do this include: Find literature that reflects on your child’s culture or ethnicity and share it with them (Hawley, Irvine, & Landa n.d.) Include your culture’s traditions in your own family life. Celebrate your culture’s holidays. Teach your child to overcome stereotypes by teaching them that every student is an individual despite their culture/ethnicity.

Self-Esteem and Attitude All parents want their children to have a positive attitude and self-esteem. We want our child to feel capable while felling loved. There are many ways to help your child develop their own self-esteem, like: Stay involved in your child’s interests, encouraging them when they fail, and celebrating when they succeed (New 2012). Try to express to your child that they have many strengths, rather than hyper focusing on one specific goal or achievement (New 2012). Having a healthy sense of self-esteem makes it more enjoyable for children to interact with others, work through challenges, and have an overall optimistic attitude (New 2012). If a child has an honest, yet positive mentor like you, they will understand their strengths and weaknesses, and know they can depend on you for support.

Importance of Socialization at Home and School Two of the largest components of a child’s microsystem include their home and school surroundings. Parents are basically their child’s first teachers, so naturally they play a large role in children’s socialization. Parenting styles are influenced by several factors, and each parent is different (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). “…Teachers play a critical role in shaping children's cognitive, emotional, and social development (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012).” As discussed in Slide 3, most parents have the same general goals for there children, which just so happen to be the basic goals of socialization. To recap, these goals include Self confidence Motivation Positive Morals and Values Social Skills A Strong Cultural Identity The Ability to Regulate Feelings and Emotions Each family’s general goals are further influenced and shaped by a family’s cultural beliefs and values, family systems, motivation for parenting, parenting styles, and more (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). . When the time comes for the parents to hand their child over to a child care provider of some kind, this can further change the outcome of the original goals. Parents may choose daycare, nannies, care from a relative, or center-based programs.

Teacher’s Role According to Supporting Children’s Socialization, children of elementary school age spend more time with their teachers at school than with their parents at home (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). Teachers create their own set of rules for conduct and have their own style of enforcing rules and encouraging students. School policies also greatly influence how a teacher does business. This is all something to be considered when figuring out how you’re going to achieve the goals you set for you children- so it is important to stay in close contact and be on the same page with your child’s teachers and school.

Peer Interactions Your child is most likely going to develop relationships with their peers very quickly upon coming into contact with them- we as human beings are social creatures. Your child’s peers are influenced mainly by where you choose to take them- playgroups, child-care centers, hobbies or activities you participate them, neighborhood children, family members, etc (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). How a child handles social interactions starts at home. It is up to you as a parent to teach your child the proper way to interact with others to build a positive relationship.

How to Make Friends Teaching your child the basics of social interaction might help them make friends in the future. Help your child understand how to be friendly, honest, how to share, be kind, and be selfless by talking to them about it and playing with them yourself (Efird n.d.). Set up ways for your child to practice social interaction by setting up time for them to play with others. Play dates and extracurricular activities are great ways to introduce your child to new people (Efird n.d.). Another factor that plays into how children react with their peers is their ability to express thoughts and emotions (Bojczyk, Shriner, & Shriner 2012). Children with greater communication skills have an easier time getting along, because they understand one another and can communicate properly.

References Bojczyk, K. E., Shriner, B. M., & Shriner, M. (2012). Supporting children’s socialization: A developmental approach. San Diego, CA: Bridgepoint Education, Inc. Efird, J. (n.d.). Helping your child make new friends. Retrieved February 10, 2014, from http://www.pbs.org/parents/education/going-to- school/social/make-new-friends/ Hawley, W., Irvine, J. J., & Landa, M. (n.d.). Culture in the classroom. Retrieved February 10, 2014, from http://www.tolerance.org/culture- classroom King's College London, Florence Nightingale School of Nursing and Midwifery. (n.d.). Bronfenbrenner's ecological framework [Photograph]. Retrieved from http://keats.kcl.ac.uk/pluginfile.php/737715/mod_resour ce/content/1/page_07.htm New, M. (2012, March). Developing your child's self esteem. Retrieved from http://kidshealth.org/ parent/emotions/feelings/self_esteem.html# U.S. National Library of Medicine. (2014, February 3). Screen time and children. Retrieved from National Institutes of Health website: http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/ patientinstructions/000355.htm