Emotional Intelligence Introduce self My role with the court My training/experience with EI Why I think EI is important personally and professionally Julie Binter Organizational Learning Professional Arizona State University/Arizona Supreme Court

Peter Salovey & John Mayer

Emotional Intelligence “The ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth.” - Salovey & Mayer 1999 Peter Salovey is Provost and professor of psychology at Yale University. Jack Mayer is a professor of psychology at the University of New Hampshire. The two psychologists published the first academic definition of emotional intelligence in 1990, and have continued as the leading researchers in the field. In part their interest began when they realized that the conventional definitions of intelligence were inadequate because people with “high IQ” frequently made very poor decisions. They began to explore the missing ingredient and showed, in the lab, that people can “be smart” with feelings.

Our Focus Today What is EI? Why is important? How do you develop it? The Questions These are the questions listed on the information for the training – what we will be covering

Emotional intelligence is effectively blending thinking and feeling to make optimal decisions.

EI is FUSION Objective: Participants will know the goal is synthesis, not “heart over head.” “Fusion is the active state of engagement that comes when heart and mind are in synch. It feels awake, powerful, compassionate, and courageous.” - Josh Freedman Remind the audience that this is an integrative model -- the goal is to put people back together, not to just shift the dominance from mind to heart.

EI = Being Smart with Feelings

 Taste   Touch   Smell   Sight   Sound  We receive information through all of our senses every minute of every day. All of that information is being interpreted by our brains and causes emotions in us/release of chemicals.

It results in physiological reactions as well

Provide Data Exist Rub off on others Affect us

What Gets in the Way? FLIPCHART ANSWERS What do people say about emotions and feelings? Emotions are “bad” Not okay to express them at work or in public Seen as a weakness Different messages for different people (men vs. women) What do adults tell children when they get angry, excited, or sad? HOW DO PEOPLE TALK ABOUT EMOTIONS IN PROBATION? what’s your code language?

Our Brains Limbic brain Cortical brain emotions, memory, attention language, math, analysis

80,000x the speed of the cortex or “thinking brain” Feeling Brain Limbic brain Emotional Headquarters Thalamus “watches” for threat Hippocampus pays attention Amygdala houses reactions Briefly talk about the 3 pieces within the limbic brain Ask what they think about the speed, and how that might impact them (ie emotions take over) 80,000x the speed of the cortex or “thinking brain”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isiSOeMVJQk

“emotional headquarters” “Air traffic controller” Cortex “Translator” Joseph LeDoux developed this model and presented it in The Emotional Brain. Walk through each slide, explaining how information/sensory input is being processed normally. The sensation or stimulus – often enters through one or more of your senses… The thalamus acts to keep the signals moving… The visual cortex in this case “thinks” about the impulse and makes sense of it… This signal is sent from the cortex to the amygdala where a flood of neuropeptides are released to create emotion & action… Sensation “emotional headquarters”

“Air Traffic Controller” “emotional headquarters” Hijacking “Air Traffic Controller” Cortex “Translator” Sensation “emotional headquarters” In a state of threat -- perceived risk -- the thalamus bypasses the cortex and signals go right to the amygdala. Reaction occurs without intellectual thought. There is an intelligence at work, but it is not well trained in most people! More: http://www.eqtoday.com/hijack.html Sometimes, the brain reacts to a potential threat and bypasses the cortex (thinking brain) and the signal goes straight to the amygdala.

“Amygdala Hijacking” Feeling Brain cut off from Thinking Brain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0VOgGPUtRI Hijacking - Joseph LeDoux, The Emotional Brain

Have you ever seen or had an amygdala hijacking? Tell a story about a time I had a hijacking if no one has a story to tell Explain that hijacking doesn’t just happen in severe or crisis situations, it can happen whenever there is a perceived threat Ask for examples of perceived threats (ie an accusation, an offensive remark, someone in your way, road rage) ASK: after someone has been hijacked, do they instantly go back to their relaxed or original state?

Reaction Cycle Connect the timeframe of Escalation to the origin of Six Seconds’ name Explain the need to reconnect with your thinking brain Explain options within the 6 Seconds timeframe (what you can do, count, etc.)

Escalator Six Seconds EQ Network The Reaction Cycle Every time we go around the cycle, we are moving up the escalator to a more reactive or heightened state. When we experience a big reaction it’s typically because we’re in an escalated state. We got there through a series of small steps, each building up the potential for a reaction. A state is a semi-permanent combination of thoughts, feelings, and physiology. ©Six Seconds

Why is EI important?

