P UTTING IT ALL TOGETHER : R EVISION Unit 7 Seminar

A RE THERE ANY QUESTIONS FROM U NITS 1-6?

S CHEDULE YOUR TIME Make a schedule for drafting and stick as closely to it as possible. Do not write the entire essay in one sitting. You can do it all if you begin now !

R EMEMBER THE PROCESS... The most common way students get “lost” in the essay is by not following the process for writing. The topic, thesis, and outline have been parts of this process. The draft and receiving feedback will be important parts of the same process; all this work is connected. Take time to make time; create a schedule for your work so that you can juggle all the responsibilities in your life.

S EEKING H ELP Ask for help when you need it! Your instructor is eager to help, but many times cannot help on the day before a project is due because there is not enough time. Also use the Kaplan Writing Center as part of your writing process from beginning to final draft. What other helpers, resources, and “amulets” exist?

D RAFTING Let’s look at how one student organized her work. On the next page, you’ll see a highlighted paragraph. The functions of each paragraph have been highlighted as: 1: Topic Sentence 2: Supporting Details 3. Closing Sentence

B ODY PARAGRAPHS Example body paragraph (thesis key point 1): topic sentence, support, closing sentence At the outset, Internet publishing promises writers powerful representation from major book vendors. For example, many Internet publishers have deals with industry giants such as Barnes and Noble and Amazon. In exchange for shared royalties, these booksellers list, promote, and sell both self-published and so-called “virtual reads” to their customer base (Lowell, 2005). This powerful marketing tool means that a writer can self-publish while having the selling advantage of those who have waited a long time to find print-publishing acceptance. This advantage can be attractive, as seen in the over 59 percent increase in self-published and electronic books (Lowell, 2005). As more booksellers agree to sign on for print-on-demand and e-book partnerships, the reading world can expect more authors to take this virtual publishing route.

R EVISING AND E DITING What is the differenc e between revising and editing?

R EVISING

REVIEW THE STRUCTURE, AUDIENCE, AND PURPOSE Step 1: Review each body paragraph of the essay: Check the structure Check the topic, supporting, and closing sentences for expression Check the evidence Consider the modes used/that could be used (PREFACTS) Step 2: Review the introduction: Check the two main parts of an introduction Check the three functions of an introduction Step 3: Review the conclusion: Check the two main parts of a conclusion Check the three functions of a conclusion Step 4: Consider your target audience Step 5: Review the purpose

Revising means “to look at [the content] again. Focus on the ideas and their expression Read out loud Get away for a while Use a helpful acronym: ARMS: Add? Remove? Move? Substitute? FACT: Fit? Add? Cut? Test? Use invention strategies Review discarded ideas (e.g., the “trash” file) Any other successful strategies? WHAT ARE SOME TIPS FOR REVISING A PAPER?

WHAT IS EDITING? WHAT ARE SOME TIPS FOR EDITING A PAPER? Get away for a while Read it out loud Make your words work! Check the last word in sentences. Are they working? Don’t be boring! Add variety in diction and syntax Use parallelism Check coherence (e.g., transitions) Check for punctuation—under use and over use Don’t be “Double-Preposition Man/Woman” Check for typos and wrong words Avoid lapsing into the informal first or second person in an academic paper. Narrating your internal thought process should also be avoided. Avoid unnecessary jawbreaker words and “triangulation strangulation.” Other tips?

P ROOFREADING VERSUS S PELL C HECK Spell check is a good first pass of your document, but it should not be relied on to catch every error. For example, spell check won’t catch misused words, only misspelled words. They are good tools, but you must be the one who knows how to use them.

M ISUSED W ORDS Homophones —words that sound the same but have different spellings Homonyms— words that sound the same and look the same. However, they have different meanings. Since the words sound alike but have different meanings, homophones won’t usually be caught by spell check. I or eye? Its or it’s Defiantly or Definitely?

E XAMPLES Examples of these words are: -affect vs. effect elicit vs. illicit -there, their, they're lead vs. led -too, two, to may be vs. maybe -then vs. than principal vs. principle -loose vs. lose desert vs. dessert

DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCES IN THESE PAIRS? Most stores (except/accept) American Express. The (affect/effect) of the storm was frightening. Carmen is (already/all ready) in class. Marcus is under the (allusion/illusion) that he is famous.

A S Y OU E DIT... Keep in mind that a sentence does not have to be brief to be effective; long sentences can be worthwhile, too. In fact, an essay’s sentence length and structure should vary. Some sentences should be brief and others should be longer. Punctuation and the “sound” of sentences should vary. However, every word should be necessary.

P ARAGRAPH WITH TOO MANY SHORT SENTENCES Autism may be caused by injections. Specifically, the injections given to infants are suspect. Booster shots for tetanus, measles, and Diphtheria may contain thermasol. Thermasol is a preservative made with mercury (Tyson, 2004). Preservatives are added to give the drugs a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to process mercury. This may put those people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

P ARAGRAPH WITH TOO MANY LONG SENTENCES It seems impossible to not see the link between injections for children and the rise of autism in our country. Because American children receive a host of preventative inoculations such as measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality and quantity of the injections are problematic in the long term. With millions of dollars of profit at risk, pharmaceutical companies are choosing to include a mercury preservative that gives these injections a longer shelf life. Thermasol, the mercury preservative in question, leaves a residue behind in the system, and in particular the nervous system (Tyson, 2004). Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves grow puts people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

P ARAGRAPH WITH A BALANCE It seems impossible to not see the link between injections for children and the rise of autism in our country. Specifically, the injections given to infants are suspect. Because American children receive a host of preventative inoculations such as measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality and quantity of the injections are problematic in the long term. Thermasol is a preservative made with mercury (Tyson, 2004). Preservatives are added to give the drugs a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to process mercury and the nervous system suffers. Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves grow puts people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

W HAT QUESTIONS ARE THERE ON APA STYLE AND FORMAT ?

A RE THERE ANY REMAINING QUESTIONS OR TIPS ON REVISING OR EDITING ?

Thank you for a great seminar! Have a wonderful week!