Life Long Relationships: Friends This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Jn. 15:12 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted,

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Life Long Relationships: Friends This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Jn. 15:12 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Eph. 4:32

Theme Our ultimate sense of fulfillment comes as we give ourselves to God directed friendships.

Introduction Discovering the real meaning of friendship

I. FRIENDSHIP The Basic Biblical Laws

Law 1: God Made Us To Be Friends With Others The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone [literally, ‘by himself’]. I will make a companion who will help him.” Genesis 2:18 The truth is that we neither live nor die as self-contained units. Romans 14:8 JBP …Abraham believed God… and he was called the friend of God. Jas 2:23

A. Friendship Described A relationship in which there is mutual love and respect, accompanied by honesty and disclosure. The family Love your wife The Neighbor Love your neighbor The Church They will know that you are of Me by the way you love each other Gather together, encourage one another The City/States Honor the king

B. Friendship Abandoned Warning: Ignoring this design feature has terrible consequences Validation in the sciences: self-isolating people suffer loss Less healthy and live shorter lives The destructive nature of solitary confinement

Law 2: Friendship Is The Valuing Of All Kinds Of People Jn. 15:12 This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. God NEVER asks us to do something without the gift of enabling us to do it. God ALWAYS gives tasks that have value for all. Most of us want friends that are just like us If we do end up with a “different” friend, we spend a lot of time trying to get them to be like us.

Excuses people have given for not developing friends In God there are no racial divisions In God there are no social class divisions In God there is no introvert/extrovert division In God there is no intellect division In God there is no skill division

Warnings Without friends, we are unable to use certain skills, talents and gifts, which are only useful in relationships What about dangerous people (angry, depraved, hateful, etc.)?

Law 3: Friendship Means Action/Caring As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. Pro. 27:17 A friend loves at all times. Pro.17:17a Do not forsake your friend and the friend of your father… Pro.27:10a There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Pro.18:24b

Friendship involves Responsibilities & Opportunities Friendship… … is an activity, an action … involves communication … means choice … means mutuality … means conversation … involves disclosure … means forgiveness … means giving of yourself

II. FRIENDSHIP The Need of the Hour

A. Research Reveals about the Millennial Generation Value friendships significantly more than the Builders, Boomers and Busters CHURCH: They show up at church and they want friends. If they don’t see any they wont be back. EXAMPLES: They want to be mentored – shown what to do – rather than told SKEPTICAL: They are prone to do foolish things so they are subject to criticism, so they need loyal friends, friends to stick with them, people who put up with the unimportant nonsense LISTEN: They can tell if you will be their friend if you do more listening than talking, more asking friendly questions than using critical questions. JESUS: They will listen to us about Him if He is real in our life

B. Personal Experience Why do they want me??? I treat them as equals – Law 1 I like being with any and all of them – Law 2 I am actively interested in them – Law 3

Our Challenge… Moving from acquaintances to friends Friends are “friends” because we actually care about them and do those things that CONTINUALLY reveal that caring. This requires God’s Grace.