Chapter Twelve Raising Children: Promises and Pitfalls

Contemporary Parenting Roles Parenting is a two-way street. As our children are learning, so are we. Do you agree with this statement? “Parenting does not come naturally and is neither innate or instinctive” Harry Harlow

Rewards and Difficulties of Parenting Parenting can be rewarding but stressful. Social theorists cite role conflict - when two or more roles contradict and role strain - conflicts that someone feels within one role

Decreased Authority Do Parents have less authority today than in the past? Why? Do parents have increased responsibility?

Motherhood About 70% of Americans say that mothers today have a more difficult parenting job than did mothers 20 or 30 years ago. Almost 66% of children under age 18 live with two employed parents. mothers continue to do most of the child rearing and household duties.

Motherhood Generally, the greater the father’s participation in child rearing, the greater the mother’s satisfaction with her life.

Fatherhood: Ideal versus Realistic Roles Fathers also experience role conflict and role strain…they may have little opportunity to learn parenting skills.

Sociologist Kathleen Gerson suggests there are three types of fathers. –Breadwinner fathers - see themselves as primary earners, even if their wives work outside the home. See wife’s tasks the of raising the children and the household duties. Fatherhood: Ideal versus Realistic Roles

–Autonomous fathers—seek freedom from family commitments and distance themselves from both their former spouse and their children.

Fatherhood: Ideal versus Realistic Roles –Involved fathers - extensive participation in the daily tasks of raising the children. Try for equality in parenting.

Child development theories Mead’s Theory of the Social Self George Herbert Mead was a symbolic interactionist. He saw the self as the basis of humanity that develops not out of biological urges but from social interaction.

Piaget’s Cognitive Theory Jean Piaget was interested in the growing child’s efforts to understand his or her own world. He proposed four major developmental stages that children go through in their quest to understand the world and to become older thinkers. Some Theories of Child Development

Erikson’s Psychosocial Theory Erik Erikson is one of the few theorists whose explanation of human development encompassed the entire lifetime. According to Erikson, there are 8 stages of development and in each stage is a challenge to development. Some Theories of Child Development

Piaget’s Theory of Cognitive Development Typical Age Range Description of Stage Developmental Phenomena Birth to nearly 2 yearsSensorimotor Experiencing the world through senses and actions (looking, touching, mouthing) Object permanence Stranger anxiety About 2 to 6 years About 7 to 11 years About 12 through adulthood Preoperational Representing things with words and images but lacking logical reasoning Symbolic Thought Pretend play Egocentrism Language development Concrete operational Thinking logically about concrete events; grasping concrete analogies and performing arithmetical operations Conservation Mathematical transformations Formal operational Abstract reasoning Abstract logic Potential for moral reasoning

Parenting What type of parenting did you experience? How were you encouraged to learn certain behaviors/skills? How were you taught responsibility? How were you disciplined? What would you repeat with your kids? What would you not repeat?

Discipline Discipline means “to teach.” Sometimes as parents we use verbal teaching skills or even corporal punishment, but deciding which is most effective for each child can be difficult.

Parenting Styles Important Dimensions –Parental Responsiveness –Parental Control Styles Styles (Diana Baumrind) 1.Authoritarian (Too Hard) 2.Permissive (Too Soft) 1.Indulgent 2.Indifferent 3.Authoritative (Just Right)

Baumrind’s Parenting Styles Authoritarian Parents are restrictive and punitive. Children tend to be socially incompetent, anxious, and exhibit poor communication skills. Indulgent Parents are highly involved but set few restrictions. Children have poor self-control. Neglectful Parents are uninvolved. Children have poor self- control, don’t handle independence well, and low achievement motivation. Authoritative Parents are nurturing and supportive, yet set limits. Children are self-reliant, get along with peers, and have high self-esteem.

Parenting Variations Parenting varies based on socioeconomic class and race in the United States. In 2005, only 26% of Latino children ages 3-5 were read to daily, compared to 44% of white, black, and Asian children. Reading is an important task for parents because it helps ready the child for school. There are also variations in outings with parents across race.

Parenting and Social Class There are many variations in parenting approaches across social classes in America. socioeconomic status (SES)

The Empty Nest Syndrome? Why are young adult children moving back into the “empty nest”? These are boomerang children. For most, this is a temporary fix for their problems until the children are financially able to care for themselves again.