SOCIAL SKILLS BEN WAHL, MSW

Building Social Skills  Addressing Bullying  Young Adult Transitions

Bullying Definition  “Bullying is when someone repeatedly and on purpose says or does mean or hurtful things to another person who has a hard time defending himself or herself.”  -Olweus, Limber, 2007

Types  Physical aggression, Verbal aggression  Indirect aggression, Relational aggression  Special consideration: Cyber-bullying

Social Thinking Profile  Neurotypical Social Communicator (NSC)  Resistant Social Communicator (RSC)  Nuance Challenged Social Communicator (NCSC)  Emerging Social Communicator (ESC)  Challenged Social Communicator (CSC) -Garcia Winner et al, 2011

Bullying  How special needs students are often targeted.  Preventative steps:  Precise questioning  Friends  Social radar  Scripts  Specific strategies for talking to an adult.

Bullying  How special needs students are sometimes mis- labeled as bullies.  Preventative steps:  Social thinking training  Understanding context  Working with the school  Teaching flexibility/compromise  Social radar

Bullying  Parent Response  How to regain control.

Cyber-Bullying

Types of Cyber-Bullying Harassment: Repeatedly sending offensive, rude, and insulting messages Cyber Stalking: Repeatedly sending messages that include threats of harm or are highly intimidating. Flaming: Online "fighting" using electronic messages with angry, vulgar language Denigration: Distributing information about another that is derogatory and untrue through posting it on a Web page, sending it to others through or instant messaging, or posting or sending digitally altered photos of someone Impersonation: Breaking into an or social networking account and using that person's online identity to send or post vicious or embarrassing material to/about others. Outing and Trickery: Sharing someone's secrets or embarrassing information, or tricking someone into revealing secrets or embarrassing information and forwarding it to others. -Nancy Willard, the Center for Safe and Responsible Internet Use (CSRIU), 2004

Cyber-Bullying: Considerations 1. Anonymity. 2. Less awareness/increased stigma. 3. Adults feel disempowered by the digital landscape. 4. Victim does not have a safe place. 5. Victim fears reporting, will lose privileges. 6. Dis-inhibition, bully is disassociated from their behavior. 7. Long term effects, increased public humiliation.

Talking to youth about cyber-bullying  Prevention: Stop, Block, Talk  Think before you write: -‘Golden Rule Test’, ‘Trusted Adult Test’, ‘Front Page Test’, ‘Real World Test’  Computer in a public place.  Parent should have password.  Alternatives social outlets. Less computer time.

Bullying  Questions?

Young Adult Transitions  The Transition is an ongoing process.  What are steps that can be taken at school?  At Home?  In the Community?

Young Adult Transitions  Building more responsibility in the home.  “House Contributions”  Self-monitoring of computer time  Shopping trips  Budgeting  Self-monitoring of homework assignments

Young Adult Transitions  Social Outings:  Help initiate social outings, even if it feels awkward.  Help develop social radar.  Try once, then decide.  Pre-brief outing and build predictability.  Outings with set times and locations and ‘purpose’ are often easier.

Young Adult Transitions  Accommodation with Accountability.  What is self-advocacy?  What is hygiene and why is it important?

Young Adult Transitions  Try to teach patience and perseverance.  ‘Comfort with discomfort’.  -Help them find small steps towards their big goals. Emphasize journey over destination.  -Have boundaries and accountability (20 hours per week minimum, wake up time, screen time).  -Chores (household contributions), homework and independent living skills as much as possible on their own (even driving sometimes). It starts the progression towards independence.  -Help them learn the importance of wellness.  -Try to find as many opportunities for real-world experiences and social connection as possible.