Social and emotional abilities were 4x more important than IQ in determining professional success and prestige. (Feist & Barron, 1996 cited in Cherniss, 2000) 25

UCLA research indicates that only 7% of leadership success is attributable to intellect; 93% of success comes from trust, integrity, honesty, creativity, presence and resilience. (cited in Cooper and Sawaf, 1996) 26

what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” “They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” – Carl W. Buechner

Developing EQ Know Yourself Choose Yourself Give Yourself Self Clearly seeing what you feel and do. Choose Yourself Doing what you mean to do. Give Yourself Doing it for a reason. Self awareness Self management A person can increase their emotional intelligence by digging deeper and increasing their competencies within the three main areas of EI:   We’re going to spend the rest of our time together talking about the 3 areas Self Awareness – KNOW Self-Management – CHOOSE Self-Direction – GIVE The competencies within each of those areas (which come from 6 Seconds) What you can do to develop your own EI Self direction

Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks What am I feeling? ©Six Seconds

Emotional Literacy The ability to accurately identify and interpret both simple and compound emotions HOW ARE YOU DOING ON A SCALE OF 1-10?

BMH Scan

Recognize Patterns PATTERN WORKSHEET – TOP HALF

Know Yourself How aware am I of what I am feeling in the moment? Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks Know Yourself How aware am I of what I am feeling in the moment? How do my feelings, mood and behavior impact other people? What helps me manage my feelings to stay more positive? ©Six Seconds

Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks What options do I have? ©Six Seconds

Six Seconds EQ Network The Reaction Cycle “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy .” Martin Luther King, Jr. ©Six Seconds

Choice Points Choice Points Six Seconds EQ Network The Reaction Cycle To increase your emotional intelligence, it’s important to know where your choice points are within the reaction cycle. WEIGH THE COSTS AND BENEFITS of reacting how you normally do, vs. choosing a different response Choice Points ©Six Seconds

Six Second Pause

EI You Can See Autopilot Blaming Unforgiving Defending Stonewalling Judging Excluding Choice Bouncing back Listening Empathizing Risking Flexing Including Walk through the slide and compare it with flipchart answers – how did they do? Ask: Do you know more people who practice High EI behaviors or Low EI behaviors? What do you think are the reasons for that? 38

Consequential Thinking PATTERN WORKSHEET BOTTOM HALF

Navigating Emotions

The Plutchik Model How many emotion words in english language?

Optimism

Intrinsic Raise your hand if you wrote down a situation on your reaction cycle worksheet that has happened more than once. Keep your hand up if your reaction to that is typical how you respond to that type of situation I’d like to ask someone to volunteer to be put on the spot for a few minutes so we have an example we can use for the topic of consequential thinking (If no one volunteers, use my own example of Kerryann)   On a flipchart, walk through each section of the pattern worksheet HANDOUT the Pattern Worksheet Ask people to commit to completing the worksheet after the workshop and share it with one other person – it’s especially beneficial if it’s the person that you have established a pattern with

Choose Yourself What causes me to get hijacked? Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks Choose Yourself What causes me to get hijacked? How am I currently managing my feelings? How can I become more aware of how my emotions impact the decisions and choices I make? ©Six Seconds

What is my empathic and principled choice? Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks What is my empathic and principled choice? ©Six Seconds

Noble Goal

Give Yourself What motivates my life today? Introducing EQ EQ Building Blocks Give Yourself What motivates my life today? How can I connect more deeply with others in my daily interactions? How empathic am I? ©Six Seconds

Take Action! Harvard Business School research on goals verbal goals, and the remaining 84% had no written or verbal goals. Those graduates with verbal goals were earning twice that of those with no verbal or written goals. But those with written goals were earning ten times as much. One of the best things you can do (next to writing down your goals) is to have someone hold you accountable. Show your written goals to a friend or family member and ask him or her to check in with you on a regular basis. You will be more inclined to stick with your plan if you know that someone will be asking you about your progress. We’ve covered a lot today about emotional intelligence and I want you to walk away with ideas and tools that you can put into practice right away. I’d like you to take a moment to think about one thing that you learned today that you’re willing to try in the next 30 days. Take a small piece of paper and write it down. At your table, you have one minute for everyone to say theirs out loud. Next write down your email address and crumple up the piece of paper. On the count of three, I want everyone to throw their paper up in the air, in any direction. Now go find a piece of paper (that isn’t your own) and commit to checking in with that person in 30 days to ask them how it’s going.

Thank You! Julie Binter Organizational Learning Professional Introduce self My role with the court My training/experience with EI Why I think EI is important personally and professionally Julie Binter Organizational Learning Professional Arizona State University/Arizona Supreme Court juliebinter@yahoo.com