To prevent violence against women MEN AS ALLIES Tuesday November 27 10:30-11:30 AM Central Time Presenter: Molly Zemke Domestic Abuse Intervention Services (DAIS) Facilitator: Rose Hennessey Wisconsin Coalition Against Domestic Violence (WCADV) Please use your phone for the audio portion of today’s program. By 10:30 dial… (toll-free) Access code: 

 About the presenters  History of DELTA  Agenda OVERVIEW Rose Hennessy, MPH Wisconsin Coalition Against Domestic Violence Molly Zemke Domestic Abuse Intervention Services

 1 in 4 women have been the victim of extreme physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime  1 in 5 women have been the victims of sexual assault in their lifetime  Victims of intimate partner violence (IPV) can experience physical injuries, post traumatic stress disorder, absenteeism, increased risk of several chronic illnesses, and death National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) Summary Report. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 2010 CONTEXT FOR OUR WORK

 Hundreds of agencies and coalitions across the nation are dedicated to supporting survivors of IPV  Shelters  Advocacy  Counseling  Legal assistance  Support groups  Primary prevention seeks to stop the violence before it occurs by looking at the factors that lead to gender-based violence CONTEXT FOR OUR WORK

 Individual factors:  Belief in strict gender roles  Desire for power and control  Homophobia/heterosexism  Community/societal factors:  Weak sanctions for perpetrators  Negative portrayal of women in the media  Social norms supportive of violence  Institutionalized sexism Intimate Partner Violence: Risk and Protective Factors. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC): RISK FACTORS FOR PERPETRATION

 What are characteristics society would say make up a “real man”? MASCULINITY AND VIOLENCE

 What are characteristics society would say make up a “real man”? MASCULINITY AND VIOLENCE Tough Unemotional Good with women In control Dominant Strong Successful

 Boys and men experience peer and societal pressures to conform to the “man box”.  Men who step outside the “man box” are negatively portrayed as being feminine or gay.  The “man box” places unrealistic expectations on boys and men at the expense of their wellbeing and the wellbeing of women. MASCULINITY AND VIOLENCE

 Men perpetrate the majority of violence against intimate partners, but the majority of men are not perpetrators  Benefits to women and men  Many men want to get involved  Men have influence over other men  IPV is community issue WHY WORK WITH MEN

 Can’t live up to the “man box”  Men know and love women  Social justice issue  Better relationships with women and other men MOTIVATIONS FOR MEN

 Other men as leaders  Women doing the work WHO SHOULD WORK WITH MEN

 What do you want to accomplish by educating or engaging men?  Who do you want to educate?  How do you want to educate them?  What do men want to do? GOALS FOR WORKING WITH MEN

 Well-meaning men and male privilege  Frustration with slow change  Lots for men to lose by stepping outside the “man box” CHALLENGES

 Focus on stories  Stay positive  Have check-ins  Meet them where they’re at  Seek leaders  Develop trust and build relationships  Make action easier  Trust the process  Provide incentives Adapted from Men Can Stop Rape, From Theory to Practice STRATEGIES

 Bystander intervention (BI)  Seeks to empower bystanders to intervene when they hear disrespectful language and see abusive behavior.  Men who are likely to commit violence tend to over-identify with traditional masculine values. This makes them especially sensitive to what other men think.  The focus is to provide the majority of men who are uncomfortable with this behavior with the permission and skills to confront it.  This can change the peer culture that tolerates and promotes violence against women. (Link to a Bystander Intervention exercise as well as other prevention exercises can be found at PROMISING APPROACH

 Men Can Stop Rape  A Call to Men  Tony Porter, TED Talk  Rus Funk, Reaching Men: Strategies for Preventing Sexist Attitudes, Behaviors and Violence,  VAWnet.org Special Collection: Men and Boys: Preventing Sexual and Intimate Partner Violence RESOURCES

 Molly Zemke, DAIS   Phone: (608) ext. 306  Web site:  Rose Hennessey, WCADV   Phone: (608)  Web site: CONTACT THE PRESENTERS

DISCUSSION